


Who needs a shining armor?

by GreenQueenofClubs



Category: Star Wars Episode VII: The Force Awakens (2015)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Medieval, Blacksmith!Rey, Bodyguard!Finn, M/M, Queen Organa, Rey is awesome, Royal!Poe, Slow Burn, but thats a given, like really slow burn, well get to kisses and smut at some point i swear
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-01-14
Updated: 2016-02-04
Packaged: 2018-05-13 22:55:40
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 7
Words: 44,577
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5720056
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/GreenQueenofClubs/pseuds/GreenQueenofClubs
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Finn had never expected to leave the Knights of Ren, let alone live to tell the tale. Finn had never expected for an orphaned blacksmith to become his best friend.</p><p>But Finn had never, ever expected he would ever live in the Royal Castle to serve as a bodyguard to Duke Dameron.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

Finn was sleeping fitfully, dreams plagued by the terrifying mask of Kylo Ren, looming over him. He jerked awake with a silent scream, torn from his dream just before Kylo Ren’s sword pierced his stomach.

His labored breathing was the only thing breaking the silence of his bedroom, and he turned toward Rey’s bed, worried he might have woken her up. It was thankfully empty, which wasn’t all that surprising. The young woman might not have nightmares as violent as his, but there was a restlessness thrumming right under her skin that often kept her up at night.

Slowly, he got to his feet, groaning. He knew he wasn’t going to be able to go back to sleep, but that didn’t mean his body didn’t suffer from the lack of rest. It had been a very draining few days, and Finn’s nightmares had a nasty habit of resurfacing at the worst possible time. He rubbed his face, willing himself to wake up properly. It somewhat worked, so he decided he might as well go and check that Rey hadn’t worked herself into a stupor.

Unsurprisingly, he found her in the forge, hammering away at the latest piece of scrap metal she scrounged up. She would undoubtedly be able to make a pretty good knife out of it, but the chances it would get the price it deserved in this part of town was laughable. Nevertheless, it’d keep them fed and somewhat clothed, so he wasn’t really going to complain. It wasn’t like he had much marketing skills at the moment himself.

Rey turned toward him with a fleeting look of concern, but was well too aware that she could offer very little comfort against the demons of Finn’s past. Her simple presence was already soothing for his nerves, and he couldn’t ask for more, not after everything she gave him already. He’d be dead ten times over without her, either at the hand of the Knights of Ren for deserting, or at the hand of the people for having been part of the Knights of Ren in the first place, or even simply of starvation.

Finn sat himself on his designated chair, far enough from the hammer not to be too bothered by the sound, but close enough to the oven to be warm. He watched the sun rise slowly over the roofs of the town, wishing dejectedly he could be anything else, to feel useful rather than a burden for Rey to bear.

He remembered the night he fled the Knights, when all the horrors that he had been forced to experience became too much, when he disobeyed for the first time in his life. He ran away, taking the prisoner they had been torturing with him. He never even saw the man’s face properly, first hidden under a mask, then covered in bruises and blood and shrouded in the darkness of night.

All he’d known was that he wouldn’t ever be able to kill for the Knights, and that they would kill him for it.

In return for abandoning everything he’d ever know, he got his freedom and a name, a proper name, not a jumble of letters and numbers. Finn. Even now, every time he used it he felt like he was sending the Knights to Hell.

All he got learned in return from the man was his name. It was almost poetic. A name for a name. Poe.

They were separated quickly, and Finn had never seen him again, but he couldn’t forget him. Poe.

“You’re moping again.”

Finn snorted and looked at Rey from the corner of his eye. She still had her back toward him, and yet she knew his mood with certainty. He didn’t even bother arguing.

“I’m heavily sleep deprived. I am entitled.”

Rey chuckled, and put down her hammer, holding out the blade to her eyes, checking for defects. Apparently satisfied, she put it down on the anvil, and walked over to him, bending down to kiss his forehead.

It was a familiar gesture, something they easily gave to each other whenever they were off, and Finn smiled fondly afterward. Rey straightened back up, tugging at his sleeve. He followed her easily to the backroom of the forge where they lived.

Finn grabbed something for both of them to eat, and brought it to the table where Rey was already seated. She considered him for a moment before clearing her throat.

“I was thinking about going to the Middle Market today, to try and see if I could get better prices over there. I could really go for a little slack until my next project.”

Finn knew she wouldn’t ever give herself actual free time, even if she was able to afford it. Rey needed to be doing something at all time. That wasn’t what bothered him, though.

“You can’t go to the Middle Market, they’ll gut you,” he said, frowning. Rey rolled her eyes at him, shooting him a piece of bread that hit him squarely between the eyes.

“I can handle myself”, she scoffed, and she really could. Finn had never seen anyone fight as well as her outside of the Knights and the Royal Army, but-

“But they’ll be a lot of them. You can’t fight everyone at the same time.”

“Maybe you could accompany me, then. I’m sure you could intimidate them with those big muscles of yours, protect poor little old me.”

Finn’s head snapped up, eyes popping. Her expression was far too innocent to be believable, and Finn knew now exactly what she had in mind since the start of the discussion, if not the day. He stared at her helplessly.

“I can’t, Rey.”

She sighed, leaning forward.

“Come on, Finn, it’s time.”

Finn shook his head, hands already shaking at the prospect of leaving the Lower Town. Over here, everyone was too miserable or too messed up to really care about who he was. Those who might give a damn usually had even worst pasts then him.

“I’m safe here, Rey.”

She opened and closed her mouth, desperate to say what she had to say without hurting him. Finally she gave up, and he face smoothed into that soft but determined expression Finn knew a little too well.

“Well, I’m going anyway. I’ve waited ten years back in Jakku, I’m not going to do the same here.”

Finn groaned, and got to his feet, pacing the length of the small room, rubbing his hands over his head. When Rey brought up the small village where Finn found her, he knew nothing would ever change her mind. It had left too bitter a taste in her mouth. Finally, he sighed and plopped back down on the chair, pressing the heels of his hands to his eyes. Rey hadn’t moved or talked, letting him working through his thoughts on his own.

As much as he appreciated being allowed to make his own choices now, sometimes he missed the omnipresent orders of the Knights.

“You know this is going to end badly, right?”

“The Knights are not going to find you here, Finn. They’ll never dare get into D’Qar, the city is too strong.” Her voice was soft and fond.

“They’re not who I’m worried about, Rey. Troopers are not exactly popular. If even one person _suspects_ who I am-“

“Who you used to be.” Rey interjected calmly.

“They’ll all lynch me.” Finn kept going without paying mind to what Rey said.

“How would they know? It’s not written on your forehead? You certainly don’t act like a Trooper anymore.”

“Rey-“

She jumped to her feet, leaning forward on the table, eyes bright and strong, but never raising her voice.

“Is it really all you want? To hide down there, never venturing farther then four streets away? Fading away because you’re too afraid? You can do better than this, Finn. We both can!”

He looked at her for a long time, and there was so much that he could say, like that they could also do so much worse. He could be captured and killed, or tortured, or simply thrown in jail to rot there for the rest of his life. At least here he had her, and could walk out in the sun, even if only for four streets.

He didn’t say anything, though, because he knew that she would go to the Middle Market today, with or without his help, because she was Rey, and she believed she could get a better life. The worse thing was, Finn knew that if anybody could, it would be Rey.

He also knew that she could be in danger, despite all her strength, and that if she got hurt while he cowered back at the forge, he would never forgive himself.

“Okay.”

The smile exploded across her face, her nose scrunching up adorably, and she raced around the table to throw her arms around his neck. He hugged right back, smiling despite herself, unable to resist her joy. Then she jumped away, running to the forge, to gather everything she planned to try and sale at the market. Finn pulled on the few clothes they found for him so that he wasn’t so distinctly from the Knights of Ren. He finished with the leather coat he had kept ever since the night he had ran away.

It was the only thing of the mysterious man, of Poe, he found when he went back looking for him. He had found it in a clearing close to a puddle of blood far too large to be survivable. He had very little hope for the poor man, and that thought still hurt him. He had kept it around ever since, despite it being far too luxurious for someone like him to have.

If all he could keep from the man who helped him escape was a name and a jacket, he was going to hold on to both of those for as long as he could.

Rey bounced back in the room to make sure he hadn’t run away, and they were off. The city was built in three concentric half circles wrapping themselves around the royal castle. It wouldn’t take all that long to go from the Lower City to the Middle City, but the Markets had been thought as to occupy both edges of the half circles, meaning that Finn and Rey, living near the site of the Lower City market, had to traverse the entire length of the Middle City.

Therefore, Finn had plenty of time to reconsider why the whole enterprise was a terrible idea, and sharpen his paranoia. About half way there, he felt he was going to vibrate out of his skin. It got so bad that Rey reached out and grabbed his wrist, rubbing gentle circles on his skin with her thumb. He sent her a grateful look, and tried his best to get his nerves under control.

On the other hand, by the time they finally got to the market, Finn was starting to actually believe that maybe no one would be able to recognize him as a former Trooper. No one had so far paid them any kind of special attention. He helped Rey set up her stand without constantly looking over his shoulder.

The Middle Market was usually peaceful, mostly frequented by the normal population looking for groceries and everyday tools, and those were the ones Rey was hoping to have as clients. There were, however a few less scrupulous individuals, either coming from other cities, or from the Lower City, looking out for fresh meat that they could swindle or bully out of their possessions to sell themselves afterward. A lot of the citizens of the Lower City that had tried to pierce the Middle Market had come back limping and empty handed.

Some such people showed up as the morning was ending. Finn had been surprised at the number of clients they got. He had expected the market goes to be wary of outsiders. Quickly enough, though, the quality of Rey’s smiting made itself known, and by the time the five men showed up at their table, shoving everyone else away, they had made more money than they would have had in a month in the Lower City.

The tallest man leaned over the stand, his face getting way too close to Rey’s for Finn’s comfort, and he took a few steps forward, to be within reach if he needed to intervene. Rey refused to move away, staring stonily into the eyes of the brute.

“Hello, sweetheart.”

Rey grimaced at the name, and Finn only barely kept himself from punching the man himself, determined to let Rey take the lead on this one.

“What can I do for you today, Sir?”

“Those are very pretty knifes you have there.”

“They are, Sir.” Rey’s voice was perfectly even, and the man narrowed his eyes, not expecting such resistance from a woman.

“How about we give you five bronze pieces for the lot, and we can all leave happily?”

Rey only raised an eyebrow, not even offering an answer. The four other men shifted closer, getting ready to assist their leader, laughing like the grunts they were, already celebrating what they thought would be an easy fight.

“Look, girl, you take the five pieces, or we break your hands and take the goods anyway.”

A crowd was gathering behind them, and Rey shifted, getting herself ready for the fight.

“Only an idiot would break the hands of a good blacksmith.”

The thug growled, and lunged forward. Finn let Rey deal with him, and moved to the one closest to him. Two of the others turned to face him, while the leader and the last one attacked Rey. They clearly thought Finn was the biggest threat, and it quickly came to bite them in the ass. Finn dodged a few hits, and by the times he laid down the first guy with a punch to the head, Rey had already knocked both of her assailants with her trusted staff, and jumped on one of Finn’s. With only one foe left, Finn finished swiftly with another punch, and almost too quickly, the whole brawl was done, only him and Rey standing. She was still pristine, and he would have a nasty bruise on his side, but nothing more.

There were a few beats of silence, then the crowd cheered loudly, and the few people stupid enough to bet on the two of them came to thank them, slapping their backs. Finn and Rey took it graciously, despite not being used to be this acknowledged this positively.

With the attention they drew on themselves, they sold the rest of their goods very quickly, and by the time the sun set they were back at their forge, feeling giddy and optimistic as they rarely had the reason too. The whole walk back, they went over and over the fight, excitedly chattering on how the other had done so well.

That night they ate until they were full, something they could almost never afford to do, certain that the morning after they would have enough money to buy back even more.

Exhausted by the events of the day, Finn slipped quickly into sleep that night, and didn’t wake until the sun was shining through the window the morning after. Rey was already gone, but when Finn walked over, the bed was still warm. He hadn’t been the only one to get a good night sleep, something they both sorely needed.

When he walked to the forge, Rey was already hammering at a new project, humming under her breath. Finn walked closer, peering at the blade.

“You could have taken a day off, you know.” He smiled at her.

Rey rolled her eyes are him without stopping.

“We need to get back next week if we want to build a clientele, and we need something to sell.”

Finn leaned forward to get a better look at her face.

“You’ll spend all your time in here, won’t you?”

She stopped to give him a sheepish smile, and he chuckled, bumping her shoulder with his own.

“Alright, I’ll leave you to it, I need to go buy us stuff to eat.” He grabbed the back of her neck and tugged her forward to kiss her forehead.

 

OOOOOOOOOO

 

The next week ran by quickly, Rey spending every waking minute she could in the forge, while Finn took care of everything else in the house, cleaning, cooking, and dragging Rey away from her work long enough for her to eat and sometimes sleep.

On the day of the big market, Rey woke Finn up at dawn, shaking him until he groaned and squinted up at her. She was beaming way too widely for the hour of the day, but as usual, Finn was unable to resent her.

They left even earlier than the week before, but by the time their stand had been installed, a few clients were already inspecting their wares. The sales were even better than the week before, and their reputation had apparently spread widely enough that no one else came to bother them.

By the start of the afternoon, they had sold all they had and were packing up, when a loud scream pierced the already noisy market. Finn turned toward Rey and they locked eyes for only a split second before she jerked her head in the direction of the noise. He took off running toward it, knowing Rey would be right behind him.

They arrived at the scene to see a large group of thugs threatening a woman, one of them holding a small child who was fighting desperately to free themselves. A man appeared from another alley and threw himself into the fight punching the nearest thug. Finn and Rey were right behind him. Finn quickly got the child and the mother out of reach and made sure they were safe. The fight was dirty and messy, but ultimately, Rey and the other man won, and Finn couldn’t help but be glad the thugs from last week were not as skilled as those.

He turned back toward the two victims, and after making sure they were uninjured sent them on their way, a bit uncomfortable under their grateful gazes. By the time he had straightened back up, Rey was by his side. He was about to ask her if she was fine, when the other man spoke for the first time.

“Finn?” His voice was full of an emotion Finn couldn’t identify, and Finn turned to face him, frowning.

When he saw Finn’s face properly, the other man beamed so wide, Finn thought the entire market got brighter, and he barely had the time to wonder how he could possibly know him before the man was running toward him, and engulfing him into the tighter hug he had ever received. He responded on instinct, until he heard the man whisper again his neck.

“Thank god, I thought you were dead, buddy.”

Suddenly he knew, and he choked out “Poe.”

The man laughed, and pulled away slightly, still holding Finn by his arms. Finn would have been disappointed if it hadn’t meant he could finally look at Poe and know what he looked like.

“Where were you? I looked around everywhere for you when I woke up?”

Finn frowned at him, finally finding his voice.

“I was looking for you, but I couldn’t find you, and I had to run from the Knights.”

Poe’s face shifted to stormy, and Finn could tell he was wishing death and suffering on the entirety of the Knights. The look quickly disappeared as he looked down.

“Is that my jacket?”

Finn’s heart dropped, and he quickly moved to remove the coat, not wanting Poe to think he was stealing from him.

“No, no, no!” Poe immediately put the coat back on his shoulders properly, smoothing it with the flat of his hands. He smiled at Finn. “Keep it, it suits you.”

He bit his lips, and seemed to be about to say something more, but Rey had apparently had enough of being ignored, and cleared her throat loudly. Finn spun back toward her, feeling a bit guilty about leaving her out like he did.

He pulled away from Poe, waving Rey forward with a wide smile.

“Rey, this is Poe, the man who helped me escape the Knights of Ren. Poe, this is Rey, she’s great.”

Poe smiled warmly at Rey and shook her hand, but he didn’t step away from Finn, which didn’t escape the notice of the man, or Rey’s, if the look she was shooting at Finn were any indication. Poe turned back toward him.

“What are you doing here? How did you get here at all? I thought the Knights had caught up to you, after I couldn’t find you.”

Finn opened his mouth, both confused as to which question he should answer first, and very much aware that they were in the middle of the Market, and that people were staring. Rey caught on faster than the men, clearing her throat once more, amused.

“Maybe we should take this conversation elsewhere?”

Poe finally seemed to catch on, and he nodded, chuckling self-deprecatingly.

“Of course, come on, I know I decent tavern close by.”

Once they were tucked in a corner, away from prying eyes and ears, Poe turned back to Finn expectantly. The other man took a fortifying sip of beer, and shrugged.

“There’s not much to tell, really. We got separated by the Knights, and I had to run for a good while before I lost them. Then I doubled back to find you, but I had to go slow. By the time I found anything, there was only your jacket and a lot of blood. I had to leave, because the Knights were still searching the woods. I found a little village, and Rey, and she helped me, gave me food, and all that.”

Rey snorted, flicking his ear lightly.

“Please. You crawled into Jakku half dead, were drinking water directly from the horse bucket, with nothing on your back other than bloody rags and that kriffing jacket. You didn’t find me. I thought you might be some rich bloke who would give me money if I helped him.”

Finn rolled his eyes at her, before turning back to Poe.

“Which obviously didn’t happen, but by that time, pretty much everyone knew I was there, and that Rey helped me, so the Knights showed up, and we had to run together. We decided the safest place we could think of was D’Qar, and we came over here.”

Poe was still looking at him, as if waiting for him to keep going. When it became obvious that Finn was done, he looked at Rey, then at Finn again.

He leaned forward, squinting slightly.

“But that was months ago? What happened after?”

Finn and Rey shared a confused look, and Rey raised an eyebrow at him.

“Well, we were careful not to go too fast and get caught, but that’s it?”

Poe seemed even more confused.

“But the way over couldn’t have taken more than two weeks, if you were walking very slowly.”

“It took ten days.” Finn really couldn’t see what Poe was angling for, but it didn’t seem threatening, so he was willing to follow his lead until he got to his point.

“So what have you been doing for the past, what, four months?”

“We’ve been living in the city?”

Poe leaned back, shaking his head, looking between the two of them as if expecting them to come up with the punch line any second now.

“Impossible, I hear about everything that goes on in the city, I’d have known about it.”

“Well, I don’t see how you’d know all about the Lower City, we’ve been there for months now and we still don’t know most of it…”

Poe jerked in his seat, slamming one of his hand on the table accidentally.

“You’ve been living in the Lower City?” He was barely keeping himself from shouting, eyes wide and sharp. Finn was stunned at his reaction, and couldn’t think of anything to say. Rey shifted a little, her tone stung.

“Well, we don’t exactly have a lot of money, and I needed to set up my forge.”

Poe seemed frozen for a second. Then something occurred to him, and he squinted at them.

“You’re a smith? And you both come from the Lower City? You wouldn’t happen to be the two new people that beat up Jabba and his crew last week?”

Rey straightened up a bit, and nodded, still a bit irritated at his comment on the Lower City, but willing to forgive him.

“You heard about that?” Finn couldn’t help but blurt out.

Poe threw a warm smile his way.

“I told you, I hear everything that goes on in this city. But seriously, that was you two? Thank you for that, they really needed some sense knocked into them, I heard you were amazing.”

Rey smile at him before taking a sip. Finn looked down, a bit embarrassed. Poe nudged his shoulder with his.

“People have also been talking about this amazing smith who seemingly appeared out of thin air, and was selling for great prices. You wouldn’t happen to know who that might have been?”

Rey snorted at Poe’s transparent inquiries, and took her knife out of her belt. She didn’t like fighting with knifes, but she always kept one on her, in case she really didn’t have a choice. Poe took it with bright eyes, and started weighting it, checking the balance. Once he was apparently satisfied, he started whirling it around in intricate moves. After a minute he stopped, eyes sparkling.

“This is amazing!”

Rey smiled back, always proud of her work and skills. Poe leaned back in his seat, taking a long look at the both of them.

“Why are you staying in the Lower City?”

Rey frowned, not pleased that the conversation circled back to that topic, and Finn looked down, slumping slightly. Poe pressed on.

“I mean, I get why you settled there when you came, no money and all, but why now?”

Rey shrugged, and it was obvious that she was going to let Finn answer this time. He took a deep breath, but still didn’t raise his eyes.

“Because it was safer that way.”

Poe chocked on the sip of ale he was taking, and stared at Finn.

“Safer? In the Lower City? There’s a least two murders a week down there!”

Finn forced himself to lock eyes with Poe, pitching his voice low.

“Defending myself is pretty much the only thing I know how to do. No one cares where I came from in the Lower City, they wouldn’t ever guess I was a Trooper. I’d rather not hang for serving Kylo Ren.”

Poe looked gobsmacked, as if the thought never even came to his mind. To his defence, Finn had to admit he was probably the kind of nice and decent people that never really thought about executions.

“I would have vouched for you, buddy. No one will ever blame you for serving the Knights when they know you saved my life.”

Finn could guess Rey was probably doing something very interesting with her face at the moment, but he couldn’t force himself to look away from Poe.

“I thought you were dead. I thought the Knights got you back, and that I couldn’t stop them. And even if I wasn’t convinced to my core than you died in that forest, which I was, I didn’t even know what you looked like before today, let alone know your full name.” Finn hissed at Poe.

Poe swallowed, and leaned back, which was when Finn finally noticed how close they had gotten during their conversation, maybe even too close to use the ‘we didn’t want to be overheard’ card. Rey looked bemused, but not worried or irritated.

Poe, on the other hand, was looking between the two of them, before apparently coming to a decision, and downing the rest of his pint.

“You’re not going back to the Lower City.”

Both Rey and Finn’s eyebrow jumped to their hairlines. Finn couldn’t think of something to say, but Rey did.

“Of course, we have to go back, all our stuff is there! We live there!”

Poe shook his head.

“I’ll send someone to gather your things, don’t worry, and you’ll come and live with me.”

“But you barely know us!” Rey wasn’t shouting because she was too smart for that, but it was a near thing. Poe shrugged with a charming grin.

“Of course I know you. Finn saved my life, and you saved his. As far as I’m concerned, you’re practically family.”

“What about my forge? I need someplace to work!”

“That will not be a problem at all. Don’t worry, Rey, I promise I’ll make sure you’re as comfortable as you deserve to be.” He gave her a charming grin. “After all, Finn thinks you’re great, and I already know he is.”

Poe looked absolutely earnest as he spoke, face open and warm, and Finn knew without a doubt that he was sincere. Rey seemed to believe so as well, because she nodded tersely. Poe then turned to Finn, and lowered his voice so that even Rey would have trouble hearing it.

“What about you buddy? I won’t force you to come, if you really don’t want to, but I swear I’ll make sure no one will give you grief over you ever being a Trooper.”

Finn’s throat was tight, but he forced himself to speak.

“I don’t want to burden you.”

Poe smiled at him, and clapped a hand on his shoulder.

“You would never. Ever. Ok? If you hadn’t been there, I’d be dead. And I saw what you did at the market today. You deserve better than to be stuck in the Lower City. You both do.”

Finn finally relented, knowing that Poe was at least right about Rey, and that maybe if Poe helped, he could find a way to make himself useful. If he was really ready to vouch for Finn, he might even be able to use his old skills. Poe beamed at him, squeezing his shoulder before releasing him, getting to his feet.

“Come on, before the sun sets.” Finn and Rey shared a look behind his back, and followed him through the streets of the Middle City.

They were moving toward the center of D’Qar, and the streets were getting cleaner and cleaner, the people dressed in finer clothes. Finn shouldn’t have been surprised, Poe’s jacket was obviously of a high quality, and the Knights of Ren wouldn’t have been as interested as they were in him if he was just anybody. Still, he had never set foot in this part of the city, and the mere possibility that Poe, and by extension, the both of them, would live there from now on was mind boggling.

Little did they know that their destination was not in the Middle City after all, as it became apparent when they reached the fortification surrounding the High City. There was a small hidden door tucked in a corner and Poe gestured them closer as he knocked. A small panel opened at the top as two eyes peered at them, taking in Poe’s large smile, than Finn’s and Rey’s confused expressions.

The panel closed with a snap, and the entire door opened, and a large bearded man gave Poe a wry look, waving them inside. Poe smiled once more at him and led the two others through a tunnel, and suddenly Finn couldn’t take it anymore.

“Poe, where are we going?”

Poe smirked at him over his shoulder.

“To the palace, of course!”

Before Finn had a chance to answer, they reached the end of the tunnel, stepping into a hallway that couldn’t belong to any other building but the castle. The smooth stone walls were adorned with old tapestries depicting ancient wars, with large opening leading to other rooms and stain glassed windows casting colorful shadows everywhere. Poe didn’t leave them much time to admire the décor, already leading them away.

As they were walking, they crossed the path of a servant. The man stepped out Poe’s way with a bow.

“Duke Dameron.”

Poe smiled kindly at him.

“Good day to you. Could you please tell the chief of staff that the two other rooms in my suits need to be suitable for company tonight?” The man nodded eagerly. “Thank you very much.”

The man smiled at Poe and nodded again, walking quickly away. Finn turned to Poe, trying to pick his jaw off the floor.

“Duke Dameron?” Even he had heard of Duke Dameron. He was one of the tales Troopers would be told to keep them in line, scary tales of the evil enemies awaiting them in battle. The Duke was one of the Royal Army’s best fighters, the leader of their cavalry.

Poe, for some reason, blushed a bit and rubbed the back of his head.

“Yeah?”

“Why didn’t you tell m- us?”

“It didn’t really matter? At least I didn’t think it did.”

Rey snorted, and crossed her arms.

“Well, Duke or not, I’m not curtsying for you.” She was aiming for unimpressed, but she only sounded amused, barely restraining herself from laughing at Finn’s dumbfounded expression.

Poe threw his head back and laughed.

“Please don’t. I’ve been trying to get everyone to stop for years, but they just won’t listen. Come on, let’s get something to eat.”

The room Poe brought them to was bigger than their entire house in the Lower City, but Poe assured them it was the smaller dining room, the one where the Royal Family would eat when they were just amongst themselves.

“Are you part of the Royal Family?” Rey asked while Finn was busy wolfing down the amazing food they had been served.

“Kinda?” Poe shrugged, “I mean, technically no, not directly, but my mother was very close to the royal siblings, so Queen Organa pretty much adopted me after my parents passed away. Now with her son and her brother gone, well…”

Rey nodded, not wanting to bring Poe down while he was being so generous to them. Poe quickly changed subject and starting telling them about that time went on a prank war against the majority of the cavalry.

Finn didn’t remember the last time he laughed so much.

Later that evening, Poe brought them to his suit. The door opened into a private reading room, with another door leading to a hallway connecting the bathroom and the three private rooms Poe had full usage of.

Poe announced he was leaving Finn and Rey to settle in, i.e. chose who would use which room, and left the suit. Rey raced to the room closest to the bathroom, and lunged on the bed, laughing loudly as she bounced on the mattress. Finn followed at a more sedate pace, trying to take everything in.

His own room shared a wall with Rey’s on one side, and with Poe’s on the other, and his window overlooked the courtyard of the castle. He could even see parts of the Middle City and the Lower City over the high wall surrounding the High City.

He heard Rey walk to his door, and turned to face her.

“Finn, if you ever feel like saving hot strangers’ lives ever again, please, please do.”

He rolled his eyes at her, and she giggled. Slowly her face settled down again, and she started fretting with her clothes.

“Do you think we can trust him?”

Finn had been asking himself the same question, but could only come to one conclusion.

“I don’t see why not. He didn’t have to do anything for us. I would never have been able to recognize him by myself. If he wanted to arrest me, he would have done it already by now.”

Her smile bloomed again, which was a reward in itself, and she ran to hug him.

“We’re in the palace, Finn! In the palace!”

They decided that they might as well explore the suit, until Poe came back. They wordlessly agreed to leave Poe’s room alone. Their own rooms were almost identical, cozy but impersonal, and they obviously hadn’t been occupied for a long time. The washroom had a basin and latrines. That might have been the greatest discovery they made so far. Not having to go out to the back house in the middle of freezing night was a gift from the gods.

The living room was more interesting, being the only room they inspected that Poe had really personalised. A large hearth occupied one wall, with a few comfortable and well-worn armchairs and couches cluttered around it. A large bookcase took up another wall, and in the back was a large desk, with numerous maps and notes sprawled over it. Finn tried and failed to understand Poe’s scraggly handwriting, so different to everything Finn had ever seen, while Rey curled herself in an armchair in front of the fire.

Since she spent most of her time in the forge, she really wasn’t a big fan of cold.

Poe opened the door at that moment, and Finn jumped away from the desk, not wanting to look like he was trying to spy on Poe. The other man, however, simply smiled at him, in this warm, kind way he had that was starting to make Finn’s stomach feel weird.

“I’ve asked for baths to be drawn for the both of you, so you’ll be able to wash off. Here’s some clothes you can wear while yours are being washed.”

He placed the two bundles down for them to take. Rey went over to inspect them, while Finn blushed.

“I can wash our clothes myself, you don’t need to-“

Poe was already waving his oppositions away with a grin.

“No, no, no, don’t worry about it. The staff is already aware that you’re here, and I don’t think they’ll take no for an answer. They’re all pretty curious about you, I don’t have a lot of guests.”

As he said the last part, he looked away, rubbing at the back of his head. Rey and Finn shared a look and Rey slapped his shoulder.

“Well, I would have never known, you’re a great host.”

Poe gave her a grateful smile, and Finn, finding nothing to say, simply moved closer to him, bumping their shoulders together.

“I also ran into the Head Blacksmith, and he’s pretty interested in seeing what you can do in a forge, Rey.”

Her eyes popped out, and she beamed at him.

“Really?”

Poe nodded, and before he could answer, a knock came to the door. When Poe called out to come in, a servant popped her head in, and announced the bath was ready. Rey turned toward Finn, and he waved toward the bathroom.

“Go ahead, you stink more than I do.”

She snorted and slapped his arm, but didn’t argue as she gathered her new clothes. Suddenly, Finn was alone with Poe. He turned to the other man, and found Poe considering him with an unreadable expression.

Finn stared back, because, in all honesty, in the fire light, Poe looked almost out of this world. His dark curly hair looked impossibly soft, and his kind eyes shone brightly. Finn was used to beautiful people, he had been living with Rey for over four months now, but that was something else entirely.

Poe was the first one to break the silence, exhaling loudly. He took three long steps and wrapped Finn in a hug just as tight as the one they shared earlier. Finn answered in kind, as if holding on for dear life.

Rey wasn’t the most comfortable person around physical contact, and usually kept her hugs short, unless very strong emotions were in play. Finn could see himself getting used to Poe’s hugs very quickly. Poe sighed against his neck.

“I’m so glad you’re not dead.”

Finn huffed once, and hold even tighter.

“Yeah, me too.”

“Nah, buddy, I think I drove everyone here crazy, insisting to go back right after they got be back.”

Poe slowly let go, and clasped his shoulder, keeping Finn close enough to him that he saw the honesty in his face. Finn pinched his lips, a bit overwhelmed by Poe’s bubbling emotions, drawn in by his soft eyes.

“I only did what anyone would have done.”

Poe snorted and shook his head, squeezing Finn’s shoulder.

“You saved my life Finn, and you were the only one who did that, by yourself. Because you’re a good man. That’s why you’re here.”

Finn cleared his throat, nodding jerkily.

“Thank you, for everything.”

Poe beamed at him.

“Anytime, buddy. Anytime, anything. I mean it.”

He had the good sense to change the conversation after that. His lifelong service for the Knights of Ren had left Finn with very little experience on how to deal with emotions, and that was one of the few areas of expertise where Rey couldn’t really help him.

Instead, Poe started telling him more stories about the cavalry, and about the friends he’d like to introduce Finn and Rey to. Finn didn’t have to contribute to the conversation much, for which he was grateful, more than happy to simply listen to Poe and to try and make sense of this new world he’d been thrusted into.

He couldn’t tell anybody how much time had passed before Rey came back to the room and shooed him to the bath.

He had never taken a warm bath before in his life, and his first thought when he slipped in was that he was never getting out, ever again. He stayed in until the water became uncomfortably chilled, and he dried himself quickly. He slipped in the clothes Poe had brought for him, draping the Poe’s old jacket over his arm.

When he came out into the living room, only Poe was there, staring at the fire. He looked up at Finn.

“Rey already went to bed. Said she wanted to be well rested to meet the smith tomorrow.” He frowned. “She does know she doesn’t have to start working right away, doesn’t she? She could take it easy for a while.”

Finn snorted, and settled himself into the chair next to Poe’s.

“Good luck trying to tell that to Rey. She’ll be up at the crack of dawn to get started.”

Poe snorted, and looked back at the flames.

“The Queen will love her.”

Finn felt his heart stutter. It hadn’t occurred to him until that moment that being Poe’s guest meant that he would probably have to meet the Queen at some point, and probably sooner than later.

“Well, Rey’s pretty great. Everyone should like her.” He managed to say, but all his hopes that he had sounded casual were destroyed when Poe turned toward him with a concerned frown. The man saw right through him, and stretched to pat his arm.

“She’ll love you too, Finn.” Great, apparently now he had two people in his life that could read his mind. He scoffed, and Poe leaned even more toward him, with a grin.

“In fact, she already does. I told her all about the brave man who saved me.” Finn felt himself blush, and cleared his throat.

“Does she know about- You know?”

Poe tilted his head.

“About you being a former Trooper?”

“Yeah?”

“Yeah.” Finn felt himself starting to panic. Not only was he going to meet the Queen, but she knew he used to serve her biggest enemy. Suddenly, there was a warm hand squeezing his arm, and he looked up in Poe’s concerned eyes.

“Finn. Relax. I swear she’ll like you. I was the one who told her about you, and I’m a pretty good seller. She knows about how you threw off years of conditioning and training to desert the Knights, and how that was the only thing that allowed me to survive and come back. You’re probably one of her favorite person at the moment. She’s kind of attached to me.”

Finn really had nothing to say to that, so he turned back toward the fire. A few seconds later, Poe took his hand back.

He didn’t realise he was falling asleep until Poe shook him awake softly.

“Go to bed, Finn.”

 


	2. Chapter 2

The next morning, the only thought in Finn’s head was that he must have somehow found a way to fall asleep on a cloud. There was no other way for whatever he was on to be so soft.

After enjoying a few moments of ignorant bliss, he finally convinced himself to open his eyes. Finn panicked briefly, not recognizing the room, not remembering how he got there. The memories of the day before started trickling back in, and he melted back into the mattress. It was still early, the sun barely peeking through the window, and at the moment, Finn could see no reason why he should move from under the covers.

Which was, of course, Rey’s cue. She burst into the room, jumping on the bed, narrowly missing Finn’s legs.

“Come on, sleepy head!”

Finn groaned and pressed his face into the pillow.

“Reeeeeeyyyy.”

She started poking him in the ribs.

“Come on, get up!”

“Whyyyyyyyyy.”

She jumped to her feet and moved up the feet to start poking him in the head.

“Because Poe insists we have to eat breakfast before I go to the forge. As in, all of us, together.”

“That’s because I thought neither of you would want to face the rest of the castle on your own. But sure, make me the bad guy here.”

Finn finally raised his head to peer at the doorway. Poe was leaning on the frame, easy grin stretching his mouth as he looked at the both of them. Finn groaned and stretched, swatting Rey’s hand away.

“I’m getting up, alright.”

Rey smiled and skipped to the door, slipping beside Poe and leaving. Poe stayed only a few second longer.

“You should probably hurry, I’m pretty sure she’ll drag you out half naked if she has to.”

Finn shrugged on the clothes Poe gave him the night before. For a moment, he considered leaving the jacket off, knowing people would probably be able to recognize it as Poe’s. On the other hand, Rey and Poe would definitely question it if he suddenly stopped wearing it. Everyone would know they were Poe’s guests by the end of the day anyway, so he put it on, leaving his room.

Rey was waiting by the door, listening to Poe explain something about the forge. The second she saw Finn, she threw the door open and walked out. Poe and Finn shared an amused look and followed her out at a more sedate pace. Rey leaded them for about five steps until she slowed down to a stop, turning to them.

“I have no idea where I’m going.”

Poe snorted and walked on, bringing them back to the ‘smaller’ dining room from the night before. It was empty once more, and they settled down to eat, Rey wolfing down her breakfast.

Soon afterward, though, the door opened again, and a small older woman entered the room. Poe beamed at her, and went to hug her, before bringing her up to Finn and Rey.

“Your Majesty, let me introduce you to Finn, the man I talked to you about, and his friend, Rey.”

Finn was immensely grateful that he hadn’t had a mouthful to choke on. Rey seemed star struck, and she jumped awkwardly to her feet. The queen smiled kindly and reached forward to grasp her upper arm.

“It’s a pleasure to meet you, Rey. I have heard of your talents, and I am glad you are with us.”

Rey smiled back at her, nose scrunching.

“Thank you, your Majesty.”

Queen Organa then moved toward Finn, who did his best not to look like he wanted to disappear under the table. Poe offered him a reassuring smile over the Queen’s shoulder.

“And you, Finn. Poe told me all you’ve done for him. I am forever in your debt for saving him. You are welcome to stay at the castle for however long you might want.”

She squeezed his shoulder, and moved to sit down at the table opposite him and Rey, right beside Poe. Finn swallowed and stammered back at her.

“Thank you, your majesty. For everything.”

She smiled kindly at him.

“I had very little to do with this, my dear, but I am truly glad Poe brought you in.”

Finn felt his face stretch into a wide smile he usually only ever gave to Rey. Poe nudged his ankle with feet, looking elated that they were getting along so well. For a while, they ate in comfortable silence, Finn taking his time to enjoy all the new foods available on the table. Even the things he had eaten before tasted better than they ever did, and more than once his eyes fluttered shut in joy.

When the Queen finished eating, she broke the silence, pining Finn under a sharp gaze.

“Tell me, Finn, what are your plans here?”

Finn slowly raised his head, eyes wide. He couldn’t answer, having truly no idea. He floundered, mouth opening and closing without producing any sounds. Poe was frowning, looking between the Queen and Finn, and Rey pressed their knees together.

The Queen pressed on, small smile on her face slightly worrying to Finn, and even apparently to Poe.

“Don’t get me wrong, you don’t have to do anything. For what you’ve done for Poe, we’ll quite happily to make sure you’ll have a very comfortable life here at the castle, for as long as you wish. However, you seem far too young and full of life to waste away like that. Rey looks like she cannot wait to get started at the forge. What will drive you? What will keep you alive?”

Finn swallowed past the lump in his throat, and shrugged.

“I have very little skills to be useful, Your Majesty.”

She scoffed.

“Nonsense. You have been trained for the Knights of Ren, you obviously have fighting aptitudes. And you could be quite useful as an informant, if you ever chose to sit down with my strategists. But I wasn’t asking about what you can do, I was asking about what you _want_ to do.”

Finn stared at her. Never in his life had he had the chance to even think about what he _wanted_ to do. First he had to serve the Knights, then he did whatever he had to survive.

Rey piped in.

“He likes to take care of people he cares about, protecting them.”

The Queen hummed, and Poe pipped in.

“He’s a good fighter, and he likes to protect people, maybe he should consider the Resistance.”

The Resistance was the special guard of the city, the best fighters. Finn imagined himself fighting amongst dozens of other soldiers again, only this time, most of them would despise him for his past. His distaste must have shown somewhat on his face because the Queen chuckled.

“No, I don’t think that would be right for Finn.”

Poe was also looking at Finn, and pressed their ankles together in a silent apology. The Queen wasn’t done talking.

“No, I think Finn might need a more individual context, where he might get more chances to find himself while also interacting with people he’s close to and comfortable with.”

Finn nodded along, because that sounded like a dream job, but he couldn’t really conceive what that would entail.

“What would you say of being Poe’s bodyguard?”

Finn felt his heart stutter just as Poe stuttered out loud.

“Wh- I d- this is- I don’t need a bodyguard!”

The Queen glared at Poe.

“In the past few months, you have been kidnapped once, attacked three times, and have been involved several times in street fights. We have no reason to believe that the Knights of Ren have stopped trying to catch you, and you are certainly not stopping yourself from running head first into trouble.”

Finn, who hadn’t known about Poe being attacked, jerked up, sitting perfectly straight. From the guilty looks Poe was sending him, his ignorance hadn’t been a coincidence. Poe still tried to argue with the Queen.

“Your Majesty-“

“Finn has already proved his proficiency in combat, on top of a tendency to protect you. You obviously like his presence enough that you are ready to share your private space, so prolonged exposure shouldn’t be a problem, and you get along enough that he would be more of a companion and less of a chaperone.”

She stopped talking for a second, and laid a hand over Poe’s.

“I am worried, Poe, and would have insisted for you to take a bodyguard anyway. I simply thought Finn would be a more palatable option for you.”

Poe pinched his lips, and turned toward Finn.

“Finn-“

Now sure the discussion between the Queen and Poe was over, he interrupted Poe.

“You were attacked?”

Poe grimaced.

“Yiiiish?”

Finn glared at him.

“Why didn’t you tell me?”

Poe shrugged his shoulders.

“It didn’t really seem to matter yesterday?”

Finn turned toward Rey, looking for support, but she only gave him a ‘leave me out of this’ look. He then turned toward the Queen, taking a deep breathe. He felt resolve slowly seep in his veins.

“I’ll do it.”

Poe frowned, and leaned forward.

“You don’t have to do it, Finn. It’s only a suggestion.”

Finn looked at him steadily.

“She’s right. It’s a good job for me, and I want to do it.” Suddenly, though, he doubted, and he added quickly “If you don’t want of me, though, I can find something else. It’s no problem.”

“No! No, it’s fine, it’s great, I’d love for you to be my bodyguard.”

Finn smiled, relieved, and Poe answered in kind. Finn heard Rey snort, but by the time he turned toward her, she looked overly innocent, batting her eyelashes at him. The Queen clapped her hands together.

“Well that’s settled. Poe, after you bring Rey to the forge, you can show Finn to the armory, so he can get equipped.”

With that she rose, dropping a kiss on the side of Poe’s head, and nodding her good byes to the two others.

There was a silence as the door closed behind her, then Poe started laughing, and soon Finn and Rey joined.

“Well, that went well.”

 

OOOOOOOOOO

 

The forge was pretty far away from their rooms and the dining room, and by the time they reached it, Rey was practically vibrating. As soon as Poe introduced her to the smiths, she launched into a lightning fast discussion with them, and Finn dragged Poe out, knowing she wouldn’t resurface for hours. As they walked out, Poe slung an arm around Finn’s shoulder, dragging him closer.

“So you’re my new partner in crime, uh?”

Finn frowned playfully at him.

“I thought I was supposed to keep you out of trouble, not help you find more of it.”

Poe threw his head back with a loud laugh, and slapped his back.

“Come on, buddy, what’s the fun in closing off all the possibilities right away?”

The armory was pretty much what Finn expected, as it was very similar to the one the Knights of Ren kept. The only difference he could observe was the larger variety of weapons available in the castle. The Troopers of the Knights all fought with the same weapons, medium length swords and shields, designed specifically to do as much damage as possible while not hindering those fighting next to you. Troopers were meant to fight as a group, not individuals, and their weapons reflected that.

Nevertheless, when Poe told Finn to go and choose something for himself, he settled for the sword that looked the closest to what he was used to.

When Poe frowned at him, also recognizing the similarity, Finn shrugged.

“I know how to use this.”

Poe cocked his head, before walking further into the room, and reappearing with a large sword, the kind that you had to use both hands to wield. It was gorgeous, obviously having been crafted by a master, and Finn couldn’t help but stare at it. Poe presented it to him with a large smile.

“I think this will be more up your alley.”

Finn’s head jerked up, and he took a step back, shaking his head vigorously.

“No, no, that’s a bad idea. I’ve never even touched something like this.”

Poe rolled his eyes at him, and stepped closer.

“So you keep your little sword for the moment, and you train with the broad sword until you feel comfortable with it.”

Finn frowned at him, his hand fidgeting with the handle of the shorter sword.

“You can’t give this to me. It’s a knight’s weapon, not for- for whatever I am.”

Poe scoffed, and bumped their shoulders together.

“But you are now the companion of Duke Dameron! You’re even better than a knight!”

Finn glared at him.

“I’m pretty sure that’s not how it works.”

Poe sighed and suddenly his eyes turned soft and kind, and Finn knew he just lost the argument.

“You could protect me a lot better with this one.”

Finn struggled for a while, before conceding defeat and nodding. Poe straightened back up, and grabbed his arm, tugging him out of the room, toward another part of the castle. Finn really needed to remember to ask for a map, if he wanted any chance to find his way on his own.

“Where are we going?”

“To the training ground.”

Finn frowned at him.

“Why?”

“Because we need you to get started on your broad sword training!”

“We do?”

Poe threw him a smile over his shoulder. However, just as they were entering the sanded arena, where other people were already sparring, a woman came running toward Poe. Poe smiled widely at her and gestured her over, but Finn was pretty sure that was only to keep up appearances. She had the face of a woman who didn’t care overly much about titles.

“Jessika! What’s going on?”

She looked curiously at Finn for a moment, before remembering whatever had her in such a hurry, and turning back to Poe.

“We need you at the stables. Now.”

Poe seemed torn, but Jessika looked deadly serious. He relented and called over another man.

“Brance! Come here!”

A man walked calmly toward them, bowing slightly.

“Duke Dameron?”

Poe clapped his hand on Finn’s shoulder, and handed him the broad sword, which Finn took more by reflex than anything else.

“I have to go take care of something, but Finn here needs to start training with this sword. Can you take care of him?”

Brance smiled and nodded once.

“Of course, Duke, it would be my pleasure.”

Poe clapped Finn’s shoulder once more, telling him he’d come back to pick him up when he was done. With one last look over his shoulder, he left the arena with Jessika.

When Finn looked back at Brance, the man was sizing him up, before looking him in the eyes.

“You’ve ever used one of these?”

Finn swallowed nervously.

“No, I’ve only ever fought with this.” He gestured with the hand still holding the smaller blade. Brance looked down at it, eyes squinting slightly in disgust and nodded.

“Well, put those things down in a corner, and let’s see what we can do with you.”

Finn had spent most of his life dealing with the Knights stringent training regime, spending days on end improving his fighting skills with little time for sleep or sustenance. He could honestly say he never had the chance to train with a full and comfortable night sleep and a satisfied stomach the way he did now.

He also never trained with blunted training weapons, so that was definitely an improvement.

He hadn’t used a sword since he ran away from the Knights, but his body quickly remembered the familiar motions. The more complicated part was to change the reflexes he had acquired through over a decade of endless training to adapt his fighting style to the new weapon he had been given.

Most of the day consisted of him being knocked down to the floor because he attempted a move that would have worked fine with a smaller sword, with his opponent easily side stepping the much slower attack. Still, he jumped back to his feet every time, eager to prove his worth to the people that had taken him in. To Poe.

He couldn’t tell anyone how much time had passed. He only knew that at some point Brance asked another fighter to take his place, now standing closer to Finn to comment on his technique as he fought. Then the second fighter switched with a third, then a fourth. All of them managed to take Finn down with varying levels of ease, but they all ultimately gave up in front of Finn’s apparently endless stamina.

Finn was now fighting his fifth swordsman of the day, and finally, finally managed to disarm the other and knock him down.

Suddenly, the almost trance like state that had fallen over him in the last few hours lifted, and he noticed several things.

First, he was tired, muscles screaming at him to take a pause.

Second, as he let go of the sword, and let himself slip to the floor, he was starving.

Third, Brance was looking at him with respect in his eyes, something he had never seen anyone direct toward him before.

And fourth, people were clapping and whooping.

When he mustered the energy to look toward the door, he saw Poe and Rey standing there with a few people he’d never seen before. His two friends smiled and moved toward him, each grasping one of his arm, and tugging him to his feet. Poe slapped his shoulder, than steadied him as the movement sent him wobbling. This close, Finn could count the laughter lines around his eyes.

“See, told you you’d take to the new sword wonderfully!”

Finn frowned at him.

“I think you’re setting the bar pretty low there.”

Poe shook his head, and moved him toward the door, while Rey flicked his ear.

“Nope, not happening, that was amazing, and you should be proud.”

Rey pipped in, jumping ahead and walking backward to look him in the face.

“That was pretty great! I’d never seen you move like that, Finn, you looked-“

She seemed at lost for words there, and Poe happily jumped back in.

“Badass? Dashing? Confident? Knightly?”

She glared good-naturally at Poe and turned back to Finn.

“Like you fit here.”

Poe nodded eagerly.

“Come on, let’s get something to eat, I can hear your stomach growling from here!”

“What time is it?”

Rey seemed as unsure about that as he was, but Finn didn’t think she left the forge all day, not until Poe came to get her. It was one of the other people, the woman that came to get Poe earlier, Jessika, who answered.

“It’s after 5. Right on time for dinner!”

They made their way to a new mess hall, much larger with a lot more tables. A lot of people were already eating there, but a table in the back was empty. Poe lead them there, and they all settled down, Finn and Rey sitting down heavily, leaning a bit on each other for support. Poe was on the other side of Finn, the rest taking the remainder of the space.

Poe waved to the two others in front of them.

“Finn, Rey, this is Temmin Wexley, or Snap, and this is Jessika Pava. Jess, Snap, these are Finn and Rey.”

Snap nodded politely, but Jessika was leaning forward, eyes curious and slightly too bright.

“So you’re the dashing knight who saved Dameron’s ass.”

It wasn’t even phrased as a question, but Finn felt himself nodding anyway. He wasn’t really used to this sort of language; even the people of the Lower City made efforts around Rey, manners keeping them from swearing in front of a woman.

“I’m not a knight, though.”

She waved him off, and kept going.

“So, did you really fight off a hundred Troopers just to get to Poe, and twice as many to get out?”

“What? Of course not! There weren’t that many Troopers in the region in general, let alone at that camp!” When he looked back at Poe, the man was blushing and avoiding his eyes.

“Did you at least tell Kylo Ren to go fuck himself?”

“No, that was Poe.” At that, Snap leaned over the table and slapped Poe gently on the top of the head, with a grunted “Idiot.”

Rey and Finn shared a look, a bit taken aback by this cavalier way of treating nobility.

“But you did make sure the Knights were following you when you split up, and not Poe?”

Finn shrugged.

“Well, yeah, but that’s nothing.”

Poe frowned at him, and knocked his ankle lightly. Jessika snorted, waving a piece of bread in his direction.

“Yeah, nothing, you mean the only thing that kept him alive until we could find him!”

Finn shrugged.

“Yeah, but it’s nothing like beating up three hundreds Troopers or standing up to Kylo Ren.”

Snap snorted.

“First lesson of Poe Dameron. He lies about his stories, all the time.”

Poe leaned back, putting his hand over his heart.

“I embellish!”

Jessika glared at him.

“He lies.”

That seemed to be it for this discussion, and Jessica drew Rey in a conversation about the cavalry equipment, and how the smith could potentially help improve it.

That night, after another warm bath, and Finn could really see himself get used to this, he fell directly into bed after a quick goodnight to Poe and Rey.

 

OOOOOOOOOO

 

Finn heard a door open and suddenly the door to his room, which he apparently forgot to close completely the day before, slammed open. He jerked up and found himself staring in the face of a dog.

A small dog, that was currently inspecting him thoroughly, sticking its nose everywhere, from his underarm to his chest, or lastly into his face.

Apparently satisfied, it started liking Finn’s face, and the man stayed frozen, trying to process the situation through his sleep addled brain.

Thank god, Poe, who must have heard the commotion from his room, ran in, and groaned.

“Baby!”

He strode forward and grabbed the dog who whined mournfully as it couldn’t lick Finn anymore. Poe cradled it to his chest, scolding it with a tone of voice that negated any impact his words might have had.

Finn stayed frozen for a long moment, waiting for his head to start working again. Which, ultimately ended up a mistake, because the first thought his brain did for him was telling him that there was a shirtless and sleep-frumpy Poe standing in his room cuddling one of the cutest dog Finn had ever seen.

Finn’s heart started doing weird acrobatics he didn’t even know were possible, and he forced himself to clear his throat.

“Good morning.”

Poe suddenly seemed to register the whole situation as well, and Finn thanked the gods he wasn’t the only one barely awake.

“Right back at you, buddy. I’m just gonna- I’m gonna leave you get ready. Or you know, go back to sleep if you want. Terribly sorry about this.”

By the end, he was blushing, and he almost ran out of the room, still holding the dog. Finn was only alone for a second, pushing himself into a full sitting position, before Rey’s head popped in.

“Did Poe just run out of your room with a dog in his arms?”

“I think so?”

She looked into the hallway, presumably at Poe’s door, then back at him, squinting her eyes.

“Was he shirtless?”

Finn could only clear his throat and look away, embarrassed but not knowing why. Rey simply giggled at went back to her room. Deciding that since they were all awake anyway, he might as well get up. He got dressed, thanking the gods that his covers had still been in place when Poe came in, that could have been even more embarrassing. Both him and Rey had seen each other in various state of undress, and hadn’t cared either way, but he felt the urge to be more respectable around Poe.

Rey was already waiting in the living room, reading a book, curled in one of the armchair, and Finn sat on the loveseat next to her. She gave him a short considering look, but apparently decided he didn’t know any more than her, and went back to her book.

Finn was immensely thankful, Rey’s interrogations were things of legend.

When Poe’s door finally opened, they heard the dog run toward them. The little orange and white fur ball went to press itself in front of Rey’s arm chair, nudging her thigh and begging for her to pet it. She relented quickly, and it closed its eyes in bless as she scratched behind its ears.

Finn heard Poe walk over, and looked up as he came in view, now fully clothed. Finn felt a twist of disappointment, but couldn’t understand why. Poe gave him a wry smile, rubbing the back of his head.

“Sorry about him. I asked Jessika to watch over him while you two got settled in, and she apparently decided it had been long enough.”

Finn gave him a reassuring smile, and gestured over the free space beside him. Poe sat down with a warm smile.

“It’s yours?”

“Yeah, he is. I found him roaming around the Market a few years ago. Poor thing was only skin and bones, and it was still the sweetest dog I’d ever met.” His voice was so fond, Finn felt his own heart squeeze, and turned to look at the dog, who had managed to find his way to Rey’s lap.

“Baby?”

Poe snorted.

“I kept calling him things like ‘you poor baby’, and suddenly he wouldn’t answer to anything else.”

Finn chuckled.

“Yeah, I know, not my smartest move. It makes it kind of difficult to sound angry when you try to scold him.”

Rey raised her head, and mock glared at Poe.

“Why would you ever scold this perfect angel?”

Finn and Poe laughed.

“Well, when he decides to attack my guests, I have to do something!”

Rey shook her head, rubbing Baby’s belly.

“It’s Finn’s fault, he should have closed his door properly.”

Finn groaned.

“I didn’t know puppy attacks were a possibility!”

Poe settled down against the arm rest, looking at the three of them with a soft smile. His new sitting position pressed his thigh against Finn’s. The young man did his best not to stare at where they were touching, and instead focused on Rey and the dog.

They were mostly silent for a few beats, until Poe’s stomach growled, sending them all laughing. They moved to the private dining room, Baby in tow.

“The smith believes I should try and refine my designs for a while, keep working on knifes for at the moment.” Rey was talking excitedly, hand waving around to accentuate everything she was saying, nose scrunching. “You, know, since I don’t need to make them quick and multipurpose anymore. I told him I’d like to work on swords, but he thinks the best way to learn is to make great knifes first. So, I’m getting started today.”

She was beaming, and the two men assured her she would do great. Poe cocked his head.

“You know, I broke my favorite hunting knife recently, and I don’t really like my new one.”

Rey turned to him, going from bouncy to blade sharp in a second, sizing him up. Poe leaned back a bit, taken aback at her sudden mood change, but Finn simply smiled. The other man would learn Rey’s ways fast enough.

“It’s been a while since I’ve done a hunting knife, most people in town want kitchen knives or smaller blades.” She turned back to her food, but Finn could see she was already designing the blade in her head.

Poe looked at him with confused and slightly worried eyes, but Finn simply shrugged, happy to know more than Poe about something for the first time since they came to the palace.

“She always gets like that when she gets a project that really interests her.”

Poe seemed pleased at that explanation, and let it go. As soon as she was done with her last mouthful, Rey jumped to her feet and raced out of the room with barely a goodbye thrown over her shoulder.

“Okay, so this afternoon I have to train with the cavalry, but I thought we could use the morning to see how we can fight together.”

“Do I have to use the broad sword?”

Poe grinned wordlessly at him, and Finn sighed, pointing a finger at him.

“Okay, but don’t come crying when I cut off your hand.”

Poe threw his head back and laughed, standing up.

“I trust you completely, buddy.”

Finn barely stopped the ‘why’, from escaping his mouth, settling for following Poe to the arena. Brance was already there, and he looked over at them, already calling another man forward, apparently expecting to train Finn again.

However, Poe walked toward the wall, grabbing both the training broad sword Finn used the day before and a pair of slimmer blades. He gave the sword to Finn, and started to swirl the blades around so fast Finn had trouble keeping up.

When he saw Finn staring, Poe winked at him.

“I prefer to go for fast and sharp, personally.”

“Yeah, and almost getting his head cut off doing so. Your highness.”

Brance had moved toward, them, sending a questioning look at Poe. The man shrugged, almost nonchalantly.

“If he’s to be my bodyguard, we need to know how to fight together.”

Brance gave Poe a look that said a thousand things, of which Finn understood none, and turned back toward the man he summoned earlier.

“Of course, Duke.”

To Finn’s unending surprise, no one got maimed during the morning. Poe and he didn’t win every match, but they did have the upper hand a few times. They moved together naturally most of the time, Poe jumping forward to strike with his shorted blades while Finn covered him, and the few times they fell out of sync, Poe was quick enough to move out of the way of Finn’s blade.

After the first fight, like the day before, Brance stepped away to keep given advice to Finn. However, Finn still knew combat strategies, and was a good fighter in his own right. As he became more and more at ease with his new blade and the new possibilities and restrictions that came with it, he improved greatly.

So much so, that at some point, when their adversaries had managed to disarm Poe and ‘kill’ him, Finn managed to hold his own against the both of them long enough that his stamina became a determinant factor. They grew tired, and he was able to take them both down.

As soon as Brance called the match in his favor, Poe jumped up to him, hugging him tight.

“That was awesome!”

Finn allowed himself to smile back at Poe, before rubbing the back of his head.

“But you died.”

“So what, you kicked both their asses! On your own!” Poe scoffed.

“But I’m supposed to be your bodyguard. If you die, I’ve failed!”

Poe looked back at him, eyes suddenly serious. From the corner of his eyes, Finn saw the other fighters make themselves scarce.

“Finn, I would never have taken those risks if this wasn’t a friendly fight. I’m not stupid. This was about seeing what we can do together. And we’re pretty damn great. That’s all there is to it.”

Finn opened his mouth to protest again, but Poe stepped in front of him, hands on both of Finn’s shoulders.

“And even if I had died, it would have been because I made a stupid mistake. You wouldn’t have been to blame, you did absolutely nothing wrong. But you kept fighting, and you got yourself out. That’s good. That’s what you had to do.”

Finn had nothing to say to that, knowing Poe wouldn’t understand that his survival was the most important thing, no matter the situation. Poe had given him a new life, to him, and to Rey. And the Queen herself had tasked him to keep Poe safe. He couldn’t fail.

Finn kept quiet, and Poe seem to search for something in his eyes, before sighing and leaning forward. Finn’s heart stuttered, not knowing what was going to happen, but Poe simply pressed their foreheads together for a moment before pulling away.

“Come on, let’s eat. I need a moment to rest before this afternoon’s drills.

They went to the mess hall, and sat down at the same table as the day before. As soon as they were settled, Snap and Jess dragged Poe in a discussion about the afternoon’s training, while Finn listened. Rey didn’t show up, as expected, and Baby was nowhere in sight. When she saw him looking, Jess laughed and waved his concerns away.

“Baby does pretty much what he wants during the day. He’s probably off bugging the court or trying to swindle some food from the kitchens. Don’t worry about it, he usually shows up again during dinner.”

Finn nodded, and she went back to the discussion.

Finn decided to stay and watch Poe’s cavalry for the afternoon rather than go back to sword training. Firstly, because he think his arms might just fall off if he did, and secondly because he was really curious to see the cavalry that had the Knights of Ren cowering in fear, and whether or the legend of Duke Dameron was justified.

To the surprise of absolutely no one, of course it was.

Finn had received basic horseback riding lesson with the Knights, enough to stay on top of his mount while they moved.

Enough to know that there was no way he would ever be able to do half of what Poe could do while on his horse. He and the black mare he was riding seemed to be born to be together. At one point in the drill, Poe had completely let go of his reins to be able to use both of his swords to take down targets, and they both somehow dodged every obstacle and every rider of the opposite team, winning the play.

As good as Poe was as an individual rider, he was even better as a commander, easily moving his riders into flawless formations. All his soldiers respected him and obeyed without asking questions, even Jessika and Snap who hadn’t had any problem arguing with him in the mess. The cavalry was a well-oiled machine, and as a former member of the Knights of Ren, that wasn’t the kind of praise Finn gave easily.

Poe dismissed his riders at sunset, and Finn walked toward the barns. He stopped at the doors, intimidated by all the riders and squires running around until Jess appeared out of nowhere, elbowing him.

“Last stall in the back, can’t miss him.”

She was still looking at him, so he didn’t have a choice but to go, despite feeling awfully out of place. Poe was already brushing his mare, whispering sweet nothings to her as he worked. The horse raised her head as Finn approached, but quickly went back to munching on her hay. Poe didn’t seem to notice, so Finn leaned on the door, trying to look casual, and not star struck.

“Don’t you have squires to take care of that?”

Poe’s head snapped in his direction, and beamed at him. His hair was wet and sticking to his forehead, like he had stuck his head in a bucket of water recently. He shrugged.

“Sure, but I like doing it myself. That way I know what’s going on with her all the time. A squire might not notice the little things, so, you know.”

Finn didn’t know, but his rapports with horses, or animals in general had always been purely utilitarian, so he chose to believe Poe.

“So what did you think of the drill?”

“It was amazing! I’d never seen anything like this! You’re one hell of a rider.”

Poe looked thrilled that Finn appreciated his skills, and even blushed at bit before turning back to his mare.

“You need help?” Finn couldn’t help but feel a bit useless, hanging around watching Poe while the man worked.

Poe, however, shook his head with another brilliant smile.

“Nope, don’t worry about it buddy, I’m almost done.”

Which meant that Finn had nothing else to do but to watch as Poe took care of his mare, and he couldn’t keep his gaze from slipping to his chest where the sweat and water had stuck the fabric of his shirt to his skin. Finn suddenly remembered the glimpse of bare skin he had that morning, when Poe had run into his room.

Still staring at Poe’s chest, Finn felt like his body was being lit in fire slowly and now he wanted nothing more to step closer to Poe, much closer, and-

Poe shifted, breaking Finn out of his reverie, and the young man barely had time to bring his eyes back up before Poe caught him staring at his chest. Poe smiled at him, unaware.

“All done! Want to grab something to eat?”

Finn wasn’t especially hungry, but Poe seemed to be, and Rey would probably show up at some point too. He nodded, and Poe led the way, apparently not noticing the weird mood that had fallen over Finn. By the time they were seated at the mess hall table, Rey had emerged from the forge, dusty and grimy but thrilled, announcing to Poe he should have a badass hunting knife shortly, and between her and Jessika and Poe, there was too much excitement and laughter for Finn to keep mulling over his weird moment at the stables, and he forgot about it.

That night, Poe claimed the first bath, stating that horse smell took precedence over everything else, leaving Finn and Rey alone for the first time since they came to the palace. Rey grabbed Finn’s hand and sat him on the love seat, right beside her.

“I’m so sorry I left you alone like that the last few days, it’s just-“

Finn frowned at her, and she stopped, sheepish.

“You didn’t leave me alone, I was with Poe most of the time. I’m just really glad you’re enjoying yourself.”

Rey smiled at him, nodding eagerly.

“It’s amazing. The forge is great and the people are so nice. At least five people gave me advice today, without me even needing to ask, and then asked me questions about their own things! I’m so happy they think I’m good enough.” She stopped for a second, looking toward the hallway before turning back to Finn with an expression he couldn’t understand. “Poe is pretty great too.”

For a second, Finn felt a jolt of _something,_ a weird mix of fear, jealousy and sadness. He didn’t even think before asking her “Yeah? Do you like him?”

Rey cocked her head, considering the question. Rey wasn’t one to bestow her affection easily or freely.

“Yes, I like him.”

Finn forced himself to smile and prod further.

“Do you like… like him?”

Rey was taken aback for a second, until her eyes popped in realisation, and finally she frowned at him, slapping his arm gently.

“Of course not! You know I don’t want those things!”

Finn nodded, impossibly relieved, and he relaxed against the cushions. He couldn’t even understand why he reacted so strongly. The crush he had had on Rey was long gone, ever since she sat him down and explained that she didn’t feel that way for him, and would never, neither him nor anyone else. He knew that, but he also thought that if anyone would have been able to change her mind, it would have been Poe.

She leaned forward, to look into his eyes.

“Are you doing well, Finn? Are you happy?”

Finn couldn’t tell if he was happy. He didn’t really know what happy meant.

“I don’t know? I mean, I feel safe here, I know the Knights won’t reach me? And you’re happy, so that makes me feel good. And I have something to do, I can be useful. I have good food, and a comfortable bed, and then there’s Baby. And Poe. Poe’s pretty great too.”

Rey smiled at him and squeezed his hand.

“Sounds to me like you’re pretty happy, Finn.”

“Which is exactly as it should be!”

Poe had come back without them noticing and he gestured with exaggerated flourish toward the bathroom.

“The room is all yours, Milady.”

Rey, giggled and got to her feet, squeezing Finn shoulder as she passed. Poe took her place, sprawling with an easy grace. Finn forced himself not to look at the sliver of Poe’s abdomen peeking from under his shirt, and found Poe looking back at him with a weird expression.

“Hey Finn? I think you’re pretty great too.”

Finn beamed at him, and for a while, they simply stared at each other, smiling.

Until Baby decided that their silence meant they should pay attention to him instead.

By the time Rey got out of the bathroom, Poe and Finn were seated on the floor on both end of the living room, throwing a ball back and forth, as Baby ran around, trying to catch it before they could. Poe was really good at throwing his low but fast, and Finn was getting the hang of getting his throws to bounce several times on the floor before they reached Poe, the both of them just close enough to Baby’s reach to give the poor dog hopes to win the game.

Finn let Rey take his place as he went to scrub the grime of the day before. When he got out, even Poe had gone to bed. He stood in the middle of the room for a moment, eyes closed and body relaxed, breathing in and out, enjoying the silence, before he put out all the candles and turned back to his room. As he slipped in bed, he realised he hadn’t gotten any nightmare since he got to the castle.


	3. Chapter 3

Finn felt his flesh sizzle and he twisted violently, struggling to wrench himself out of the restraints binding him to the chair. Phasma barked at him, and tightened the leather cuffs even more. Finn yelled at her, telling her to go fuck herself. She sneered and slapped him so hard he saw stars explode in front of his eyes. The other Trooper holding the white hot brand on his torso was laughing maniacally. Finn gasped and started yelling, begging to get away from the pain, please, please stop, please-

“Finn! FINN!”

He jerked awake, instinctively slapping away the hand shaking him awake, crawling away until his back hit the wall. His eyes were jumping wildly all around the room, looking for a threat.

He remembered there had been someone on the bed when he woke up, and he threw up his arms to defend himself against the intruder. His head was spinning, his breathing shuddery and panicked.

“Finn?”

He knew that voice, he knew that voice. He knew that name. Was that his name? Yes, he was pretty sure that was his name. The Knights never called him Finn.

He got his name after he ran away from the Knights.

“Finn, can you look at me, please?”

The voice was soft and pleading, and Finn swallowed. He knew that voice. He knew that name. Where did he get that name? The Knights didn’t give it to him, they didn’t give name to anyone. Where did he get that name?

Poe.

Poe gave him the name. The voice belonged to Poe. Poe was safe.

“Finn?”

Slowly, he lowered his arms, heartbeat slowly settling down. He felt as if he had just sprinted a mile, covered in sweat and out of breathe. Poe was sitting at the edge of the bed, not daring get closer to Finn just yet. Finn didn’t know if it was because he was scared for him or of him.

The thought of Poe being scared of him hurt him more than he had thought possible.

“It’s okay, I’m fine.” His voice was rough, hoarse.

Poe’s expression was unreadable in the darkness, but Finn could guess that he looked skeptical.

“Can I come closer?”

Finn nodded quickly, leaning in Poe’s direction as the other man moved toward him. Poe pushed him gently aside until Finn scooted over, and he climbed on the bed, pressing himself against Finn, wrapping an arm around the darker man’s shoulders. For a moment they kept silent, Poe rubbing his thumbs against Finn’s arms while the younger man tried to absorb as much of Poe’s warmth as he could.

“I’m sorry.”

Finn didn’t have the will to speak, and simply hummed back.

“That this happened to you. That they hurt you like that.”

Finn huffed and pressed himself closer to Poe, his head falling to the other man’s shoulder.

“Not your fault.”

Poe tightened his hold on Finn’s shoulders.

“Maybe not, but they sure as hell aren’t going to fucking apologize to you.” He was growling, and Finn could _feel_ the vibrations in his own torso.

Suddenly he realised that both Poe and himself were bare-chested and cuddling in Finn’s bed. The new, strange sensation chased away the shivers of the nightmare. Every inch of Poe’s skin pressed to his now felt like fire against him, but instead of the all-consuming painful inferno of his nightmare, he wanted more of it. He wanted to turn so that they were face to face, he wanted to climb in Poe’s lap.

He wanted to push and push until there wasn’t a wisp of air between them, until he could feel this fire everywhere, everywhere.

“Finn?”

The air in the room was definitely way too hot all of the sudden, and when he forced himself to look up to Poe’s face, if only to reassure him, he found his face only a few inches away from his.

They stayed frozen like that for a few moments, Finn cursing the darkness of the room that was keeping him from reading Poe’s expression.

He didn’t know what was happening to him, didn’t know what to do about it, the only thing he knew was that he _needed_ to get closer to Poe.

He found himself leaning forward, acting purely on instinct. The darkness made it hard to tell, but he was pretty sure Poe was doing the same.

Until Poe jerked back, staring at Finn with wide eyes, shaking his head as if trying to scramble his thoughts back in order. Finn opened his mouth to ask him what was wrong, but Poe jumped out of bed, raking his hands through his hair.

“Are you feeling better?”

If Finn were to be honest, he had almost forgotten about the nightmares, and he simply nodded, dumbfounded. Poe smiled in a way that looked distinctly less warm and joyful than usual.

“Good, that’s good. You should try to go back to sleep. I’ll see you tomorrow.”

He raced out of the room. Finn had no other choice but to lay back down and hope that he could fall back asleep, but he wasn’t overly enthusiastic about his chances. He closed his eyes, sighing deeply.

 

When he opened his eyes again, light was streaming through the window. Finn groaned and shifted.

He froze.

All his muscles locked, and he could barely breath, panic crawling up his throat.

He was hard.

Oh gods, he was hard.

He started shaking, pressing his eyes closed, willing his erection to disappear, before anyone could see it. He was pretty sure the people of the palace wouldn’t whip him for having an erection, but he couldn’t imagine it being a good thing.

Erections were a distraction, a danger, a disgrace.

What if Poe walked in?

A lightning hot feeling ran through him at the thought of Poe walking in right now, and he got even harder.

Finn whined in horror and curled around himself. He started thinking about the most awful things he could remember, from Phasma to cleaning the latrines back at the Knights’ camp. Slowly, far too slowly, his penis got soft again, and Finn started breathing again.

He flopped on his back, staring at his ceiling as the horror of his situation sank in.

He wanted Poe. He _wanted_ Poe. Oh gods. He was going to be whipped, he was going to be executed, he was going to be _banished._

Desire was prohibited, was a defect. Finn couldn’t desire, it interfered with his function. Desire was to be repressed.

It had been years since Finn had had an erection, ever since they had been forced to witness the whipping of a Trooper caught touching himself.

Oh gods, why did he want again? Why did he want now? Why did he want _Poe_?

Desire was a disgrace. Desire for a man was a _sin_.

Oh god. He wanted _Poe._ The man who had given him everything, without a second thought, the man that took him and Rey in from the goodness of his heart. The man who trusted Finn enough to let him sleep in the room next to his.

It had been bad enough when it had been Rey. He wasn’t supposed to have crushes on anyone, let alone someone from outside of the Knights, but at least he hadn’t _desired_ Rey on top of it.

Oh gods, did he have a crush on Poe?

He remembered the fuzzy feelings he would get when Poe was around, and how he wanted Poe to smile and laugh all the time, and oh gods he had a crush on Poe.

Poe who’s amazing and beautiful, and nice and smart and good and how did Finn not notice this sooner?

How could he do that to Poe? How could he repay him by lusting after him, by wanting even more from him?

There was a knock on the door, and Finn jerked in sitting position, dragging up the covers up to cover himself.

He pleaded silently for it to be anybody but Poe, and immediately felt guilt crush him again. How could he think that after everything Poe did for him?

“Finn?”

He deflated when he heard Rey’s voice, flopping back on the bed.

“Come in.”

She stepped in, closing the door behind her. She sat at the edge of the bed, concerned.

“Poe had to leave early, but he told me you had a nightmare last night.”

Finn snorted. The nightmare was so far on the list of things bothering him at the moment.

“It was fine, the same one about branding. Poe’s just not used to it yet.”

Rey bit her lips and nodded slowly. Both of them got nightmares, and after sleeping in the same room for months, they didn’t wake up anymore when the other started trashing around unless they got really loud. Now, with a stone wall separating them, Finn would have been more surprised if his screaming _had_ woken Rey.

The woman inspected him nonetheless.

“So what’s bothering you, then?”

Finn silently cursed her sensitivity, and smiled self-deprecatingly, trying to reassure her.

“It’s nothing, I’m just tired. You know how I get after a nightmare.”

Rey cocked her head, and swung her legs so she was sitting fully on the bed, leaning forward.

“Don’t lie to me, Finn. What’s going on?”

He looked away, clearing his throat.

“It doesn’t matter, Rey.”

“Of course it matters.”

“It’s not a matter of life or death, it’s just my stupid head making a mess as usual.”

She sighed, and grabbed his hands.

“I’m your best friend, Finn. Dealing with your stupid head’s messes is kind of my job.”

Finn glared at the wall.

“Finn, what’s going on? Did someone say something to you? Did someone bother you?”

He shook his head vehemently. The last thing he needed was Rey going on the warpath to avenge an offense that never happened.

Rey shook his hands softly.

“Then what happened?”

He sighed.

“Poe.”

Rey’s eyebrows jumped to her hairline, and her voice was incredulous.

“Poe? What do you mean, Poe? Was he mean to you? _Poe_?”

Finn was grateful she sounded so disbelieving. The last thing he wanted was to turn her against Poe.

“No, no, he’s great. He’s awesome, that’s kind of th- You remember when we met?”

Rey frowned, confused.

“Of course I remember when we met? What does it have to do with Poe? I mean, beside the whole kidnapping-escape thing.”

Finn winced, rubbing the back of his head.

“No, no, not- Gods. You know, when I was, you know, with you, and all…”

Rey cocked her head.

“You mean when you had that crush on me? Yes, I do, why d- Oh my god you have a crush on Poe.”

She didn’t even bother phrasing it as a question, staring at him with wide eyes. She didn’t seem disgusted at the thought, however, so Finn pushed forward.

“Yes? I think so? I mean I don’t know, maybe I’m wrong, I’d love to be wrong, but gods, he’s so, SO, and he came last night to help me with my nightmare, and he’s nice, and he was warm, and this morning I-“

“Whoa there!” Rey interrupted him, throwing both hands up. “I’m all for the fluffy stuff, but I don’t want to know what you did this morning!”

“I didn’t do anything this morning! But I _wanted_ to!” He curled forward, grabbing his head with both hands, voice breaking. “Gods, Rey, what I am going to do?” His voice was barely a whisper at the end.

Rey grabbed both of his hands away, forcing him to look at her face.

“Hey, hey, what’s going on? Why are you like that?”

“What am I going to do? I’m already defective enough, Rey! What am I going to _do_?”

Rey was starting to look a bit frantic, letting go of his hands to grab his shoulders.

“Defective? What are talking about, defective? For liking Poe?”

Finn nodded, hands trembling.

“For leaving the Knights, for liking you, for _wanting Poe._ I want a _man,_ Rey. I’m disgusting. Oh gods, they’ll throw me out, they’ll put me in jail.”

“FINN.”

He stopped, short of breath, staring at Rey.

“There’s nothing wrong with liking men, Finn.”

He frowned at her, confused.

“Liking men is the sign of the deepest depravity. It’s an offense of the gravest kind toward the object of your impure thoughts, and everyone who condone it shall be sent to hell.”

It hurt, saying it. It hurt thinking that he could have mistreated Poe in such a way, it hurt that he had become such a monster.

Rey shook him, eyes flaming.

“That’s the Knights talking Finn! You are not depraved, you are not going to hell, and you did nothing wrong.”

“Rey-“

“When have the Knights EVER been right? When? Is there anything they’ve ever told you that ended up being right once you got out?”

Finn was staring at her, unable to talk, because nothing had. Everything they had told him had turned out so wrong, Finn was stunned he had believed it at any point. Rey smiled softly at him, rubbing his shoulders.

“There is nothing wrong with liking a man. There’s certainly nothing wrong with liking Poe. Most of the castle does, man, female, and everything in between.”

Finn shook his head, not wanting to deal with that information while he was barely getting started on the whole, ‘liking men is not prohibited’ part of his morning. Rey sighed, and tugged on his shoulders.

“Come on, let’s get something to eat, it can only help.”

He followed wordlessly, still pondering.

Sword training came as a blessing that day, forcing his thoughts away from Poe, at the risk of gaining bad bruises.

By the time he got to the mess hall, by himself and only getting lost once, he was feeling a little bit more like himself.

After all, the Knights were assholes, and so far, acting exactly the opposite way they had taught him to had brought him nothing but satisfaction.

Why would this be any different?

Poe was still the same that night, smiling widely at Finn when he sat down, and Finn found himself answering in kind. Apparently satisfied, the man turned back toward Jess, gesticulating animatedly. Finn stopped himself from staring, looking back at his food.

Yes, he had a crush on Poe.

Maybe that wasn’t the disastrous thing he had been raised to believe it was.

However, as he watched Poe laugh and talk, so comfortable in this room with these people, he knew he could never tell Poe. This, this ease, this warmth, was more important. Finn’s feelings might not be evil, but Poe would never share them. How could be? How could Poe, amazing, noble, charming Poe ever want someone like Finn?

Finn wasn’t sure he was even worthy of his friendship yet.

Poe laughed again, and Finn felt his heart skip a bit. How did he not realise before? One more reason Poe would never want him. He’d want someone that knew what was going on.

Poe wanted, for some reason, for Finn to be his friend, and he needed him to be his bodyguard. Finn would do his best to be both, and that would have to be enough.

That was fine. Why wouldn’t it be?

 

OOOOOOOOOO

 

The next day the Queen received news of some Knights of Ren supporters creating trouble again, and the cavalry was sent to take care of it, leaving Rey and Finn at the castle without any of their new friends.

Finn had wanted to go with them, but his lack of skills at horseback riding meant he wouldn’t have been of much use, and Poe gently told him to stay put, that he would be fine, and that he would come back.

Finn couldn’t help but remember the circumstance in which Poe and himself met, and think that the promise wasn’t very reassuring. He did his best to keep a straight face as Poe spoke, but he must have slipped as the man turned around, because Jessika and Snap cornered him shortly afterward.

“Don’t worry, we’ll make sure he comes back in one piece.” Snap was solemn, and Finn felt relieved. He couldn’t help but wonder at the level of trust he had for a man he had only known a few days. Jessika, on the other hand, scoffed and clapped his shoulder hard.

“Gods know his Highness the Duke wouldn’t have gotten this far without us watching for his pretty ass. Don’t worry, Finn, we know how to handle him.”

Rey stood beside him as they watched the cavalry leave, but Finn was convinced that was mostly so she could drag him away, and keep him from worrying the rest of the day away.

She dropped him off at the arena, where Brance took only one look at him and called forward his best fighter, a dark skinned woman, and the only one that hadn’t yet fought against Finn, probably out of respect for the younger man’s ego. She introduced herself as Korr and Finn smiled as they took their stances.

Now that Finn was slowly starting to get the hang of his new weapon, his combat style shifted from ‘oh gods please let me not make too much of a fool of myself’, and into ‘I might just be able to do something with this’.

Without much surprise, Korr wiped the floor with him, but as she helped him back to his feet with a friendly smile, Finn actually knew where he had failed. When Brance and he discussed how to improve, he was able to contribute to the discussion, rather than listen dejectedly.

Of course, he didn’t come even remotely close to taking Korr down, but when they switched to some of the less experienced fighters, Finn was able to defeat a fair amount of them, and at the end of the day, despite the weariness of his muscles, Finn couldn’t help but bounce around, smile wide and relaxed. He finally felt like he was improving rather than simply floundering. Brance gave him a look that wanted to be exasperated but didn’t quite succeed, and left shaking his head. Korr joined Finn as he put away his weapon.

“Don’t pay attention to Brance, he thinks he has an image to maintain.”

Finn simply laughed.

“Trust me, I’ve had teachers with far worse temperaments.”

She smiled a bit at that, but it was chased away quickly by a pondering expression, like she wanted to ask something, but wasn’t sure if she should. Finn smiled encouragingly, cocking his head to the side. That seemed to convince her, and she took a deep breathe.

“You were a Trooper, right? For the Knights of Ren?”

All of Finn’s muscles contracted, and he took an instinctual step back, already expecting her to freak out. However, she threw both her hands up, to show she meant no harm, mouth twisting apologetically.

“No, don’t worry! It’s the Queen that told me about it, I swear it’s fine.”

Finn watched her for a few more beats, but he chose to believe her. She really didn’t look bothered by him, and if she really had wanted to give him grief over his past, she would have questioned him in front of everyone sooner, not when they were alone.

He relaxed slightly.

“Yes, I was.”

She smiled kindly at him, relieved that the tension was ebbing away.

“I was wondering if you would consider meeting with me and a few other of the Queen’s strategists to talk about it? I really don’t want to make you uncomfortable, or force you to relive bad experiences, but it’s the first time anyone leaves the Knights of Ren and lives to tell the tale.”

There was something like admiration in her eyes and her voice as she spoke, and Finn didn’t quite know what to do with himself. He looked away, rubbing the back of his head.

“It’s not that big of a deal.”

She frowned at him, and leaned forward.

“Not that big of a deal? You threw away decades of conditioning and brainwashing when you even begun to consider that what the Knights were doing was wrong, and then you had to take the decision to leave, actually take the actions to do so. And when all that was said and done, you also decided to free the prisoner you knew nothing about, despite the fact that you _must_ have known it would make your escape, your life more difficult.”

She cocked her head, as if waiting for him to talk, to argue, but Finn found he couldn’t. She had done nothing but state facts, and facts Finn couldn’t argue with. Korr gave him a kind smile.

“What you did, was nothing short of extraordinary, Finn. I know it’s hard to accept, but that’s the truth. Think on what I said. All of it. You don’t have to do anything, but think about it. The choice is yours.”

She smiled one more time, and left the room. Finn stood in the middle of the arena for a long time, playing Korr’s words over and over again in his head, trying to make sense of them, to absorb them.

He and Rey dinned in the private dining room that night, not really up for braving the mess hall without the rest of their friends to act as buffer. They were joined by Baby, who hadn’t been allowed to join the cavalry either, and between Rey’s happy talk about her recent exploits at the forge, and Baby’s forceful cuddliness, Finn was forced to pay attention and stay out of his own head.

Later that night, however, Rey and he curled up in a love seat, while Baby fell asleep in an arm chair.

“A woman came to talk to me today. She’d like me to talk with the strategist about the Knights.”

Rey hummed and grabbed his hand, lacing their fingers.

“That makes sense. You’re probably one of the first people they’ve met that got out.”

Finn snorted, and shook his head.

“I can’t be the first one to get out, I’m not that- I’m not that special.”

Rey pinched the skin on the back of his hand, and glared at him.

“First to leave, maybe not. First one to make it to D’Qar, without being killed by the Knights? I’ve never heard of such a thing.”

Finn couldn’t help but smile at her vehemence, ducking his head.

“Korr said something like that, too.”

Rey straightened up, smirking.

“Then why would she have said that if it wasn’t true?”

Finn shrugged, and Rey grabbed him by the neck, dragging him forward to kiss his forehead. She released him just far enough to look him straight in the eyes. Rey was always intense, but now she seemed to drill into Finn’s soul.

“You are one of the bravest, kindest, greatest person I know, and I have met the Queen.” Finn snorted, and Rey let him go, falling back against the armrest, satisfied.

“Are you going to do it, then?”

Finn shrugged a little.

“I don’t know. Probably? I don’t know if I really know something that useful, I was just a grunt, but yeah. I just. Yeah, I think I will.”

Rey cocked her head.

“You don’t have to.”

“I know. But it might help. And I want to help.”

Rey nodded, eyes solemn.

“Do you want me to come with you?”

Finn smiled gratefully at her, nodding enthusiastically. He was so relieved that she didn’t make him ask for it. That she offered it like it was a given.

“Alright. I can’t tomorrow, I have to finish the hunting knife project for Poe, but the day after, I’d be available?”

Finn almost said no, almost protested that it was too soon, but he swallowed all his protests, shaking his head to try and clear it. He had said he was going to do it, there was no sense in delaying.

“Yeah, would be okay.”

“Great, then that’s settled. We should get to bed.”

Rey got to her feet, grabbing Baby and walked to the hallway. Finn frowned at her.

“What are you doing?”

Rey grinned over her shoulder.

“He’s used to sleeping with Poe, poor thing, I can’t just leave it alone, now can I?”

 

OOOOOOOOOO

 

The next day, when he got to the training arena, Brance had everyone gathered around him. Finn quietly walked to stand next to Korr. She gave him an inquiring look that clearly asked ‘how are you?’ and he gave her a reassuring smile. Satisfied, she turned back to Brance, and Finn did the same.

“You’ve all done good progress lately, so I’ve decided that today, we would do a little tournament.”

Everyone cheered at that, even Korr, but Finn frowned. Sensing his confusion, the woman leaned closer to him.

“Brance will separate everyone into pairs. The winners will then be paired against other winners, and on and on until the two last ones standing fight to determine who’s the best fighter here.”

Finn nodded, and gave her a look at the corner of his eyes.

“Who won last time?”

The smug smile she gave him was the only answer he needed. Brance called him over, and slapped him on the shoulder, leading him to his adversary.

“Don’t worry about winning, kid. Just do your best, it’ll be fine.”

Finn knew he only wanted to reassure him, that he didn’t want to pressure him, but suddenly, all Finn wanted to do was to win, to prove to Brance that he could, that he shouldn’t take for granted that Finn wouldn’t make it.

He simply nodded. As he took his place in front of his first opponent, he couldn’t help but notice it was one of the other weaker fighters, someone Finn had already defeated a few times. He took a deep breathe, and fell into position.

He would to this.

The first fight was over quickly, Finn disarming the other man in a few moves. He was the first one done, and he felt Brance’s gaze on him. When he looked at him, the other man had turned away, walking away toward another fight.

The second fight was similar, Brance pairing him with the weaker of those remaining. Finn almost sneered, and pounced the second the signal was given, and his opponent actually backed down, eyes wide, not expecting Finn to be so forward.

After that, it didn’t even last a minute, and this time, when Finn turned back toward Brance, the man was watching him with considering eyes. Finn squared his shoulders, jutting his chin forward, holding his stare. Brance’s mouth slowly stretched into a grin, and he looked away as another fight was slowly turning dirty.

From that moment on, Brance stopped coddling Finn. Admittedly, most of the weakest fighters had been weeded out, but Brance didn’t automatically pitch him against the easiest opponent.

Despite that, Finn kept winning. The fights were getting longer and harder, and Finn was enjoying himself more and more. He discovered that the different training he got with the Knights actually helped him, giving him a repertoire of moves the rest of the fighters weren’t expecting, and didn’t know how to block.

After a while, Finn got to a fight that had him breathless and beaming, his opponent giving him almost as good as he got, but with an unexpected feint, Finn managed to unbalance him, and throw him on the floor, the blunted point of his sword nestled against the man’s throat.

There was a beat of silence and the other man burst out laughing, raising his arm for Finn to get him to his feet. He slapped Finn on the back, beaming.

“You’re something else, man.”

Suddenly, Finn realised that almost all the other fighters were lined on the sides, talking amongst themselves or watching the other fights. In fact, there was only one other person with him in the arena, outside of Brance.

Korr was watching him with a small smile, whirling her own sword around. Finn took a deep breathe, and walked over to her. Brance looked at them, like he was expecting them to start shit talking, but they both were too focused, trying to determine whether the other had been hurt in any way, some weakness they might be able to use.

Brance chuckled, and clapped his hands to indicate the start of the fight.

The fight was brutal. Finn and Korr had fought just the day before, but where Finn had previously been trying to learn as much as he could, observing more than acting, and Korr had slowed her movements so he could understand what she was doing, they were both throwing everything they had in the fight today.

Where Finn was strong and stable with his long heavy sword enabling him to move less and reach farther. Korr was light and fast, forcing him to twist around more than he’d like to avoid being stabbed in the back. Despite her smaller stature, her hits were powerful, and their blades clashed deafeningly when they met, neither of them flinching under the force of the strikes.

It was Korr’s speed that won her the match, an unexpected manoeuvre forcing Finn to react on instinct, and his body tried to move like he would have when fighting with the Knights. The movement was way too slow with the heavy broad sword, and she ducked under his arm, sweeping his feet and sending him to the floor.

They stayed unmoving for a beat, staring at each other, before Korr burst out laughing and let herself fall to the floor beside Finn, the both of them breathless, covered in sweat and sand and chortling like crazies.

Just as the applause of the crowd were breaking through the haze of the fight, a small blurry ball of excitement lunged itself on Finn, and the man barely had the time to catch Baby before the dog could lick his face. The dog took his revenge by aggressively licking his hands and arms instead, but Finn couldn’t bring himself to care, especially as Rey dropped beside him, dragging him into a brief but tight hug.

“That was amazing!”

Finn couldn’t help but beam back, all thoughts of modesty swept away by the pride and adrenaline.

“That was pretty cool.”

Rey beamed back.

“Seriously, you are really good at this.” She looked up, and leaned over Finn to offer her hand to Korr who was watching them curiously.

“Hi, I’m Rey.”

“Oh, you’re the prodigious smith everyone’s been talking about. Pleased to meet you, I’m Korr.”

Rey blushed a bit under the praised, but quickly turned back to Finn, slapping his belly lightly.

“I’m so proud of you! Who knows, you might just be able to take me on soon.”

Finn threw his head back and laughed.

They stayed a little longer at the arena, both Korr and Finn too exhausted to do more than sit down and watch the others, but a few fighters wanted a rematch, and Rey decided that since she was done for the day at the forge, she might as well spar a bit. She took up one of the practice staff that were kept in the room but very rarely used, and went to Brance, asking him for a partner.

Brance took one look at her, smiled, and called a man, a good fighter with an attitude problem. Korr snorted, and leaned forward.

“That’ll be good.”

Rey’s opponent was already talking shit about being partnered with a newbie who wanted to bang sticks. Rey graciously offered him to keep his sword, which he did, apparently because she needed to be taught a lesson.

Unsurprisingly, Rey dropped him on his ass in a matter of seconds, without even breaking a sweat. She straightened up, already looking for another opponent. The asshole wasn’t done, however, and tried to attack her from behind.

A minute later, he had a broken nose, and a very angry Brance was dragging him away. When Rey turned back toward them, a bit worried she had taken things too far, Finn and Korr gave her thumbs up.

After that, she had a long list of opponents who were very nice to her, thanking her before and after the fight.

As it came time for dinner, Finn waved the others toward the mess hall, mentioning wanting to change his shirt, his being too covered in dirt and other fluids for even his standards.

When he left his room with a somewhat clean shirt on, the Queen was waiting in the living room, looking over the maps on Poe’s desk. Finn, taken by surprise, snapped into a military straight stance. At the noise, she looked up and walked over, soft smile on her face.

“Relax, Finn. Everything is well.”

Finn loosened his muscles, but didn’t quite dare speak yet.

“I saw your performance this afternoon.” At his surprise look, she chuckled. “I like to keep tabs on the skills of my soldiers, so Brance told me of his plans. The fight between you and Korr was a thing of beauty.”

Finn blushed a bit at the praised, and thanked his dark skin for hiding most of it.

“Thank you, your Majesty.”

“I wanted to say that I am glad that you are doing so well. You are improving at an impressive speed.”

Finn didn’t duck his head, because that wouldn’t be proper, but it was a near thing.

“I had prior training and experience, your Majesty.”

She smiled once more.

“Be that as it may be, you are nonetheless progressing faster than any of us would have thought, in other ways than simply as a fighter. You are a gifted young man, Finn, and I am glad you are with us.”

Finn didn’t know what to answer to that, and to his horrors felt his eyes prickle. He swallowed.

“Thank you, your Majesty.”

She didn’t answer, pressing one hand on his shoulder, warm and surprisingly strong for such a small woman.

She left Finn feeling warmer and lighter than he remembered ever being. When he got to the mess hall, where Korr and the other fighters had dragged them that night, he took a seat beside Rey, and she gave him an inquiring look, wondering why he took so long to get a shirt. He leaned over to lower his voice.

“The Queen came over. She wanted to congratulate me about my fight this afternoon.”

Rey nodded.

“She came to see me too this morning. She looked at the blade I was making, the one for Poe, and said that it was amazing and that she’d like for me to make one for her too.”

They both looked excitedly at each other, the feeling of being acknowledged and praised by another person, let alone one such as the Queen, foreign and exhilarating to the both of them. Suddenly, an argument broke between two of the fighters, too loud for them to keep talking, and they went back to eating.

That night, as they both prepared to go to bed, Rey popped her head into Finn’s room, and looked at him with a fond smile.

“I’m proud of you, Finn. And I know Poe will be proud too.”

She was gone, and Finn heard her door closing behind her and Baby. As he closed his own door, he couldn’t help but think it over.

Would Poe be proud of him? Yes, Finn was sure he would. Poe had been proud of much smaller things that Finn had done.

Finn let himself fall into bed on his back, thinking about it. Poe would probably know about everything that happened before he ever got a chance to find Rey and Finn, either through the Queen or through the palace’s grapevine, which Finn was discovering to be scarily efficient.

So he would come to find Finn, and he would beam that huge, gorgeous smile of his, the one that made Finn warm all over, and then he’d probably drag Finn in a hug, wrapping him tight. Poe’s hugs were amazing, and he gave them freely, but maybe that one would be a little better, a little more special.

Maybe Poe would still be a little damp from having just cleaned, smelling just like Poe, hair sticking in all directions.

Maybe he’d whisper against Finn’s neck as they hugged, telling how proud of him Poe was, how much he missed him while he was away.

Just as he was starting to loose himself in the fantasy, he realised his cock more than half hard, and his eyes flew open for a second. He hadn’t intended to get aroused, he was just- he was just thinking about Poe-

For a second, he considered letting the erection disappear on its own, not doing anything about it, but his thoughts flitted briefly back to Poe and his gorgeous hair and his eyes and his-

He felt a tug in his groin and moaned, realising the erection was not going away anytime soon this time, without a panic attack to dampen it.

And after all, if Rey was right, and Rey was always right, if there was nothing wrong with being attracted to other men, nothing wrong with _wanting_ then maybe, maybe he was allowed this.

No one would mind, since no one would know, least of all Poe.

Finn relaxed back into the mattress, letting his eyes flutter close. His thoughts immediately went back to Poe.

He tentatively wrapped a hand around his cock, and almost cried out at the jolt that coursed through him. He slapped his other hand over his mouth, and whined against it. Gods, it felt amazing. He started moving his hand up and down the length, and groaned, head arching back, pushing against the pillow.

He felt as if his body was on fire and almost on his own, his hand started moving faster. Under the bright burst of sensation, his hand tightened around his cock, and he almost yelled again, the sound muffled by his left hand pressing hard enough against his mouth to leave marks.

Suddenly, his mind switched his hand for Poe’s, and Finn could almost imagine the other man on top of him. His eyes would be dark and intense, devouring Finn, noting every single twitch, smirking in that fond way of his.

The thought of Poe’s long fingers wrapping around his cock, gripping him tight and sure, had Finn arching off the bed, and he whined, head trashing from side to side. Through his closed eyes, he was seeing Poe, gorgeous Poe, and he imagined him talking, because Poe was always talking.

The warm, soft voice would be deafening in the room, with no other noise than Finn’s moans.

“You’re so good, Finn, so good. I’d do this all day, all day with you Finn. I’m so proud of you, you’re doing so well.”

Suddenly all his muscles seized up, his hand holding his cock even tighter and he was coming, a thick, white liquid spurting out of his cock and all over his hand and belly.

He fell back on the bed, all his muscles limp and sated, like he had trained all day, but even better. He slowly let go of his cock, and brought down the hand he had kept over his mouth.

If this was what sex felt like all the time, Finn could understand why the Knights prohibited it for the Troopers. Finn could easily imagine a lot of his comrades being very distracted by it, and distractions were to be avoided at all cost.

He brought up the hand covered in the liquid -semen, he thought he had heard someone, somewhere, call it semen- to his face, examining it. Out of curiosity, he licked a drop, and pursed his lips. The taste wasn’t too bad, but it definitely wasn’t pleasant, weirdly salty and bitter.

He stayed put for a long time, until the semen started to cool on his skin and the sensation became decidedly disagreeable. He forced himself to his feet, and grabbed the wash cloth by the basin in the corner of the room, wiping out all the traces he could find.

He fell asleep seconds after hitting the mattress.

 


	4. Chapter 4

The morning after, Finn and Rey managed to intercept Korr just as she was about to enter the Map Room, where the strategists worked. She turned to them with a kind smile.

“Finn, Rey, what can I do for you?”

Rey smiled back, but didn’t answer, standing half a step behind Finn in a silent support. She was the one thing keeping Finn for turning around and running away at the moment.

“I wondered if you still wanted to talk about the Knights of Ren with me?”

Her eyes widened, and she nodded eagerly.

“Yes, yes of course! I’m just about to meet with the other strategists and the Queen, are you free now?”

Finn nodded, setting his jaw.

“Yes. Do you mind if Rey stays with me?”

“Oh, yes, absolutely, we’d love for the both of you to join us.”

She gestured them into the room. It was large, and yet still felt cramped under all the books, maps and other documents occupying every square inch of the room. The large windows kept it from being claustrophobic, sunlight streaking brightly through the room.

The Queen was already present, talking with a small group of people. They all looked up as they entered, and Finn felt his heart rabbit, fists clenching. Rey caught his wrist and squeezed reassuringly. Korr turned back to Finn with an inquiring look, and he forced himself to nod. Reassured, she turned back to the room.

“Council, I present to you Finn and Rey. Finn was part of the Troopers of the Knights of Ren for a long time, before he escaped. He’s volunteered to help us gather information about them.”

Most of the Council members seemed very curious and open, willingly moving to take a seat. Only one man seemed horrified at the idea of a Trooper in the same room as him, and turned to the Queen with an affronted look. The quelling stare she sent his way had even Finn stand straighter. Reassured of the support of the monarch, Finn moved with Korr and Rey to take a place around the table, the two women flanking him.

Korr was the first one to ask a question, keeping her tone light but still sharp.

“Okay, Finn. First of all, do you have any idea of the size of the Knights’ army?”

He took a deep breathe, and started talking.

Finn had never thought he had known anything of interest, of importance. The Knights always made sure the Troopers knew as little as possible, in case they were captured. However, the Queen’s strategists managed to squeeze an impressive amount of information from Finn. They asked about everything, from the things he had been taught during his training, to the things he had picked up by hearing and seeing as much as he could despite not being supposed to, finishing with the things no one was really taught, but just knew; the unwritten rules and facts that exist in any society.

At the end of the day, Finn felt weary, mentally exhausted in a way he had never experienced before, slumping in his chair. Rey was pressing their shoulders together. Her tendency to avoid most casual contacts had been overruled fairly early in the day by the need to comfort both Finn and herself as she heard of the way the Knights had treated Finn.

Finn had never really thought back to his upbringing under the Knights. If asked, he would have told you it probably was different than anyone else’s, because that seemed to be the rule, but he never really stopped to consider it in depth. Contrary to other ideas the Knights had hammered into his head, such as the evilness of desire, the love between people of the same sex being a sin, or free choice being an illusion, it wasn’t something that had been confronted in his day to day life.

That day, however, he realised just how different it had been. On several occasions, he could feel Rey vibrate against him in anger. When he told them about the way the Knights kidnapped kids at a very young age, and forced them to comply to their rules and ideology through any means necessary, he had lifted his eyes to see the Queen looking a few words away from storming out and taking on the entirety of the Knights of Ren by herself.

Finn decided that describing exactly what those means entailed wasn’t necessary for anyone’s understanding, and fell silent, waiting for the next question. Everyone had looked supremely uncomfortable until the rude gentleman from before scoffed and pressed forward, seemingly uncaring about an ex-Troopers feelings, and even Rey didn’t seem to mind very much at the moment.

The sun had set for a while when the Queen finally dismissed the meeting. The Council members gathered their notes quickly and left, hoping to get to the mess before the good food was gone. Korr stayed behind, and as soon as the others had left, she dragged Finn into a hug he couldn’t help but melt into. When she released him, the Queen was standing by their sides, a comforting hand on Rey’s shoulder.

“Thank you so much for what you’ve done for us today Finn. I know it wasn’t easy for you, but everything you have given us is invaluable.”

Finn simply nodded, hoping no one would ask him to talk again for a while.

“Why don’t you and Rey go back to your quarters for the night? I’ll send someone to bring you diner.”

Finn couldn’t deny that such an idea sounded amazing, and Rey seemed to agree. He nodded with a grateful smile. The Queen moved to the door, gesturing for Korr to follow her.

“Please come, Korr, there’s still a few things I would like to discuss.”

Rey moved to Finn’s side, slipping her arm into his, tugging lightly until he followed her, leading him back to the suite.

She dropped him on the loveseat, and moved quickly to grab the comforter from her bed. She was just covering him, making sure he was comfortable when someone knocked on the door. She went to collect the food. Finn closed his eyes as he listened to her thank the servant and bring the plate in front of the fire, grabbing a foot rest to put it on.

She filled a plate and gave it to him, doing the same for herself afterward. Finn almost argued that he could feed himself, but that would have involved talking, and he planned avoiding doing so for the foreseeable future.

They ate in companionable silence, but when they were done, Rey wrapped herself in the comforter as well. She cleared her throat and started talking about her childhood, about what little she remembered of her parents, and how she survived after they left her.

Rey didn’t like to talk about her life before Finn, about as much as Finn preferred not to talk about his, and Finn felt his heart fill with gratitude and love for his best friend, and he melted into the cushions, closing his eyes and letting Rey’s voice and words soothe his mind.

They weren’t all nice tales, nor were they all sad, but they reminded Finn he wasn’t the only one with a peculiar upbringing.

He didn’t notice falling asleep, and neither did Rey.

OOOOOOOOO

Finn was the first one to wake up. He had a big crick in the neck, and unfolding himself was a very uncomfortable experience, but one look at Rey’s peaceful face made it all worth it.

He almost screamed when he felt something cold poke him on the arm, and twisted around to see Baby’s wide eyes. He felt guilty as he realised they had neglected the poor dog the night before. He gladly gathered the fur ball in his arms, and the dog curled himself against his side, sighing in happiness.

He was silent for a while, enjoying the quiet and petting the dog, until he heard Rey shift beside him.

“Did we fall asleep on the couch?”

Finn smiled dopily at her.

“Yep.”

She groaned in answer, apparently taking stock of her various sore body parts. Finn laughed and let go of Baby, who had been trying to wriggle out his grip. The dog jumped on Rey, and stuck his nose in the crook of her arm.

Rey groaned even harder and fell to the floor, dragging the dog and their cover with her. Finn burst laughing as Rey and Baby tried to untangle themselves from the comforter, the dog yapping excitedly, Rey complaining under her breath. He decided to let them figure this mess out by themselves, and went to change into his training wear. After barely moving the day before, he was bubbling with energy. He knew Korr wouldn’t be at the arena, she still had matters to take care of with the Council, since Finn had high jacked their schedule the day before, but he still wanted to improve on his sword play before Poe came back.

Rey was going back to the forge, excited to get started on the knife for the Queen. Apparently, the smith had told her that if the knife was as good as he expected it to be, Rey would be allowed to move on to large blades.

Finn, under Brance’s attentive tutelage, spent the day working against a mannequin, practicing moves over and over again, since the master had decided that while Finn’s battle reflexes where quite good, his technique left something to be desired. The man had Finn repeat sequences of movement over and over again, not accepting Finn to be off, in trajectory or target, by even an inch, and not letting him stop until he had done the movements perfectly at least ten times in a row.

It required a lot of strength and great patience, completely different from every other training Finn had ever experienced. A few other fighters had decided to join the lesson, dragging mannequins of their own to place by his side. Brance only raised a sardonic eyebrow, and told Finn that usually everyone ran in the opposite direction as soon as Brance approached the mannequins.

Finn cocked his head, confused.

“But this is a very useful exercise?”

Brance laughed and clapped his shoulder, before telling him he had been off course, and needed to start over.

For the next week, most of Finn’s time was spent in the arena, and even Brance was started to look impressed at Finn’s prowesses. Rey showed up a few times to spar against him, having deemed him a respectable opponent at last. Finn was also pretty sure he had seen her check out the broad sword Poe had given him a while ago, the one he had barely touched since he started training. He was ready to bet that as soon as the smith let her try her hand at larger blades, he would have a sword made specifically for him.

A few of Brance’s other trainees had started to come to him for advice when Brance was busy, like they did with Korr when she was in the arena.

Twice Korr and the council asked him to come back to answer questions again, but they were mostly interested in battle strategies, which Finn didn’t mind talking about. The whole thing made Finn’s time under the Knights feel useful in a way that it hadn’t before.

All this attention also had the benefit of keeping Finn from worrying too much about Poe. The cavalry had been gone over a week, and no one had received any news. Rey tried to tell him that no news was good news, but Finn could see she was preoccupied as well. However, she, Korr, Brance and the Queen all seemed to have sixth ‘Finn is about to start freaking out’ senses, and one of them would usually appear just at the right moment to whisk him away.

Finn was almost sure Rey had developed a system that involved Baby serving as some sort of messenger pigeon. Either that or everyone in the castle were psychics except him.

When they were in the mess hall, Rey and Finn had a lot of people trying to get the both of them to sit with them, and Korr had to rescue them a few times from insistent admirers:

“Of course, she was flirting with you, Finn. No one sits that close to someone without having something _else_ in mind.” Finn turned to look at Rey, but she simply shrugged. The last person who had tried to touch her without asking her first still had a black eye where she had punched him.

“Why would she be flirting with me?”

Korr stared at him for a moment.

“Because you’re hot?”

Finn had never really thought about his appearance, never really had a reason too, and silently added the concept of being physically attractive to the list of things he would have to think more about when he had time.

“But Rey and I sit close all the time? Even you do sometimes!”

Korr laughed again, but it wasn’t mean spirited.

“Yeah, but you and Rey are a bit special, and you’re really not my type.”

Finn accepted that with a thoughtful nod, but Rey was curious.

“What’s your type?”

Korr shrugged.

“Women, mostly.”

The words took a moment to register with Finn’s brain, but he turned to look at Korr, surprised.

“You like women?”

She gave him a hard blank look.

“Is it a problem?”

He opened and closed his mouth a few times, helplessly.

“I don’t know? Is it?”

Her expression softened.

“No, Finn. It’s perfectly alright.” That seemed to end the conversation, and Finn was amazed at the casualty with which Korr treated the subject: the way she talked about it openly, in the middle of the mess hall, without lowering her voice. He saw the way their neighbours had clearly heard the conversation and had not cared about it either way.

Maybe it was perfectly alright.

When Korr turned her back, Rey punched his shoulder lightly, a knowing look in her eyes.

 

OOOOOOOOOO

 

It was around noon on a day like any other that Finn heard the alarm bells for the first time. There were a lot of bells in the castle, some for time telling, others to call for certain people or functions.

The alarms bells, however, were immediately recognizable, shrill and loud, their sound bouncing from every wall everywhere in the castle.

As soon as the first bell rang, every fighter in the arena sprang into action, running toward the wall where the real weapons were stacked, dropping the blunted blades and running away properly equipped. Out of reflex, Finn did the same, grabbing the sharp broad sword Poe had given him. However, when he left the arena, he found himself at a loss. Every other fighter was part of the Resistance in some way, and already had orders regarding where to report and what to do. Finn was supposed to be Poe’s bodyguard and in the absence of the man didn’t know how to act.

“Finn!”

Rey was running toward him, obviously just out of the forge, tying a belt with a sword around her waist.

“What’s going on?”

Rey grabbed his arm, and tugged him until they found a window that was looking outward, to the fields surrounding the city.

“Apparently there’s a Knights of Ren battalion approaching us, the Queen is calling for everyone to defend the city.”

Finn frowned, leaning forward to try and see the Knights.

“That doesn’t make any sense. Kylo knows he’ll never be able to take the castle with all of the army still here.”

Rey was pressed against him, look outward too.

“Maybe they’re not attacking the castle.”

“They wouldn’t come this close without a good reason.” Finn was shaking his head, confused and frustrated.

Rey froze beside him, and Finn turned toward her, alarmed.

“What if something is dragging them out? Something they really want?”

Realisation was slowly dawning on him.

“Rey-“ His voice was pale, muted.

“What if it’s someone, someone they’ve already tried to catch?” Rey sounded terrified.

“Poe.” Finn almost choked on the name.

They shared a curt look, and ran toward the door. The troops were already leaving the castle under the watchful eye of the Queen.

“Your Majesty!”

Finn was sure she would ignore them, too busy with the preparations for battle, but she turned toward them instantly. Rey and Finn started talking over each other, before Finn decided to shut up and let her do the talking.

“Finn thinks the Knights are in pursuit of the cavalry.”

She didn’t seem overly surprised, eyes sharp and bright.

“Are you sure?”

He took a deep breath. This was something else then simply sharing his past experience, this was about using that knowledge.

“Yes, your Majesty. They wouldn’t come that close to the city without a good reason.”

“What else can you tell me?”

“They’re probably on horseback, because they managed to keep up with the cavalry. They won’t be in a tight formation, since they are in pursuit, but they’ll be able to gather pretty quickly when your army will show up.”

She nodded, and the advisers who were standing beside her took off to transmit the information. The Queen looked the both of them up and down, from Finn’s hand resting on his sword’s handle to Rey’s clenched fists, and glared at them.

“This will be a very tight fight, so I have to ask the both of you to stay inside. You don’t know about our battle formations, and you would put yourself and others in danger.”

However, just as she turned away, she winked at them. Finn was thoroughly confused, but Rey seemed to catch on, already moving toward the door. Finn followed her, more out of reflex than anything else.

“What are you doing? She told us-“

“Do you really want to stay here and do nothing?”

Finn glared at her.

“No, but we have to at least wait until she’s gone until we leave.”

Rey rolled her eyes and slipped out of the main door between two groups of soldiers. Finn sighed and followed.

“We can’t go and fight with them, at least not until both armies are in formation.”

“I know, but we can get closer, see what’s going on.”

They slipped to the edge of the city, where the troops were already in place, rows upon rows of soldiers protecting the big door. Rey and Finn strained their eyes trying to peer into the distance as more soldiers walked out.

After what felt an eternity to Finn but Rey would tell him was closer to half an hour, a figure on horseback appeared in the distance, quickly followed by numerous other riders. This far Finn couldn’t distinguish Poe from the others, but there seemed to be about as much riders galloping toward them as there had been when they left.

About five minutes behind the cavalry, the Knights of Ren appeared, cantering at full speed toward the city. When they saw the Resistance waiting for them, they slowed down, so that they could form orderly ranks.

Finn expected the cavalry to keep going, get into the city and let the Resistance take care of the Knights. After all, they had been gone for a long while, they were probably tired, and few of them had to be injured.

In hindsight, Finn should have known better. Should have known Poe better. As soon as they reached the ranks, Poe stopped his horse, and gestured for his riders to take positions while he reached the commander, discussing with him.

Finn groaned and pressed his eyes shut for a moment. Of course, Poe, stupid, brave Poe would stay and fight.

“He’s going to be fine, Finn, he’s got the whole Resistance with him.”

Finn didn’t answer, didn’t have a chance to, because the Knights charged. Finn knew they didn’t want the cavalry and the rest of the Resistance to have time to coordinate themselves.

Poe and the rest of the cavalry reacted automatically, rushing forward to intercept the Troopers.

The cavalry definitely had the upper hand in term of skills, each of them being able to take down multiple Troopers, but the Knights had a lot more riders, and a lot of them were able to move past the cavalry and rush the foot soldiers.

From there the battle field dissolved into chaos. The bright orange uniform of the Resistance fighters were easily distinguishable from the black and white get up of the Knights’ army, which was the only thing that allowed Finn and Rey to keep track of the two groups.

Slowly but surely, the Resistance gained the upper hand, though not without suffering losses of its own. Finn was starting to relax, breathing easier. The Knights however, seemed to remember what the whole point of storming the castle had been.

Suddenly, the Troopers forced the battlefield to split up into two group, leaving only one rider isolated without opponents or allies, facing the castle.

Finn felt his heart stop and saw Poe’s face fall when he realised the trap he had fallen into. He whirled his horse around, but it was too late and the remainder of the Knights’ army swarmed him.

Finn heard yells, and saw the cavalry struggle to reach their commander, Jess and Snap at the forefront, but all the Trooper’s efforts were now in keeping them away at all costs, even if it meant sacrificing their own lives.

Finn registered all this distantly, because he had already unsheathed his sword and was running into battle, Rey right behind him.

The Troopers’ manoeuvres had meant that anyone coming from the castle had a clear way to get to the fight, and Finn was upon them in a matter of seconds, but not before he saw Poe grab his swords and jump down from his horse, his high ground useless in such close quarters and against so many opponents.

Finn started swinging his sword, not thinking about technique or proper moves, only caring about getting to Poe as quickly as possible. The Troopers slowly realised that someone was attacking them from behind, and Finn’s progression got a lot slower.

He was seething, spitting, screaming. There was blood all over him and he couldn’t tell if it was his or his enemies’. He knew Rey was still fighting behind him. He knew Poe was still in danger. That were the only things that mattered.

When it happened, it was almost in slow motion. One trooper got a lucky hit and slammed Poe on the head with the handle of his sword. Poe crumbled to the ground with a yell. Finn stopped breathing.

He heard Rey scream behind him and they charged together, hacking and slashing at the Troopers still separating them from Poe as if they were dolls. Finn pushed toward Poe and intercepted the blade that was about to stab him in the heart. He cut down the Trooper and kept fighting, standing over Poe, the world around him was shrouded in a thick haze.

 

Time didn’t matter.

 

Until suddenly he was alone. He whirled around, looking for the next opponent and found none.

Rey was slamming down one last Trooper, and the Resistance were dealing with the last few soldiers a little farther away, but the fight was over.

He felt a hand on his ankle and was about to kick it away when he heard his name.

“Finn?”

He twisted and fell to his knees right beside Poe. The man’s eyes were open, and he was struggling to sit up. Finn grabbed his outstretched arm, helping him.

“Poe, thank the gods.”

The other man huffed a laugh and leaned forward until his forehead was resting on Finn’s shoulder.

“I’m fine, I’m fine.”

Finn rolled his eyes and decided that mentioning the still bleeding head wound was useless.

“Ok, can you get to your feet?”

Poe considered it for a moment.

“I might need help.”

“Right, just let me.”

They managed to get up, with the help of Rey who threw a concerned look at Poe’s wound, but kept silent.

On the way to the castle, they were joined by Jess and Snap who started to give Poe shit about being captured _again_ , leaving no time for Finn and Rey to talk to Poe, and Finn focused on Poe’s arm around his shoulder and his own around Poe’s waist, the other man needing support to keep walking.

Once they got to the healer’s wing, the two other riders disappeared before a healer could catch them. Finn set Poe down gently on a bed, and both Rey and he stepped away as an older woman strode over to take care of Poe.

Another healer appeared by Finn’s side, giving him a once over.

“You’re injured.”

Finn, confused, shook his head.

“No, I’m fine?”

She glared at him, pointing to where his arms were covered in cuts and scrapes. Finn shrugged, still not sure what she was alluding to.

“That’s not important, they’ll be mostly healed by tonight.”

She sighed, and pushed him down on a bed.

“They’ll heal even faster if they are treated.”

“I’m sure you have people more gravely injured to take care of.”

She paused for a moment, before going back to her task.

“Yes, but I’m only a trainee, I’m not qualified for them. This is the wing for the smaller injuries. I’m really good at bandages, though.”

He was about to protest more, but Rey caught his chin, forcing him to look up at her, and she glared at him. Mollified, he nodded and let the healer do her work. Satisfied, Rey moved to Poe’s bedside.

There was a curtain in front of his bed, blocking the view to either of his friends, so Finn closed his eyes while the healer treated him.

He hadn’t really thought about the cuts. They _had_ been minor, the kind of things the Knights wouldn’t have even noticed, but they did feel better now with whatever the healer had applied to them.

By the time she gave him the all clear, more people had started to come in to the room, most of them sporting minor cuts and bruises, like himself, and almost all of them being dragged in by other people while they complained that they didn’t really need to be there, they were fine, really.

The healer cursed under her breathe, making Finn snort, and she shooed him away with a wry look. Poe also looked done, head covered with a white bandage, expression grim. The healer was talking to Rey, and when Finn got closer, realised Rey was receiving instructions to care about Poe.

The other man noticed Finn first, and instead of smiling as usual, his expression turned even dourer when he spotted Finn’s bandages. Finn was about to ask him what was wrong, but Poe talked first, getting to his feet, slower than usual but still steady.

“Let’s leave the brave ladies in peace.”

He walked out of the room before anyone could answer. Finn and Rey shared a confused look as they followed behind him. Poe kept a brisk pace until he reached their quarters, his footsteps the only noise coming from him.

Even Baby, who sprung to him as soon as Poe entered the quarters couldn’t lift his mood, and he started pacing, expression twisted.

Rey and Finn looked at each other again, and she jerked her chin toward Poe, clearly saying that Finn should try and deal with this. He cleared his throat.

“Poe? What’s the matter?”

Poe whirled around, jaw set.

“Why were you on the battlefield?” He wasn’t yelling, but that was clearly more out of self-control than anything else.

Finn frowned.

“I don’t understand.”

Poe threw his hands in the air.

“Why were you on the battlefield? Who told you to go? Who _allowed_ you to go?” He was pacing again.

“No one told me to go?”

“Then why DID YOU GO?” His voice was raising.

“Because you needed help.” Finn was still not sure why Poe was so worked up, but his anger was starting to sting.

Poe jerked to a stop.

“It wasn’t your place, you didn’t have orders.”

“I was only trying to help you. I stayed out of the battle until I had to act.”

“You shouldn’t have been close enough to act! You shouldn’t have COME! I would have been fine! GodS, what were you THINKING?”

“I was thinking you were in trouble, and were going to be killed, and I needed to prevent that!”

Poe took a step forward.

“That’s not your JOB!”

“That’s exactly my job, I’m your bodyguard.”

“Not in BATTLE!”

“In battle as everywhere else! What else was I supposed to do?”

From the corner of his eyes, he saw Rey catch Baby and move away from them. Poe took another step forward, eyes thunderous, demanding his attention.

“You were supposed to stay here. Safe!”

“And let you die in battle alone?”

“YES! I KNEW WHAT I WAS GETTING INTO! _YOU’RE_ NOT A SOLDIER!”

Finn finally snapped as anger flared through his vein.

“I’VE BEEN A SOLDIER ALL MY LIFE!” He was shouting too now, and that seemed to snap Poe back to reality for a second before he pushed back.

“YOU’RE NOT A TROOPER ANYMORE!”

“So what, I’m not GOOD ENOUGH to fight for the Resistance?” Poe’s words had hurt him and he was hissing now.

“THAT’S NOT WHAT I’M FUCKING SAYING. YOU’RE NOT SUPPOSED TO BE IN BATTLE. YOU’RE NOT SUPPOSED TO FIGHT ANYMORE, YOU’RE SUPPOSED TO BE FREE!”

“I AM FREE! I MAKE MY OWN CHOICES NOW AND I CHOSE TO GO AND FIGHT FOR YOU!”

“THAT’S NOT A CHOICE, THAT’S JUST YOU DOING THE SAME THING YOU’VE ALWAYS DONE!”

“BECAUSE I CHOSE TO! I’M NOT SOME KIND OF MINDLESS BEAST! I WENT BECAUSE I THOUGHT ABOUT IT AND _I_ DECIDED I WANTED TO DO IT! JUST LIKE I WANTED TO TELL THE COUNCIL ABOUT MY TIME UNDER KYLO, OR HOW I KEPT TRAINING WHILE YOU WERE GONE OR THAT TIME I SAVED YOUR LIFE FROM THE KNIGHTS OF REN. THOSE WERE MY DECISIONS.”

“They made you talk about the KNIGHTS? ARE THEY FUCKING STUPID?”

“THAT’S WHAT YOU CARE ABOUT? _REALLY? THEY_ DIDN’T _MAKE_ ME DO ANYTHING, THAT’S THE WHOLE FUCKING POINT! I MADE MY CHOICES!”

“That could have set you back, THAT COULD HAVE HURT YOU! You’re here to get better, to heal!”

“YOU DON’T KNOW THAT! YOU DON’T KNOW WHAT I’VE BEEN THROUGH! YOU DON’T KNOW WHO I WAS BEFORE I MET YOU AND YOU DON’T GET TO JUDGE WHAT’S GOOD FOR ME! YOU DON’T GET TO DECIDE HOW I’LL HEAL!”

“Finn, I don’t think you realise that-“

Finn knew that Poe had deflated, that he was trying to appease him, but all the anger that had building up for years now was bubbling up and he couldn’t stop it.

“I DON’T REALISE WHAT? THAT I’M A FUCKING IDIOT? THAT THE KNIGHTS FUCKED WITH MY HEAD TOO MUCH, THAT I’M NOT ABLE TO MAKE MY OWN FUCKING DECISIONS NOW? THAT I SHOULD JUST DEFER TO YOU FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE BECAUSE _YOU_ KNOW WHAT’S GOOD FOR ME?”

Poe looked stricken, and he took another step forward, shaking his head violently.

“No, Finn, that’s not what I meant, I-“

“ISN’T IT? ISN’T IT EXACTLY WHAT YOU’VE BEEN SAYING? I KNOW I’M JUST SOME FUCK UP THAT GOT ROPED INTO THE KNIGHTS AND NEVER GOT TEACHERS AND TUTORS AND PEOPLE DOTING ON ME! I KNOW I’M NOT AS GOOD AS A FUCKING DUKE, BUT THIS IS MY LIFE NOW, AND I’M GOING TO DO WHAT _I_ WANT WITH IT AND YOU DON’T GET TO JUDGE ME FOR IT!”

He stopped, breathless. He could feel his eyes prickle and couldn’t be bothered to care about it. He could hear Baby whimper and Rey try to soothe him, but that registered distantly.

He could see Poe, his own eyes too bright, open and close his mouth, trying to find something to say.

“Finn-” Poe’s voice was hoarse and broken and suddenly Finn couldn’t bear to hear what he was going to say. He bolted, slamming the door behind him. He ran through the castle, having no destination in mind other than _away from Poe_ , heart hammering in his chest.

He roamed the halls for an eternity, until he found a little, out of the way alcove. He let himself slip to the floor, folding his legs so he could rest his forehead on his knees.

He wouldn’t have been able to tell how long he stayed there, and he wouldn’t have been able to tell what went through his mind.

When he came back to himself, hours later, it was pitch dark outside. He considered staying where he was for the night, but it was cold and his muscles were killing him. He got to his feet gingerly, hoping it was late enough that the others would be asleep.

He hadn’t paid attention sooner to where he had been going, so it took him a while to find his way, but he gathered as he went that it was after midnight.

However, when he opened the door, Poe was still awake, curled up in an armchair in front of the fireplace. He jumped to his feet when Finn opened the door.

“Finn!”

Finn ignored him, barely restraining himself from running to his room. After he closed the door behind himself, he leaned against it for a moment, forcing himself to breathe, angry frustrated tears welling back up. He heard Poe walk up to his door, stopping there. For a long moment, nothing happened, neither of them moving, before Poe sighed and walked away, to his own room.

He heard a faint whimper, and opened his eyes to see Baby standing on his bed. He walked up to the dog, and for a brief second considered bringing it out of his room, the need for solitude almost overwhelming, but he sighed, sliding under the covers and dragging the dog to his chest.

The dog sighed happily, and curled against him.

The dog didn’t protest as Finn kept petting him for hours, unable to sleep, unable to stay completely still.

 

OOOOOOOOOO

 

When he opened his eyes the next day, the sun was already high in the sky. Finn couldn’t remember ever waking up this late, and yet he wanted nothing more than roll over and go back to sleep.

Baby, however, disapproved, and poked his cold nose in increasingly disagreeable places until Finn groaned and relented, getting to his feet and opening the door. The dog ran out, presumably to relieve himself.

Finn followed at a much more sedate pace. When he stepped in the living room, only Rey was waiting for him, and she wrapped him in a tight hug.

She sighed as she let him go.

“Poe is with the Queen, she needed to debrief him about the cavalry’s mission. Jess said it would probably last all day.”

Finn nodded absently. His mind still felt a bit numb. He couldn’t just go about his normal business, the healer had told him he couldn’t fight for a few days, but he also couldn’t just stay in their quarters all day, scared of Poe coming back.

Rey forced herself to smile.

“How about we go take a walk, uh? Leave the palace for a while?”

Finn didn’t care either way, but it was something to do, and at least he’d be with Rey. She beamed at him, skipping to the door. Apparently, she had decided to balance his lack of enthusiasm by doubling her own.

They went to grab some food they could eat as they walked, and left the castle. Finn could tell Rey wanted to talk about Poe, but she never actually broached the subject. They walked to the Middle Market, already bustling with people. It felt a bit weird being on the other side of the stalls, looking at produces and wares they would actually be able to afford.

Finn started feeling like himself again as he watched Rey flit around, talking to everyone, asking questions about everything and generally being her adorable self.

By the time the sun started setting and people were packing up their leftovers, Finn was laughing at Rey’s antics and nibbling on a sugar bun he had bought earlier, appetite coming back to him.

Rey slipped back at his side, jerking her chin in the direction of the castle.

“Ready to go back?”

Finn took a deep breath and nodded, squaring his shoulders. She smiled encouragingly at him, and they set back toward the fortress.

When Rey opened the door to their quarters, Poe was once again pacing up and down the room, but this time his face was distraught, not angry. Once he realised he was being watched, he spun around, mouth opening without a sound.

There was a long awkward pause, until Rey elected to remove herself.

“I think Jess wants to see me.”

She started to move away, only to come back when she realised neither Finn nor Poe had moved a muscle, and she pushed Finn in the room, closing the door behind him.

Poe shook his head and cleared his throat.

“I heard you left the castle…”

Finn pursed his lips.

“Why, am I not allowed to?”

Poe flinched away, face twisting even more.

“No! No that’s not what I meant, I just. I thought you left. Left- you know. For good.”

Finn caught on, and shook his head.

“No, no I didn’t. Except if you want me to-”

“No!” Poe looked panicked for a second, taking a few steps toward him before stopping himself, rocking a bit on his feet. “No, no I want you to stay.”

They stared at each other for a long moment, before Poe swallowed.

“I’m so sorry, Finn.”

He looked miserable, eyes wide and shining. Finn didn’t know what he was supposed to say, so he kept silent. Poe swallowed again, raking his hair with his fingers.

“Gods, I was such an idiot, I’m so sorry. I don’t even know why I said those things. Finn, I-”

His voice trailed out.

“Did you mean it?” Finn’s voice was barely a whisper, but Poe seem to hear him just fine.

“Finn?”

“Did you mean what you said?”

Poe shook his head, struggling for words.

“No! No, Finn, I- I was tired, I was hurt, I didn’t mean it.”

Finn sighed and went to the arm chair, dropping himself on it with a groan. Poe followed him gingerly, perching himself at the edge of the cushion of the loveseat.

“But you still thought it. You still said it.”

Poe exhaled and bent forward to take his head in his hands.

“I didn’t, I- I worry about you. Not because you can’t handle yourself, I know you can. But- there’s still so much for you to learn, and it’s not your fault, but it’s still true.”

Finn only looked at him, letting him finish his thoughts.

“You’re so bright, and kind and smart, and you’ve been through so much, and I just want to keep you safe. I want you to have the life you deserve. I want you to be as happy and safe as you can be.”

Finn cocked his head.

“You can’t just keep me here wrapped in a blanket forever.”

Poe huffed at laugh and let go of his head to look at Finn.

“I know, Finn. I know, I was a jerk, I’m sorry. I never meant to insult you.”

Finn took a deep breathe.

“You’ll have to let me make my own choices. I’ll probably make mistakes, I know I’m not the smartest guy around,” Poe looked like he was about to protest, but Finn kept going, “so I’ll definitely fuck up once in a while, but I’ve heard that kind of the point.”

Poe answering smile was still a bit wavering, but he nodded.

“I can’t promise I won’t be upset when it happens.”

Finn huffed a laugh.

“And I’m sure I’ll be pissed at you when you do something stupid. But you still can’t make me decisions for me.”

Poe nodded again.

“I won’t. I promise.”

Finn smiled at him.

“Thank you.”

There was a brief silence, and suddenly Poe jumped to his feet, before crouching in front of Finn. Surprised, the other man straightened up in his seat. Poe leaned forward, bracing his hands on Finn’s knees.

“I have never, ever thought I was better than you, for any reason. Ever. You are the best man I have ever met. You are brave, and smart, and kind and you astound me every day. The fact that you were raised under the Knights of Ren and still grew up to be you only makes you even more extraordinary. I will never judge you. I could never judge you.”

Finn could only stare at him, eyes welling up. Poe didn’t look away either, eyes wide and softer than Finn knew was possible.

“Finn?”

Finn could only nod, not trusting his voice at the moment. Poe’s answering was small but genuine, and he rocked backward to push himself to his feet.

Finn immediately missed his warmth, and he jumped up too, and grabbing Poe to drag him into a tight hug. The other man answered right away, melting in the embrace, arms as strong as Finn’s around his waist.

They stayed like that for a long time, until even Finn noticed, but neither of them really cared much, still holding on.

Poe exhaled against Finn’s neck, making him shiver, and Finn prayed that he hadn’t noticed.

“I’m so sorry, Finn.”

Finn squeezed one last time before letting Poe go.

“It’s fine, Poe. It’s okay.”

Poe didn’t look like he believed him, but he let him go, smiling hopefully at him.

“Come on, let’s find Rey, you two have to get me up to speed on everything I missed.”

They didn’t need to look far. Rey was waiting just outside of the door, talking to Jessica. The two women looked up as they opened the door, Jessica smirking at she spotted Poe’s hand resting on Finn’s shoulder. She walked up to them, punching Poe’s shoulder.

“Good to know you’re not a complete fucking idiot all the time, boss.”

Poe only rolled his eyes at her, but he tightened his hand on Finn’s shoulder, like he was scared he would move away.

That was about the last thing Finn ever wanted to do, and he smiled happily at the other rider.

“Hey Jess. How are you doing?”

She flipped her hair.

“I’m doing great, since I was good enough that _I_ didn’t got hit on the head.”

Poe groaned, and tugged Finn toward the mess hall.

“Come on, I’m starving.”

Jess snorted.

“Here I thought you were thirsty.”

Poe choked and blushed. Finn and Rey shared a confused look, but Jess seemed very entertained.

“You are a menace.” Poe was glaring daggers at Jess.

The mess hall was especially noisy that night, with the riders finally back and most of them healthy and well.

Despite what he said, Poe and Jessica commandeered most of the talking, launching themselves into a dramatic retelling of their mission, with Snap intervening once in a while when they got too carried away.

Finn was relieved to learn that before the last day or so, when the Knights that would attack the castle showed up, the whole trip had been mostly uneventful.

Rey and Finn didn’t get a chance to talk about their own week until they were back to the suite, curled up in front of the fireplace.

Rey jumped on the chance to present his new knife to Poe. The man was thrilled, thanking her profusely, and immediately jumped to switch his old knife from his equipment.

When it was time to Finn’s turn, Poe seemed suitably impressed.

“You mean you almost won Brance’s tournament?”

Finn snorted.

“No, I finished second best at the tournament. I never had a shot against Korr.”

That didn’t seem to matter much to Poe, who was smiling proudly.

“Man, I wish I could have seen that.”

“It was pretty awesome, you missed out.”

“Thank you Rey.”

He grew serious when Finn mentioned the meeting with the Council, but he didn’t comment, simply nodding encouragingly. Finn could tell he was dying to know what Finn had talked about, but didn’t dare ask about it yet. He had been tentative with Finn all evening.

It was understandable, but it still rattled Finn. Poe was never tentative, he was confident and charming and-

Finn stopped that train of thought. It wasn’t the time to start staring lovingly at Poe again. There was never a time for him to look lovingly at Poe if he wanted to keep his crush a secret, but now would be especially bad. No matter how handsome he looked in the firelight, or how beautiful his laugh was or-

Finn physically shook himself, and both his friends turned to him, interrupting their conversation.

“Everything all right, buddy?”

Finn smiled in what he hoped was a reassuring manner.

“Of course, I’m fine!”

Poe looked skeptical, and got to his feet.

“Maybe we should go to bed. It’s been a long day.”

Rey echoed the sentiment. Baby, who’d be dozing off, jumped up when people started moving. The poor dog looked conflicted about whether he should follow Poe or Rey. Rey laughed at him, and waved him off.

“Sorry Baby, you’re sleeping with your father tonight.”

 


	5. Chapter 5

During the following days, a new status quo was established. The day would start with one or two hours of sword training for Finn, and Poe would either join him in the arena or run drills with the cavalry. After that, now that he had returned, Poe would have to attend to his other duties.

The duties no one had thought to talk to Finn about until now. Because apparently they were supposed to be common knowledge, never mind that Finn was new to the kingdom or that politics were never his teacup to start with. How was someone raised as a grunt for the First Order supposed to have an in depth grasp of the kingdom’s line of power?

Oh yeah, because the thing everyone kind of forgot to tell Finn about? Was that Poe was the Queen’s successor.

Finn was pretty sure he should have been made aware of that sooner, as Poe’s bodyguard.

“How can you be her successor? I thought you two weren’t related?” Finn was walking beside Poe. He had tried to stay half a step behind him like he had seen the other bodyguards do, but Poe had simply glared at him and tugged at his arm until Finn relented and stood to his side.

“Her son has been killed by Kylo Ren years ago, her husband ran away and her brother disappeared. She doesn’t have any relative that has ever lived in this city for longer than a few weeks. She asked the Council if she could elect an heir, they accepted if I was the one nominated.” Poe’s voice was bland, like he wasn’t really happy about it, but had come to peace with it.

Finn could only imagine Poe’s internal struggle between doing what’s best for his people and kingdom, and remaining free from the heavy responsibilities of the throne.

“Why is this the first time I’ve heard about this?” asked Finn.

“Because it doesn’t matter.” Poe still sounded off, but Finn didn’t feel he could drop this conversation.

“What do you mean, it doesn’t matter? Of course it matters! It makes you the second most important person in the kingdom! Why didn’t you have a bodyguard before me if you’re the heir?”

“Because I don’t need one.” Poe pursed his lips.

“The events of the last few days would disagree with you.”

“Fine, I didn’t need a bodyguard.”

“Yes, you did. I can’t believe you don’t have a _food tester,_ let alone a bodyguard!”

Poe’s duties ranged anywhere from attending Councils with the Queen and her strategists to sitting in the open courts the Queen held once a week, where the public could come in and present issues to the her.

Poe had tried to convince Finn he didn’t need to stay with him at all times.

“You don’t need to put yourself through this, buddy. I know those things can be dreadfully boring. Just because I have to be there doesn’t mean you do.”

Finn spun toward him, glaring, poking him on the sternum.

“I’m your bodyguard, Poe. We agreed on this, all of us. You included. What’s the point of having a bodyguard if I’m never around to guard you?”

“Finn-”

“I’m _not_ done. I am not bored. I am learning about the kingdom, about the life outside of the Knights, about you. I like hearing the people, I like learning how your advisers think. And I really like learning about _your_ life.” Finn took a deep breathe, shrugging. “If you’re going to be King someday, I want to know as much as I can to help you.”

Poe stared at him, disbelieving, for a long time before dragging him into a hug.

“Thanks buddy.”

After that, Poe stopped trying to keep Finn away from his functions, and instead worked to include him more.

When the Council discussed the Knights of Ren, Poe would ask Finn for input and insight. When they were listening to the people’s woes and concerns, with Finn standing right behind Poe’s seat, the older man would whisper additional information about whatever was discussed.

Finn was flabbergasted at Poe’s vast knowledge of his people. He remembered everyone he met, and everything they would tell him. He had a gift for making people feel special, and Finn couldn’t even begin to understand how he did it. It was a mix of natural charm, warm personality, sharp intelligence and a profound desire to be liked.

Some afternoons, rather than official functions, they would leave the castle to meet other persons in taverns. Informants, Poe called them. At first Finn thought they were spies, but it was quickly apparent that that wasn’t exactly the case. They weren’t talking about illicit activities, not necessarily, and they never reported about enemies of the Royal family. They would talk about what was going on in the town. What merchant was on the rise, which one was falling. Who moved into the city recently, who might be starting trouble. Once in a while, one of the informants would come from outside of D’Qar and bring news of others towns and settlements farther away.

Finn now understood how incredulous Poe had been that Rey and he had managed to slip under his radar for months.

“One of the most important things about running a kingdom is knowing what’s going on. You need to be in touch with the people.” Poe said with a calm assurance.

They were strolling through the streets after a meeting. Poe was smiling, looking up to the sky, seemingly without a care in the world. Finn glanced guiltily at the graceful lines of his neck before looking away.

“You’ll be a good ruler, Poe.” Said Finn, admiringly.

Poe shook his head ruefully.

“I’ll never be as good as Leia.”

“Yeah, those are pretty big shoes to fill.” Finn huffed. “But you’ll have me and Rey. I’m sure that the three of us will be able to figure it out.”

Poe beamed and wrapped an arm around Finn’s shoulders.

“With you by my side, buddy, I can do anything.”

Poe had become even more tactile then before the Fight, hugging Finn at least twice a day, wrapping an arm around his shoulders when he could, clapping his arm, or his back, or his chest, or pretty much everything that was in reach.

Finn really, really wouldn’t mind, because really, he wanted to touch Poe all day, every day, except that was kind of the problem. Poe’s constant presence was making it very hard for Finn to pretend like he wasn’t very much falling in love with him.

Oh yes, because it _was_ getting worse. Poe was still Poe, but he almost seemed to be even _more Poe_ nowadays. Finn couldn’t explain it, but it was driving him crazy.

“Maybe you should tell him.” Offered Rey

A month had passed since the attack on D’Qar, and Rey and Finn were watching Poe finishing the cavalry training, one of the rare ones that stretched over the whole day. The young woman was trying to scrub most of the grim away from her face. Finn didn’t even try to pretend he didn’t know what she was talking about.

“Rey…”

“This is getting ridiculous, Finn. Even I can tell you’re completely gone for him. _Me._ ”

“I can’t do that, Rey.”

“At some point, he’ll figure it out for himself. Your face is not exactly subtle.”

“It doesn’t matter. Me telling him would only make things awkward.”

“You take for granted he doesn’t feel the same way.”

“Of course he doesn’t feel the same way. It’s Poe, he can do much better than me.”

“First, that’s wrong. You’re great, _Poe_ ’s the first one to say so. Second, have you seen how he is around you?”

“He doesn’t act any differently with you.”

“Oh really? Strange, I don’t remember him freaking out over _me_ running out on the battlefield and getting injured. Or looking at me like the most beautiful thing he’s ever seen. Or talking about me all the time when I’m not there. Or-“

Thankfully, Poe showed up at that moment, and Rey was too nice to try and push him into confessing.

“Hey guys!”

The smile he gave Finn was blinding, and the younger man couldn’t breathe for a second, until Jess showed up and broke the moment.

As they walked over, Rey leaned over to whisper in his ear.

“Ridiculous.”

He pushed her away.

That night, Poe decided they would eat in the private dinner room, despite almost never using it. Finn couldn’t be sure, but it seemed to have something to do with Jessika, who had spent the last few days embarrassing Poe with weird statements.

Poe sat himself beside Finn at dinner, facing Rey.

“I swear to god, if that Teedo asshole tries one more time to steel my metal from me, I’m going to flip out.”

Rey was complaining about one of her coworkers, irritably tearing up a piece of bread.

“I can come and give you a hand if you want.” Finn was grinning at her. Poe laughed and pressed their shoulders together, despite the rest of the table being free. Finn blushed and looked down.

Rey only snorted, too wound up to notice Finn’s predicament.

“Thanks, but I can take care of _Teedo_ by myself. I’d just rather not have to start a fight in the forge.”

Poe shrugged.

“I can have a talk with him, if you want.” Poe’s voice was light but his eyes shone with how much he disliked the idea of someone causing Rey any trouble.

Rey sent him a thankful smile, but she shook her head.

“No, it’s not worth it. He’ll get tired of it eventually. It’s not like there’s anyone who doesn’t know he’s a terrible smith.”

“Well, if you ever need me to come over and show off my muscles while you take him down, I’m available.” Finn offered casually, flexing his arms in demonstration.

She snorted.

“I’ll keep that in mind, Finn. But _somehow_ I don’t think you want to show off your muscles to _Teedo._ ”

Finn glared at her, and Poe blushed, moving away from Finn slightly. The movement confused Finn, and Poe avoiding his eyes did nothing to help him.

“What-”

The door opened before he could investigate further, the Queen striding briskly in the room.

“Poe, I need to talk to you about the guests for the ball.”

Rey and Finn smiled and bid welcome to the Queen. Poe simply groaned, dropping his forehead to Finn’s shoulder.

“Can’t we just invite no one and have a Ball with only D’Qar people?”

“The invitations are already sent, Poe Dameron, _which you know_ , we just need to check the seating arrangements. God knows we don’t need another Grievous-Kenobi situation.”

Poe grimaced and moved to the head of the table, where the Queen had unrolled a sheet of parchment. Finn and Rey shared an amused look. Poe and the Queen had been working over this ball for the past week.

“It’s an annual tradition. Every year, on the same day, all the neighbouring nobles are invited to a ball, in the name of strengthening our alliances and possibly find a suitable spouse for unmarried heirs. It’s pretty boring until people start fighting. At least, this year you two will suffer with me.” Poe had draped himself dramatically over the armrest of the couch, groaning.

Finn snorted, punching his shoulder.

“Hey, we’re not aristocrats, we don’t have to go.”

“Finn! How could you abandon me to my suffering?” Poe gasped, pressing one hand against the spot Finn had hit, voice overly affected. “I thought we were fri-I thought you have my back!” He pushed his lower lip forward into a ridiculous pout that Finn desperately wanted to kiss.

Finn snorted and settled for patting his hair. His ridiculously soft, bouncy hair.

“I guess, as your bodyguard, I should come and make sure no one whisks you away to force you into matrimony.”

At Finn’s word, Poe groaned even louder, covering his eyes with his arm.

“Well, I’m going. I want to see what the other nobles look like. They can’t all be as bad as Poe.” Quipped Rey. Poe had smiled at Rey as she started talking before throwing a grape at her when she finished.

“I see how it is. I thought you were better than that guys, but apparently I was wrong.”

When Finn had admitted to Poe that he had no idea what a ball even was, Poe had simply shot him an envious look.

“You have no idea how lucky you are, buddy.”

The Ball was now due the day after tomorrow, and Poe was growing grumpier by the hour. The Queen seemed endlessly entertained by it. After she and Poe had finished looking over the seating arrangements, she walked over to the both of them with a warm smile.

“Are you two also ready for the ball?”

“Well, I still don’t know how to dance.” Finn answered. Poe had been putting off teaching them, apparently hoping that if he pretended the ball wasn’t approaching, it wouldn’t happen.

The Queen turned to glare at her protégé.

“Don’t worry, I told you that I’ll teach you.” Poe was smiling at him, ignoring the Queen.

Finn didn’t know anything about dancing, but he was pretty sure it involved two people standing face to face and touching each other a fair amount while moving in pre-established patterns, which sounded both amazing and horrifying.

“We also have nothing to wear.” Rey, ever the practical one, interrupted Finn and Poe’s staring session.

The Queen threw her hands in the air.

“Poe Dameron, by the gods!”

 

OOOOOOOOOO

 

The following day, at the crack of them, Poe raised them with a sadistic grin, and dragged them to the castle’s seamstress. The short woman raised her head as they entered, and glared at Poe, waving a pair of scissors.

“No. No, I don’t care what you’ve done to your suit now, I am not fixing it again. You will walk in that room butt naked, I swear I don’t care.”

Poe barked a laugh and shook his head, gesturing to Finn and Rey.

“Relax, Edna, I’ve been treating my suit with all the respect and care it deserves. No, I’m here for these two.”

She glared at him one last time before walking to Finn and Rey with a considering look in her eye.

“Ah yes, the two new sensations. They really are as handsome as people have been saying.”

Finn chocked on air and felt himself blush while Rey smiled sweetly at the seamstress. Finn really needed to get on Rey’s level.

Poe chuckled again and clasped their shoulders, standing between them.

“Yes, yes they are. Will you be able to take care of them?”

Finn didn’t need to look at him to know he had that charming smile he used when he wanted to get his way. Contrary to Finn, however, Edna seemed unaffected, throwing him an unimpressed look.

“Of course, I will. But only because the Queen knows you too well and came to commission their garments days ago. She told me you wouldn’t think about it until it was too late.”

Poe cleared his throat, blushing.

“Ah, Edna, I’m sure that with your great talent, you would have made something great regardless.” Poe smiled winningly and Finn had to admire his persistence.

She scoffed, grabbing a measuring tape.

“Great? Of course it would have been great! It would have been done by me! But would it have highlighted her gorgeous eyes or his broad shoulders the way they deserve to be?” She whirled back toward him, waving an accusatory finger. “No, they wouldn’t have! Shame on you, Poe Dameron!”

After that, Poe deemed wise to make himself scarce, and he disappeared, claiming that someone needed his help. Finn and Rey were left at the mercy of Edna, and the whole morning was spent putting on and taking off their garments, until she pushed them out of workshop with their arms full of luxurious fabric.

“They’re as perfect as they will get today. Now shoo, I have other people to take care of.”

After dropping their new clothes in their room –very carefully, very respectfully- they set out to find Poe. It turned out he really was busy with the Queen and didn’t needed Finn’s watchful eye. They volunteered themselves to help the staff to get the Great Ball room ready instead.

That night, Poe made good on his promise to teach them to dance. Well, as Rey was really keen to remind Finn, he had only promised Finn to teach him. Rey simply invited herself.

Rey jumped to her feet first, planting herself in front of Poe with that determined air she would get in the forge sometimes. Poe chuckled, shaking his head.

The first half an hour was painful, both to watch and to experience. Rey was tense and rigid, and the whole concept of being led was strange and vaguely disgusting to her. However, slowly, she started to relax and focus more on having fun then executing every move perfectly.

Poe told joke after joke to try and make her comfortable, telling them of when Jess and himself had been forced to dance together for a lesson, and how they would try to trip each other all the time, or that time Snap couldn’t dart away fast enough and was forced to waltz while still in his riding gear, no one trusting him to come back if given the opportunity to change.

When Rey decided she knew enough not to make a fool of herself, Finn stepped up with a smile. Rey graciously walked away, dropping on a chair against the wall of the empty room they had commandeered for the dancing lesson.

Finn took her place, and Poe calmly started positioning him the way he should be, one hand on Poe’s shoulder, the other one holding Poe’s hand. Poe had his other hand on his waist, and Finn could have sworn Poe and Rey hadn’t been standing that close.

Finn was immensely grateful to his dark skin for hiding his blush. Poe’s new tendency to touch him more had also accustomed Finn enough to his contact that he didn’t immediately start losing control of his body, which was another plus.

Poe looked him over once and nodded.

“You’ve seen the steps I’ve done with Rey?” His voice was deeper, rougher than usual, but Finn chalked it up to the effort he just gave for dancing with Rey, and merely nodded. Poe smiled reassuringly at him.

“Alright, let’s do this.”

They didn’t start as disastrously as Rey had, merely because Finn wasn’t quite as tense and didn’t have any problem whatsoever to being led by Poe.

None.

Where Rey had a natural grace, Finn had a lifetime of remembering precise movement combinations and of moving in synch with other people. He certainly wasn’t light of foot, but he followed Poe easily enough.

This close, Finn could smell Poe on every breath, and it was intoxicating. He could feel the warmth of his arm around his waist, and he was mesmerized by the golden flakes in his brown eyes as Poe looked over his shoulder. He couldn’t think of anything but Poe, confident that the other man would lead them away from trouble.

Poe turned his head toward Finn, catching his eyes. Finn knew he should look away, knew all his thoughts and emotions were too clear, knew Poe would _have_ to know now, but he couldn’t. Not when Poe’s face was a few breathes away from his, not when Poe’s excited smile slipped, mouth falling slightly open. Not when Poe’s expression was filled with wonder, happiness and something else- something Finn couldn’t identify but made him feel impossibly warm inside.

Finn barely noticed that they had stopped dancing, because the pressure around his waist was increasing, Poe bringing him closer ever so slowly. Finn swallowed, licking his lips, and Poe’s eyes tracked the movement, dark and intoxicating.

“POE!”

The door of the room slammed open and Jessika came striding in. Poe and Finn jerked apart, twisting to look at her with wide eyes. Jess froze in her track, and something akin to despair appeared in her eyes.

“Aaaaaaaaaaargh.” Rey was curled forward in her chair, glaring daggers at Jess. Finn couldn’t remember ever seeing Rey so angry. Jess’s shoulder slumped as the two of them shared a long look.

“Noooooo.” Jess whined.

Finn had no idea what was going on, and he couldn’t bring himself to look at Poe to ask for clarification. The other man was rigid beside him, and Finn wasn’t sure he was actually breathing. The only thing keeping him from dying of mortification was the fact that Poe still hadn’t let go of his waist.

The older man cleared his throat, voice a little hoarse and very irritated.

“Jessika.”

She winced, and turned toward him.

“Hey boss. Qui Gon Jinn just arrived and he wanted to talk to you.”

Poe sighed, and nodded jerkily.

“I’ll be there in a moment.”

She gave him one last apologetic smile before turning on her heels and leaving the room. Finn felt Poe deflate, turning toward him. Finn swallowed and forced himself to look at Poe. His eyes were soft and reluctant.

“You should get to bed, tomorrow is going to be a long day.”

Finn nodded wordlessly and Poe pulled away with a sigh. He walked out the room, ruffling Rey’s hair as he passed.

Finn laid awake on his bed that night long enough to hear Poe come back, well after midnight. The man paused for a moment outside his door, before walking past to his own.

The morning of the ball, Poe was whisked away before Finn and Rey could make it out of their own rooms. When Finn tried to follow him, he was informed by Korr that it was considered rude to bring a bodyguard when meeting other lords. They tried to find a way to make themselves useful again, but Snap stopped them and informed them, insistently, that they should take the day easy, relax in their quarters.

“It’s what most of the guests will do. Poe is only busy because he have to entertain the most important nobles. The staff will take care of everything, don’t worry.”

Finn and Rey spent the day reading some of Poe’s book, taking turns to tell each other fairy tales, laughing at how ludicrous they were, or gasping in horror when they turned unexpectedly gory. About an hour before the ball, they were interrupted by a sharp knock at their door.

Before they even got to their feet, Edna burst into the room with one of her assistant.

“Come children, let’s get you dressed.”

Rey frowned, rubbing her arm.

“We know out to get dressed.” She said, almost petulant.

Edna smirked at her, waving her hand dismissively.

“How course you do, everyone knows how to put on clothes. I’m here to get you _dressed._ When I’m done with you, darling, you’ll be the star of the ball.”

Finn decided it’d just be simpler to do as she said. Both he and Rey fetched their clothes, and Edna had them change first. Then the assistant got started on Rey’s hair, while Edna whirled around Finn.

“All those snobs, they all think they’ve got the best tailors and seamstresses. Bah. I’ll show them, you two will be resplendissants! It’s been forever since there’s been fresh blood in this bunch, it’ll do them good.”

Edna was putting the finishing touches to Rey’s hair when the hour of the ball rang. She had them stand before her, inspecting them closely. Rey had a gorgeous purple dress that managed to be comfortable to wear and highlight her body and her eyes.

Finn was wearing a dark blue suit that complimented his skin beautifully, wrapping tightly around his chest and shoulders without feeling restrictive.

“Now just remember, you’re better than any of them. Never be ashamed of who you are and where you come from, no matter how much they want you to be. Especially if they want you to be.” Edna said, peering up in their eyes.

Finn couldn’t help but wonder if there was anyone in the castle that didn’t know about his past. There was a brief silence before she nodded, and as if summoned, Poe showed up to collect them.

Entering the ball was a surreal experience. This time, Poe had no choice but let Finn stand behind him as a proper bodyguard. The huge ball room was filled with people, most of which neither Finn nor Rey had ever met. All the women seemed to be dressed in huge, brightly colored dresses, with the skirts so large Finn didn’t understand how they could move in them, let alone sit down or dance. He could practically _hear_ Rey mentally thanking Edna for not putting her in one of those. The men wore suits similar to Finn’s, but they looked stiff and uncomfortable. Finn couldn’t have told if that was because of the clothes or if that was how they held themselves all the time.

Poe was immediately swarmed by a group of young women all vying for his attention, and Finn had to fight to remain close to him.

Jessika had appeared by their sides, holding a wine glass and a wry smirk. Rey greeted her with a wide relieved smile.

“Every year, it’s the same thing, everyone wants a piece of the great Poe Dameron.” Jess rolled her eyes and handed the glass to Rey.

She then smiled, and grabbed Rey’s arm.

“Come on, noob. Let’s find some actual fun to be had around here.”

Jess took it upon her to introduce Rey to the lower gentry, those that had enough prestige to be invited, but not enough to be stuck up.

Finn had to stay by Poe’s side, and for the first time since he took up his role as bodyguard, found himself bored. Poe would talk to aristocrats after aristocrats while he stood behind, ignored by most of them. A few actually seemed interesting and didn’t act like their only goal was to get into Poe’s pants, but they were usually quickly tackled to the side by the more insistent pursuers.

Finn was a bit taken aback by the number of men that flirted with Poe, though the women were still a majority.

Once in a while he’d get a glimpse of Jess and Rey, and they looked like they were enjoying themselves. Poe, on the other hand, was growing stiffer every time someone leaned a bit too close or grabbed his arm or shoulder for no reason.

It bothered Finn immensely that Poe, the most tactile person he knew, would be placed in a situation where physical contact made him uneasy and uncomfortable.

Finn discovered he could be fairly intimidating when he wanted to be, and he took to standing by Poe’s shoulder, glaring away overly insistent admirers. Poe thanked him under his breath after some Count reached to clap his shoulder only to take one look at Finn and draw back.

A few hours into the ball, there was a lull in the flux of people talking to Poe, allowing them to take a breather. It also happened that they were standing right beside the door. When Poe looked around and saw a large group of women walking toward them with determined expressions, he grabbed Finn’s hand.

“Poe?” Finn asked, unsure of how to react.

“Come on!” His tone was urgent and he took off toward the door, dragging Finn with him.

“What’s going on?” Finn asked again, still confused. Poe sneaked out of the door before taking off running, still holding Finn’s hand, after throwing a look over his shoulder.

“Quick, before they catch up!” Poe sounded excited and mischievous.

Poe led them into a smaller hallway, then another, before shoving Finn into an alcove, following right behind. He had to press himself against Finn to be invisible from the hallway, and they waited, tense, for a few moments.

Finn heard them, the ‘they’ Poe must have been talking about, a group of women by the sound of it. They paused at the end of their hallway, but kept going.

Finn relaxed.

“I think they’re gone.”

“Thank god.” Poe exhaled, relieved. The air brushed against Finn’s neck like a caress, and he couldn’t help but shiver.

Poe tensed suddenly, as if just taking notice of their positions, of how close he was to Finn. Finn didn’t dare move, scared of spooking Poe away.

Finn had to bite his lips to keep himself from whining when Poe pulled away, fresh air engulfing itself were Poe had kept him warm, leaving Finn feeling naked.

Poe didn’t leave, however, pushing away just enough to look Finn in the eyes. The hallway was too dark for Finn to make out his features, and he couldn’t guess what Poe saw on his own face.

“Poe?”

The older man exhaled raggedly, and he raised a hand to frame Finn’s face delicately. Neither of them moved as Poe’s thumbs caressed Finn’s cheek softly. Finn had to remind himself to breathe, and Poe’s eyes fluttered shut.

“Gods you drive me crazy.”

Finn felt like he couldn’t move, couldn’t breathe, couldn’t talk, and he simply stared at Poe as the other man leaned forward to press their foreheads together.

“Completely, completely crazy. Gods, Finn.” Poe’s voice was wrecked, twisting Finn’s gut in marvelous ways. “You’re so brilliant and kind and gorgeous, I swear when you smile sometimes I feel like I could fly.” The fingers against Finn’s cheek twitched. “I tried not to, I swear I tried. I tried to be a good friend to you, not to want anything else. I swear I’m not expecting anything, I would never-ever do that to you, but Finn I- I need to know. I need to know if there’s hope. If there is I swear I’ll do anything, anything for you. I will give you everything. You deserve all that’s good in the world and I’ll do all that’s in my power to be worth you.” He pressed his face even closer to Finn’s for a second before wrenching himself away, hand falling from Finn’s face.

“If you don’t feel the same way, know that I will always remain your friend, and that I will never speak a word of my feelings again.” Finn had never heard Poe so miserable, like someone was wrenching his heart away and stepping on it. “Your companionship is more important to me than-”

Finn lunged forward, grabbing Poe’s face and pressing their lips together. His aim was terrible, and he ended up kissing Poe’s cheek more than his lips, but none of that mattered, not when Poe breathed a long shivery sigh, like all his wished had been granted.

The older man curled a hand around his neck, guiding Finn to his lips, wrapping his other arm around his waist, to press him closer. Finn groaned against his lips, and Poe suddenly pushed him back into the alcove, crowding him against the wall, deepening the kiss, slipping his tongue between Finn’s lips. Finn followed his lead, hanging on for dear life and praying to all the gods for this moment to last forever.

After an eternity and a half, Poe wrenched himself away.

“We can’t stay here, anyone could see us.” His voice was choked and muted, like something was squeezing his throat.

Finn wanted to stay here and kiss Poe for the rest of his life, but a small, still reasonable part of his brain agreed with him.

“Do you need to go back to the ball?” Finn asked, frowning.

Poe looked at him for a long moment as if waiting for his brain started working again. He shook his head vigorously, curls bouncing around.

“No. I definitely do not.” His voice was almost a growl, low and gravelly.

“Let’s go home then.”

Poe surged forward, kissing Finn dirty and deep for a second before backing away once more with fire in his eyes.

“Home it is.”

Poe power walked away, sure that Finn would follow him. Finn would have been worried about the other man standing resolutely two feet away, if not for the way Poe’s hands were curled into tights fists. Finn willed himself not to touch Poe either, to fight against the urge to draw him back against him.

As soon as the door of their suite closed, Poe pressed Finn against it, mouthing at his neck, making Finn sigh and shiver, but he curled a hand in Poe’s hair, tugging until the man relented with a growl.

“Rey.”

Poe groaned and pulled away. There was an awkward pause when Poe hesitated to ask Finn to come to his room.

Finn took the initiative, grabbing his hand, dragging Poe to his own room, closing the door behind them. Poe walked a few steps further into the room, before turning back toward Finn with hungry eyes. The younger man had to lean against the door for support, knees wobbling dangerously.

“What do you want?” Poe’s voice was deeper than it had ever been, and Finn felt an answering tug in his groin.

“I don’t know.”

Poe’s eyes widened for a second, and Finn worried he would put a stop to it all until Poe took two large steps, pressing himself back against Finn, lips insistent against his, demanding access to Finn’s mouth. Finn felt Poe’s erection press against his hips and he groaned.

Poe detached himself from his lips, mouthing at his jaw, nipping at the sensitive skin under his ear.

“I’ll make you feel so good, Finn. So good.”

Finn nodded, arching his neck to give more space to Poe. One of his hand found its way to Poe’s hair, curling into it. He felt Poe moan against his neck.

“Poe.” Finn stretched Poe’s name, letting it haunt the room. He had never heard his voice like this, wanton and desperate.

“Fuck.” Poe groaned against his neck before dropping to his knees, pressing his face against Finn’s bulge, mouthing softly at his erection.

“Poe!” Finn gasped. He knew he knew other words, but couldn’t remember any of them at the moment.

Poe leaned back just enough to look at Finn.

“Can I? Please Finn, can I suck you?”

Finn felt all the air leave his lung, and he could only nod frantically. Poe beamed at him before attacking his pants.

Finn was quickly down to his underwear, and Poe growled.

“Fuck you smell so good.”

Suddenly, his underwear had disappeared, and Poe was kissing his way up Finn’s cock. Finn whined, his free hand scrambling around for support. It took all his concentration and willpower not to tug at Poe’s hair. The last thing he wanted was to hurt Poe, not when he was making Finn feel like this. He hadn’t known anything could feel this good. It certainly hadn’t when he had masturbated.

He really would have t-

“POE!”

He couldn’t stop the shout that tore itself from his throat. Poe had wrapped his lips around Finn’s cock in a smooth motion, sucking sinfully around it. The wet heat surrounding his cock was indescribable. Finn forced himself to open his eyes and look down.

Poe looked utterly debauched, lips stretched around Finn’s cock, head bobbing up and down, saliva dribbling at the corner of his mouth. He looked blissful, eyes fluttering closed, like he loved this, like he wanted to do this forever. Finn sobbed and his fingers tightened in Poe’s hair. The man’s eyes snapped open and he moaned around Finn’s cock.

Finn’s head banged against the door as he threw it back, the vibrations around his cock so delicious they were almost painful.

“Poepoepoepoepoepoepoepoepoe.”

Finn couldn’t think, couldn’t speak, could barely breathe. Poe’s mouth was heaven and- and- AND-

He shouted as he came, his whole body twitching, his mind blank.

When he came back to himself he was laying on his bed, wrapped in Poe’s arms, face pressed against his neck. Poe was murmuring, too low for Finn to understand. Finn sighed and shifted to press a kiss against Poe’s neck. The other man stopped talking for a second before chuckling, tugging Finn up until they were laying face to face.

“Hey there. Back with me?”

Finn grinning helplessly, and Poe leaned forward to kiss him sweetly. Finn couldn’t help pressing himself against Poe. The other man was still fully dressed, which was an annoyance, but that fell to the back of Finn’s mind when he felt Poe half hard cock press against his hip. He pulled away, to look at Poe.

“You didn’t-?”

Poe smiled fondly, shaking his head and leaning forward to press another sweet kiss against Finn’s mouth.

“It’s fine. You don’t have to do anything.”

Finn pulled away and rolled his eyes at Poe’s ridiculous generosity.

“What if I want to?” he asked.

He didn’t know how to use his mouth like Poe, but he had other tricks. Without waiting for Poe to answer, he slipped a hand down the front of his pants, squeezing his cock firmly.

Poe gasped, mouth falling open, cheeks turning red.

“F-Fiiiiinn.”

Hearing Poe stutter in shock and pleasure sent a thrill down Finn’s spine. He leaned forward to kiss the corner of his mouth, but Poe twisted his head to capture his mouth, demanding more, his tongue curling around Finn’s. Finn gave it to him, pushing him until Poe was laying on his back, Finn half on top of him.

He started moving his hand up and down Poe’s cock, twisting and pressing the same way he liked when he was touching himself. Poe was writhing shamelessly under him, hips twitching, chasing after the contact, begging silently for more. Finn swallowed every sound Poe made, kissing him breathless.

Poe came with a whine and a sigh, before falling down to the bed, boneless and stated. Finn stared at him for a moment. His tanned skin was flushed red, his eyes were darker than they had ever been, and his hair was a mess where Finn had gripped it earlier.

He was the most beautiful thing Finn had ever seen.

“Are you going to stare at me all night, or are you going to join me?”

Poe was looking up at him through half lidded eyes, his smile equal parts smug and adoring. Finn blushed, and pushed himself up, gesturing to the washcloth.

“I’m just going to-”

Poe snorted, shaking his head.

“Don’t bother.”

He pushed his pants down, then his underwear, which he used to clean himself. After that, he made quick work of his undershirt, throwing it in the vague direction of the chair where both their suits and shirts were discarded.

Poe then stretched himself shamelessly, and Finn couldn’t find it in himself to be ashamed of the way he ogled him.

“I’m feeling underdressed here.” Poe said, playful.

“Whose fault it that?” Finn snorted, but he got rid of his remaining clothes too, before flopping down beside Poe. The other man wasted no time in dragging Finn to him, arms wrapping themselves around his lover. Finn smiled and snuggled closer.

 

OOOOOOOOOO

 

“Hey Finn!”

Finn groaned, pressing his face against the warm mass beside him. The body moved, pulling Finn closer, and Finn sighed, contentedly.

“Finn?”

The door opened and Finn jerked up, startled, as Rey walked in, way to peppy for that time of morning.

At least Finn thought it was morning. Poe seemed to agree, groaning and flopping on the mattress, chasing Finn’s warm spot, head burrowing in the pillows.

“Morning, sleepy head, have you seen Poe aro-”

She finally took stock of the scene, from Finn sitting up, holding the covers up to his neck, covering himself and effectively tugging them off Poe, leaving the other man barely decent and very obviously naked.

Rey and Finn stared at each other for a long moment until Poe groaned.

“Finn. Cold.”

They snapped out of their daze, and Rey spun around, running out of the room. Finn let himself fall backward, narrowly avoiding landing on Poe. The other man immediately wrapped himself around Finn, pressing his face into Finn’s neck, sighing happily.

Now very awake, Finn turned his head slightly so he could kiss Poe’s hair.

“Good morning.”

Poe hummed, and Finn could feel him smile against his neck. Smiling himself up at the ceiling, Finn trailed a lazy hand up and down Poe’s back. After a few times, Poe started wiggling, trying to get Finn’s hand to go lower, and Finn made it a challenge to always stay just barely over Poe’s ass, no matter his lover’s protestation.

Poe got fed up pretty quickly, twisted them around, so Finn was fully on his back, with Poe straddling his hips. Poe smiled down goofily at Finn, forearms braced on either side of the younger man’s head.

“Hey there gorgeous.”

Finn smiled back and pushed himself up to kiss Poe. When he lowered himself back, Poe followed easily, now laying most of his weight on Finn. Finn groaned at the feeling of Poe warm skin against his, and he started running his hands over him, scrapping his blunt nails on his back or pressing down with his palms, enjoying the way the muscles pulled and tensed under Poe’s smooth skin, only marred by old battle scars.

When he started to caress his flanks, just lightly enough for it to tickle, Poe growled against his lips, wriggling. They both groaned as their half hard cocks pressed together.

Both of Finn’s hand flew to Poe’s ass out of reflex, squeezing the firm muscle, pulling Poe closer to him.

“Oh gods, Finn-” Poe gasped, hips rolling into the friction

They pushed against each other, at first languidly, Poe whispering sweet nothings to Finn while Finn raked one hand in his hair, the other one still massaging his ass.

They quickly dissolved into urgent rutting, however, desperate for release. Poe moved like he wanted to crawl under Finn’s skin, and the younger man was all for that plan, holding his lover with a vice-like grip. They had stopped trying to kiss properly, faces pressed closed, settling with breathing the same air. Finn couldn’t form any kind of words or noises apart from high pitched whines he would have been embarrassed by if Poe hips didn’t stutter every time he heard them. Poe groaned and sobbed Finn’s name over and over again, like he was pressing secrets into his lover’s skin.

Finn came first, spattering his semen all over Poe’s stomach. Poe pulled away to look at him, and with a few more thrusts, he also climaxed, growling Finn’s name.

He flopped down beside Finn, eyes closed but with a dopy smile.

Finn chuckled, looking at his face.

“Well, that was a nice way to wake up.”

Poe relented and opened his eyes to look at him.

“Yeah. Think you could stand to do it again?”

His voice was teasing, but there was a point of uncertainty in his eyes that bothered Finn. He leaned forward, kissing Poe between the eyes.

“I know I want to do it again for as long as you’ll want to.”

Poe looked at him with wide eyes full of wonder. Finn looked right back at him, knowing his face was just as adoring as Poe’s.

Finn would have happily stayed there for the rest of the day, but the semen on his belly was starting the dry, and that wasn’t a comfortable sensation. He sighed and pushed himself up, climbing over Poe.

“Don’t go.”

Finn could _hear_ Poe’s pout and he rolled his eyes fondly. He grabbed the wash cloth, and cleaned his stomach. Poe twisted around, and leered exaggeratedly at Finn with a smug smirk. Finn wasn’t sure what to say, so he simply tossed the cloth to Poe, would made a show off washing himself off, rubbing his abs way more than necessary, winking at Finn. Finn swallowed and looked away, cheeks burning.

“Are you coming back to bed?”

Finn bit back the urge to run back to Poe.

“Shouldn’t we get up? It’s getting late.”

Poe chuckled, raising his arm to rest his head on his hands.

“It’s the morning after the ball, sweetheart. No one but Rey is up before three in the afternoon.”

Finn considered that, and nodded gingerly, moving back to the bed. Poe opened his arms invitingly, and Finn laid back down, resting his head against Poe’s shoulder, one arm on his waist. Poe wrap an arm around Finn’s shoulders, trailing fingers up and down his arm.

Finn thought over everything that had happened the night before, everything Poe had told him, and he felt warmth seep through his whole body. The idea that someone like _Poe_ would ever feel like this about him was- it was revolutionary to Finn.

He couldn’t understand how Poe could possibly have thought Finn didn’t feel the same way. He had to know how much Finn cared about him, surely? Finn was not subtle about his emotions, everyone said so.

However, he remembered Poe’s despair last night, how he seemed to be tearing himself apart, and even his hesitation this morning, like he hadn’t been sure Finn would want him, that maybe the night before had been an exception, a once-off event. Maybe Finn wasn’t the only one that got slightly stupid around the man he cared for.

“I’ve loved you for a while.” Finn blurted out. Poe hadn’t said he _loved_ Finn, but that had been implied, right? Anyway, that was how Finn felt, he might as well put it in the open. Poe tensed, but Finn decided it was surprise, not rejection. He had to believe so, otherwise he wouldn’t ever say what he had to say.

“You can ask Rey, it’s true. I wasn’t going to tell you, I didn’t want to make things uncomfortable, I-. I didn’t- I was scared. I didn’t want to risk you telling me you didn’t feel the same way. I didn’t think I could take it.” Finn huffed self-deprecatingly. “I guess you’re braver than me.”

“Finn-” Poe’s voice was full of something Finn couldn’t afford to identify now. It was his turn to speak, and he needed to do so before his courage left him.

“Sometimes we’d be talking, and suddenly all I wanted was to kiss your stupid smile, see if it felt as good as it looked. It does, by the way. Or you’d be teaching me something, or we’d be fighting together, or I would show you something, and I would feel so warm and happy, and I’d want to stay right there with you forever. You were always so nice with me, always made me feel like I mattered. And I know you’re like that with everyone but you still make me feel so _special_.”

He sighed, turning his head to press a kiss to Poe’s chest.

“So yeah, that’s all I wanted to say. I’m not really good at those things, you know, you’re kind of my first. But I know that I love you, and I’m pretty sure I’ll love you for a while yet.”

There was a brief silence.

“Our fight.” Poe’s voice was carefully blank.

Finn frowned, raising his head to look at Poe. Poe was staring at the ceiling.

“What?”

“That’s when I realised I loved you. I knew I liked you, of course, how could I not? Every time you smiled at me, I felt I could float away. But I realised I loved you right after our fight. I hadn’t seen you in over a week, and suddenly you were there, fighting for my life and I was terrified for you. All I could think about was how you could have been hurt, could have died, and how I didn’t know if I could live after you. I couldn’t think over the _need_ to get you to stop, to stop you from ever endangering yourself again. But you didn’t let me take over, didn’t back down even when I yelled at you, even when I said these terrible things. You were brilliant, and so strong and- and- and everything I’d ever wanted. You were pushing away everything you’d ever been taught, fighting for yourself, for what you believed in, for what you thought was right, for _yourself_ and gods you were amazing.”

Poe shifted, finally looking down at Finn.

“After you came back that night and refused –rightly so-- to talk to me, I found Jess and got shitfaced. I got completely drunk, and I don’t remember any of it, which I guess was kind of the point. I don’t even want to know what I told Jess exactly, but she has informed me that “I fucking love him” came around at least a dozen times.”

Poe looked a bit ashamed at the memories of that night, and Finn crawled up to kiss him. Poe answered right away, relaxing back into the mattress. When they pulled apart, he looked up in Finn’s eyes with a sappy smile.

“I love you.”

Finn beamed back, pecking his lips lightly before answering.

“I love you.”

 

BANG BANG BANG

 

They jerked apart, staring at the door.

“ALRIGHT LOSERS, IF YOU DON’T LEAVE THIS ROOM IN THE NEXT TEN MINUTES, I AM COMING IN, AND I DON’T CARE IF YOU HAVE PANTS OR NOT.” Jessika yelled through the door.

Poe glared and shouted right back.

“FUCK OFF PAVA.”

She cackled.

“TEN MINUTES.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> SEX AT LAST
> 
> THANK YOU TO EVERYONE WHO WAITED PATIENTLY FOR THIS


	6. Chapter 6

Finn, knowing that Jess would definitely have no qualms about busting in, probably even before the ten minutes she promised them, got up to dress himself. Poe groaned in protestation and twisted around to ogle Finn with a lazy grin. The younger man rolled his eyes fondly before throwing his lover’s clothes on him.

Poe sighed and relented, tugging his pants off his head. He grimaced comically when he inspected his semen stained underwear.

“I think I’ll need to go get new clothes.”

Finn snorted, shrugging on Poe’s old jacket.

“Please at least put on pants, Jess is probably still waiting on the other side of the door.” He offered dryly, smoothing the fabric down.

Poe huffed, and did so, wriggling his hips alluringly. He stretched up, muscles rippling attractively, throwing a saucy wink at Finn when the younger man gulped noisily. Finn restrained himself from grabbing Poe and kissing him soundly, until he remembered he didn’t have to control himself anymore.

Poe hummed happily against his lips, leaning forward to try and deepen the kiss. Finn pulled back before they could get carried away.

“We should get going.” He said, keeping one hand on Poe’s chest to keep him from leaning back in.

Poe sighed and walked away, grabbing the rest of his clothes. Finn decided against mentioning putting on a shirt, since Poe’s room was less than ten steps away. Just before opening his door, the older man shot him a playful wink over his shoulder.

Finn’s theory was proven right as someone wolf whistled shrilly the second Poe stepped out.

“FUCK OFF PAVA.” Poe didn’t quite manage to sound irritated, and his voice shook with barely contained laughter.

Finn took a fortifying breathe and stepped out as well, closing the door behind himself. Jess and Rey were waiting for them in the living room, the former leaning on the wall at the end of the hallway, as the latter curled in the armchair.

Jess smirked in a disturbingly dirty manner, sauntering to him.

“Hey there, lover boy.” She drawled, leaning in.

Rey jumped to her feet and ran up to him, bumping Jess out of the way, wrapping Finn in a tight hug.

“Oh gods, Finn, I’m so happy for you!” she thrilled in his ear.

Finn laughed at her enthusiasm. She dragged him to the loveseat, forcing him to sit himself beside her.

“What happened? How did it happen? Tell me everything!” She asked question over question, barely breathing, definitely not leaving Finn enough time to answer.

Jess took Rey’s seat in the armchair, crossing her legs pointedly.

“Yes, Finn, tell us _everything._ ” She drawled, winking exaggeratedly.

“Is your love life so boring that you need to hear about ours, Jess?” Poe asked, now wearing loose pants and a clean shirt, as came in the room. Rey straightened up and pushed herself away to let Poe sit with Finn, but the older man shook his head with a fond smile.

Instead, he dropped himself to the floor, sitting in front of the love seat, leaning against Finn’s legs. Finn smiled, surprised but pleased, and he carded his fingers through Poe’s hair.

Poe looked up at him, pushing into the contact and smiling sappily at his lover. Jess groaned, covering her eyes.

“Oh god, you two will be _that couple_. Fuck my life.”

Rey snorted.

“You mean they weren’t already _that couple_?” she retorted.

Finn wasn’t sure what they were talking about, but couldn’t bring himself to care. Poe tried for a glare, but it was unconvincing to say the least.

“You two want us to talk or not?” he asked.

The two women apparently wanted to, and they settled down with matching curious and mischievous smiles.

Once Jess and Rey, but mostly Jess, were satisfied, they were allowed to find something to eat at long last. Finn tried to argue for the private diner room, but Poe shook his head vehemently before he even finished his sentence.

“You do not want to go in there. Under any circumstance. All the higher nobles eat there today, it’s going to be a hangover bitch fest.” Poe sounded almost scared, and Jess snorted, patting his back.

Instead they went to the mess hall, which was oddly subdued, either due to tiredness or alcohol abuse. Snap was already sitting at the table, curled over his plate, and Jess and Poe got wicked grins, bolting to press themselves against his sides, poking and prodding at the poor man. Rey rolled her eyes at their antics and tugged Finn so they would sit a little further away.

“So, you and Poe talked about your feelings.” She prodded, almost casually.

Finn glared weakly at her as he piled food on his plate.

“Yeah, yeah, I know, I should have talked to him earlier, you were right.” He answered, grumbling good-naturedly.

Apparently satisfied, she grinned at him as she chewed.

“I’m so happy for you, Finn. You two will be great together.” She said, smiling sunnily, stuffing a forkful of food in her mouth.

“I think so. Last night was- It was pretty amazing.” Finn ducked his head, rubbing the back of his neck.

She nodded. Thankfully she really wasn’t interested in the dirty details, contrary to Jess. She was simply happy that Finn finally got his shit together.

“Are you going to tell people?” she asked.

“I don’t know, we haven’t talked about it. You and Jess already know, and Jess will probably tell Snap soon. After that I don’t know.” Finn shrugged. He didn’t really care either way at the moment.

She nodded, smiling brightly. Finn was once again reminded why he loved her so much.

Poe spent the rest of the day holed up in his quarters with Finn and Rey, avoiding the rest of the ball guests who might have wanted to talk to him before leaving the castle.

Poe taught the both of them poker, leading to Finn being creamed by his friends. Between Poe’s experience and Rey’s ability to see right through the both of them, he didn’t stand a chance. At some point, he just left them to battle it out and entertained himself with Baby, throwing the dog a ball and trying to teach him to return it, which he miraculously achieved.

A servant came to bring them diner, which they ate sitting on the floor in front of the fire while Baby tried to steal away bits and nibbles. Shortly after that, Rey got to her feet.

“I’m going to bed, long night last night. Please try not to make too much noise.”

She gave them a meaningful look. Finn chocked on air, but Poe only smirked up at her. She left with a roll of her eyes, grabbing Baby with her.

As soon as she had left the room, Poe shifted closer to Finn, wrapping an arm around his waist.

“She doesn’t mind, does she? Us?”

Finn tucked his head against Poe’s neck, breathing in his warm spicy sent.

“Rey? She’s thrilled. She’s been telling me to tell you how I felt for weeks.” He murmured self-deprecatingly.

Poe chuckled, squeezing Finn’s waist.

“You should have listened to her.”

Finn snorted.

“Story of my life. Didn’t end up too badly, though.” He punctuated his sentence with a kiss against Poe’s neck.

Poe sighed, and he shifted until Finn raised his head so he could kiss him. They stayed there for a little while, enjoying each other, until Poe broke away.

“Maybe we should take this to somewhere more comfortable?” His voice was smooth and suave.

Finn nodded eagerly, belly twisting in anticipation, and got to his feet, tugging Poe after him. He hesitated in front of his own door, but Poe pushed gently a warm hand against the small of his back, directing him toward the door to his room.

“Less chance to bother Rey.” He answered to Finn’s inquisitive look.

It was the first time Finn had entered Poe’s room. It was fairly uncluttered and plain, which made sense. Poe only really used it to sleep, and was gone for most of the day. The only notable decorations were the two portraits on the wall. The gorgeous a man and woman could only be Poe’s parents.

Poe gave him a moment to look around before grabbing his waist and claiming his attention with a searing kiss. Finn gave in willingly, smiling against his mouth.

Poe slowly pushed him toward the bed, never breaking their kiss. Just as Finn’s knees hit the mattress, Poe tugged his shirt over his head before pushing Finn down. Finn stared up at him, mouth falling open as Poe made a show of removing his own shirt, flexing and rippling his muscles for his enjoyment. As soon as he was done, Finn reached for him.

“Come here.” His voice was deep and gravely, unlike Finn had ever heard. Poe’s eyes darkened, mouth falling slack. He scrambled to obey, crawling over Finn’s body to find his mouth again. Finn hummed in the back of his throat, and moved his hands down Poe’s back, but just before he could reach his ass, his lover tore himself away, grabbing Finn’s hands.

“No. I have plans for tonight.” Poe looked hungry and determined, and Finn could only nod, breathless. Poe smirked in answer, bending down to peck Finn’s lips before straightening back up, curving his spine enticingly.

He shifted backward until he was straddling Finn’s thighs, and slowly, torturously, lowered Finn’s pants.

Finn gasped when his cock sprung free and hit cold air. Poe sighed.

“Gods you’re gorgeous.” He took Finn’s cock in his hand, squeezing softly. Finn groaned, eyes fluttering shut.

“Look at me. Finn, look at me.” Poe asked softly.

Finn swallowed and obeyed.

“Poe.” He pleaded. He wasn’t sure what he was asking for, but he knew he really wanted it.

Poe lunged forward, kissing him fiercely. He pulled back just enough to whisper against Finn’s lips.

“I want you to fuck me. I need you inside me. I want to ride you _all night long._ ” Poe murmured fiercely.

Finn grabbed Poe’s hair, smashing their lips together.

“Yes, gods yes, Poe.” Anything Poe wanted that much had to be unreally amazing.

Poe sat back up, quickly getting rid of both their pants, and Finn ran appreciative eyes over his lover’s body as he retrieved a vial from the table. Poe opened his and poured a viscous liquid over his fingers, while he braced his other hand on Finn’s chest.

He reached behind himself, and Finn knew the exact moment Poe pushed his finger in. His eyelids fluttered and he whimpered. Finn wasn’t an idiot, he had informed himself about homosexual coitus; he knew the basics. He knew what Poe was doing, but he was relieved his lover was more experienced than him in this area.

However, Finn also couldn’t just stay still while Poe worked himself open, and started running firms hands up and down Poe’s flanks and thighs. His lover opened his eyes, staring down lovingly at Finn. Finn swallowed helplessly.

“Talk to me.” Finn’s voice was rusty, barely recognizable.

Poe groaned and dropped his head, the hand stretching his ass moving faster. Finn guessed he had added a second finger.

“I thought about you so much, Finn. All the time, all the fucking time. I would touch myself every fucking night and wish it was you, wishing it was your hand around my cock, your cock in my ass.” He mewled and Finn was pretty sure he had just added a third finger. “All I could think when I was sucking your dick was how big and thick and gorgeous it was. You’re gonna feel so good, Finn. So _fucking_ good.”

He took his hand away from his ass, wiping it on his sheets. He shifted until he was straddling Finn’s groin, bracing himself on his lover’s shoulders. Finn grabbed his thighs, almost trembling in anticipation.

“Ready, love?”

Finn nodded frantically, and Poe caught one of his hands, bringing it to his mouth to kiss his palm.

He used his other one to hold Finn’s cock as he slowly started sinking down on it.

Finn’s brain fizzed out. Poe was tighter, warmer, and slicker than Finn could process, and he barely stopped himself from grabbing Poe and slam him down.

Poe finally bottomed out, and Finn couldn’t breathe.

“Gods, Finn, you’re so- so- Finn!”

Poe rolled his hips, and they groaned together. Finn’s hands tightened reflexively around Poe’s hips before he forced himself to let go. Poe whined and grabbed Finn’s hands, pressing them to him.

“No. No, please! Please fuck me. Finn, please-”

Finn didn’t need to be told twice, and he grabbed Poe’s ass, and they started moving frantically together. There was nothing sensual or distinguished about this, only the both of them chasing after their release together. Very quickly the only thing they could say, the only words they remembered, was each other’s name, gasped, groaned, mewled.

Finn came first, arching clear off the bed, his vice grip on Poe’s thighs the only thing keeping his lover on. Poe sobbed when he felt Finn’s cum fill his ass, and he writhed, desperate for climax.

“Finnfinnfinnfinnfinn-”

Finn slumped back down, and brought Poe down to kiss him with a hand in his hair, while the other pumped his cock until he was bursting too, gasping against Finn’s mouth.

They didn’t move for a long while, not until Finn’s cock softened and slipped out of Poe. The older man groaned in mourning, before flopping on his front beside Finn.

“You go get the washcloth.” He demanded, voice rough and strung out.

Finn complied easily after kissing Poe’s cheek. When he came back, he couldn’t help but stand transfixed at the sight of his own semen trickling out of Poe’s ass, and he was almost tempted to leave Poe like that, but he imagined that would be uncomfortable. He cleaned his lover tenderly, before laying down by his side again. Poe immediately wrapped himself around Finn, dragging a cover over the both of them.

“Goodnight Poe.”

“Goodnight love.”

 

OOOOOOOOOO

 

The morning after rang the return to normal life. Finn and Poe miraculously didn’t oversleep, and dragged themselves grudgingly out of bed after a few lazy kisses.

When they stepped into the living room, Rey smirked at them.

“Here I thought I would have to get you up.”

Poe stuck his tongue out at her. Finn only smiled fondly, walking over to kiss her forehead. She leaned into him, and smiled back at him when he drew back.

Stepping back in the arena was harsh and relieving. They hadn’t trained for a few days now because of the ball, and it was amazing to spar again, even if their muscles were protesting the sudden return to their usual regimens. Finn had to admit the sex might have helped take the edge off of their inactivity however.

After, Poe and Finn were called to a Council meeting to talk about what had transpired during the ball. Finn took a seat beside Poe, after saying a few words to Korr. Despite being there, nominally, as Poe’s bodyguard, he was allowed to take a seat and participate in the conversation.

Finn wouldn’t put it past the Queen to have arranged this to educate him into becoming a reliable adviser for Poe.

Today, however, was the first time he interacted with the Queen since he and Poe started their –relationship? Finn wasn’t sure how he should act, but he knew the middle of the Council wasn’t the place and time to do whatever he would decide to do.

He elected to act like nothing special had happened until he could clarify with Poe what course of action they wanted to follow.

Poe seemed to have something else in mind.

Poe was surprisingly not a big fan of public displays of affection. He wasn’t ashamed of Finn by any stretch of imagination, nor did he tried to keep them secret. He openly talked about the both of them with Rey, Jess and Snap, and he had given Jess his blessing to tell the rest of the cavalry, which meant the whole castle would know by dinner that night. However, despite how touchy feely he could get with his friends, he didn’t do things like hold Finn’s hand in public, or kiss him where anyone could see him. Finn didn’t know what that was about, but Poe had _no_ problem touching him in private, so it didn’t concern him overly much.

That was why, in the middle of Korr reporting some tension between some nobles, Finn almost jumped out of his chair when he felt Poe hand’s creep on his thigh. He turned his head ever so slightly toward Poe. His lover gave him a wicked smirk before turning back to the meeting with a blandly interested look.

Finn took a deep breathe, and faced the table as well, trying to focus. That was stuff he needed to know, he actually needed to pay attention.

He quickly lost his train of thoughts again when Poe’s hand trailed slowly up toward his crotch. When he finally reached his cock and pressed gently, Finn inhaled sharply, violently repressing any other noise he might make. He glared at Poe from the corner of his eyes, and the man innocently mouthed at him “Behave”.

Finn couldn’t tell him off without attracting attention, and he decided he was going to win this game, damn him.

Poe kept teasing him for the rest of the meeting, hand moving up and down Finn’s thigh, sometimes as light as a feather, sometimes pressing firmly. Finn was glad that this was not the kind of meeting anyone would expect him to participate much in, because he didn’t think he could string together a coherent sentence that wasn’t about Poe and his wicked hands. Despite all this, Finn kept a straight face and didn’t utter a sound.

When the Queen called off the meeting, hours later, Finn bolted out of the room after the quickest goodbyes he could afford, hoping to leave before anyone noticed his erection. He went as far as the next corner, leaning against the wall just out of sight, breathing in and out as steadily as he could.

He heard someone follow him, recognized Poe’s gate. Just as the man turned the corner, Finn grabbed his arm and spun them around, pushing Poe against the wall. He lunged in, claiming Poe’s mouth in an almost brutal kiss. He nipped at Poe’s lower lip just this side of too hard, and pushed his tongue in his mouth when he gasped.

Poe made a weak sound of protest, but when Finn pushed a hand deep in his hair and tugged, he went boneless against him with a whine, arms wrapping themselves loosely around Finn’s waist. Finn pushed closer, kissed harder, demanded more from Poe. It was dirty and searing, it was Finn taking over. It was everything he wanted, after Poe’s endless teasing.

Distantly, he heard someone approaching, and he wrenched himself away from Poe, taking a step back. Poe whined mournfully at him, reflexively pushing himself off the wall to reach for Finn.

“Fiiiiiinn-”

Poe was a mess, hair sticking in every direction from where Finn had gripped it too tight, his face red and his lips swollen and shiny. Even his clothes were askew.

Finn simply smirked at him and pushed him back against the wall with one firm hand.

“Behave yourself.”

He blessed his own dark skin and short hair, because when Korr rounded the corner, he looked as put together as he ever was. Poe, on the other hand, frantically tried to right himself, with very limited success, under Finn’s and Korr’s amused gazes.

“Finn.” Korr’s voice was impressively bland.

“Korr.” Finn didn’t bother hiding his pride.

“My lord.” Korr addressed Poe, and left without waiting for an answer.

Poe was staring at Finn wordlessly, and the younger man suddenly felt uneasy, afraid he pushed too far, too hard, until Poe’s face broke into a dazed smile.

“We need to do that again.” He sounded almost drunk.

Finn’s eyebrows jumped to his hairline, and Poe amended quickly.

“Somewhere with a door and a mattress ideally.”

 

OOOOOOOOOO

 

“Finn? Can I talk to you?” The Queen had walked up to Finn as he was sitting outside of the armory, polishing his sword. Finn looked up, surprised.

“Of course. Are you still looking for Poe? He went looking for you a while ago?” Right after Korr had interrupted them, in fact. One of the Queen’s handmaidens had found Poe before he could drag Finn back to their rooms, saying the Queen needed to talk to him.

Without Finn.

That had been almost an hour ago.

“No, I’ve already talked with Poe, don’t worry.” She sat herself on the bench beside him.

“What can I do for you then, Your Majesty?” Finn kept his tone polite and neutral, despite his nerves.

“It’s been brought to my attention that you and Duke Dameron have initiated a relationship.”

Finn paled and froze. He hadn’t expected to have to go through this talk by himself. He steeled himself, reminding himself that Poe loved him; that whatever the Queen would say would probably not change that.

“We did, Your Majesty.” He answered, voice a lot steadier than he felt.

Queen Organa stared at him for a long moment, and Finn forced himself to keep his eyes open, to face his fate straight on.

“I want you to know, first of all, most important of all perhaps, that you have my blessing.”

Finn suddenly felt lightheaded, and the Queen put a warm hand on his shoulder.

“You make him happier than I have ever seen him, and I know you will keep doing so. You are a good man, Finn, and I couldn’t have imagined a better match for Poe. However, now that this has been said, I want you to know, to _really_ know, that you are allowed, at any time, to terminate your relationship with Poe, should you want to.” She raised a hand as Finn lurched forward to protest. “I know you feel like you will never want such a thing, and I hope from the bottom of my heart that it is so. But life happens sometimes, and the last thing anyone in the castle wants, Poe included, is for you to stay with him out of obligation or the sense that you are stuck. Do you understand me?”

“Yes, Your Majesty.” Even though the thought of leaving Poe, or even worse of Poe leaving him was making him sick, he forced himself to understand what she was saying.

“In terms of your relationship, however, the only thing I would ask of you is to please try keep a low profile for the moment. I know Poe was the one to blame for what happened during the Council this afternoon, but please do try to keep professional fronts. Despite how much he’d rather forget about it, Poe will be king someday, and has to appear respectable.”

Finn felt himself blush and he nodded jerkily.

“Yes your Majesty.”

The Queen leaned forward with a fond smile.

“And please, call me Leia when we are amongst family.”

She raised to her feet and left with more poise and grace than Finn believed he or Poe would ever be able to achieve.

He stayed frozen, before jolting upright, racing to the armory to put his blade back.

He needed to find Poe.

Now.

 

Poe was pacing in their private rooms, anxious, when Finn threw the door open. Without a word, he grabbed the front of Poe’s shirt and dragged him to his room.

As soon as the door closed behind him, Finn pushed Poe into it, kissing him fiercely, one hand framing Poe’s face, the other tangling in his hair. He wrenched himself away, and tightened his hold on Poe’s hair when the other man tried to follow him. Poe whined in the back of his throat before slumping against the door, panting, staring at Finn with disbelieving hungry eyes.

“Fiiiinn-” Poe wasn’t begging but didn’t seem that far from it.

Finn crowded against him, mouth a hair apart from Poe’s.

“She knows. The Queen knows about us, and about you not being able to behave yourself at the Council.” Finn murmured darkly against Poe’s lips.

Poe gulped and whispered back.

“I know, I know, I’m sorry, I’m sor-yaargh-”

Finn didn’t let him finish, biting down at his neck just hard enough to sting. Poe yelped, hands grasping at Finn’s shoulders while his hips stuttered helplessly against his thighs for friction.

“What will you do about it, now?” Finn could barely recognize his voice, low and dark. Poe seemed to appreciate it, hips pushing up even harder against Finn, hands tightening. With a growl, Finn caught them with the hand that wasn’t buried in Poe’s hair, pushing them into the door above Poe’s head. The man gasped, and started shaking his head.

“Anything, anything you want, gods, Finn. I’ll do anything, please Finn.”

Taken aback by Poe’s passion, and unsure how far he could take _whatever_ they were doing, Finn took a step back, letting go of Poe. The other man took a reflective quick step forward, plastering himself over Finn, whispering hotly against his lips.

“NO! No, Finn, don’t. I- I need you to fuck me into the mattress. Just push me down and take what you need, Finn. Please, please Finn. ”

Stricken, Finn nodded quickly, nipping at Poe’s lips before pushing him roughly toward the bed. Poe caught on immediately, stripping himself with impressive speed before throwing himself on the mattress on his forearms and knees, spreading his legs invitingly.

Finn’s blood roared, and he walked over slowly, taking the glorious view in. He ran a possessive hand over Poe’s body, from his strong thighs to his soft hair, before grabbing the vial of oil Poe kept by his bedside.

He hadn’t done this before, only watched Poe, but he had a pretty good idea what he was supposed to do.

He coated his fingers in oil, and pressed his index in. Poe gasped and wriggled, hands clenching. Finn stopped, worried, and tried to remove his finger, but Poe reached behind immediately, grabbing his wrist.

“NO!” he shouted, desperate.

Finn stared for a second, before swallowing his doubts and pushing his finger back in. Poe whined appreciatively, and rolled his hips, trying to drag more inside. Reassured, Finn started pumping his finger in and out, entranced by the movement and the delectable sounds it dragged out of Poe.

He added two more fingers, staring at the glorious sight of Poe lost in pleasure, writhing against his bed.

“Finn, I’m ready, I’m ready, I swear, please fuck me, please, please I swear it’ll be good, I’ll be so good for you, please Finn.” Poe was definitely begging now, flushed and shameless.

Finn was pretty sure he was bigger than three fingers, but Poe seemed sure, and his cock was so hard it hurt.

He opened his pants, shoving his underwear down. He didn’t bother with the rest of his clothes. The only thing that mattered now was Poe.

He lined himself up, and pushed in, determined to take his time. The last thing he wanted was to hurt Poe.

His resolution lasted until he felt Poe tighten around the head of his cock and he groaned, his hips snapping forward, seeking more of that heat, and he quickly sheathed himself fully into Poe.

Poe whined under him, back arching gloriously and hips pushing insistently against Finn’s, begging for more.

Finn growled, leaning forward to bite the meat of Poe’s shoulder. His lover mewled, and his head dropped, tightening reflexively around Finn.

Finn braced himself on Poe’s shoulder and rammed into him.

“Oh gods yes, Finn, Finn, Finn! You’re so good, so good, more, more, more, kriff yes, please!”

Finn kept slamming in over and over again, lost in Poe’s tight wet heat. He was as silent as Poe was vocal, groaning and gasping and babbling nonsensical sentences.

He felt his release approach, and he grabbed Poe’s hips, lifting him clear off the bed and pumped into him at that perfect angle. Poe gasped and came all over the sheets.

“Oh gods, FIIIIINNNN!”

Finn came right after him, his grip on Poe tight enough to leave dark bruises as he filled Poe’s ass.

He dropped Poe back to the bed and followed him, laying heavily on top of his lover, planting soft kisses between Poe’s shoulder blades and on the back of his neck.

Gingerly, he pulled out. Poe shook his head laxly, reaching behind to grab his thigh.

“Stay.”

Finn huffed a laugh, grabbing Poe’s hand to press a kiss into his palm.

“I kind of need to see your face right now.”

Poe hesitated before nodding with a warm huff, and twisted on his side as soon as Finn was out. Finn let himself drop on the mattress, reaching for Poe. His lover was already doing the same, wrapping himself around Finn, kissing him with a lot of enthusiasm and very little coordination. Finn sighed, pushing himself even closer.

“Was that okay? I didn’t go too strong? I didn’t hurt you, did I?”

Now that the haze of lust was fading away, Finn was starting to worry, trying to pull away to check on Poe. Poe curled a hand around the back of his neck, bringing Finn back firmly. He pulled back slightly, wriggling his hips slightly before sighing blissfully.

“It was amazing, Finn.”

Finn nodded, curling up against Poe.

“I was pretty rough.”

Poe chuckled.

“Yeah, you were perfect. I loved it.”

 

OOOOOOOOOO

 

Rey glared at them when they finally left their room later that day, well after dinner. Finn grimaced as he went over to hug her.

“I’m sorry.” He offered, rubbing the back of his neck.

“Look, I’m happy for the both of you, I really am. But please don’t abandon me anymore. Especially not when everyone is trying to determine whether you two are really ‘banging’. At least seven people came to ask me if you two are fucking during dinner.”

Poe frowned, and walked over, hugging Rey as well, kissing her forehead.

“I’m so sorry, Rey, it was my fault. I promise it won’t happen again.”

She smiled gratefully at them, leaning in their hugs.

“I don’t want to impose on you, I know you want time by yourself, but-”

Finn shook his head.

“We can find times for ourselves without leaving you behind. I promise we’ll behave now.”

She snickered and leaned away. Poe and Finn let her go, and they all settled on the couch. Rey wrapped her arms around her knees while Finn curled against Poe’s chest.

“Even Poe?”

Poe mock-glared at her.

“I can behave.”

“Yeah, you just usually don’t want to.”

Poe shrugged.

“Sure I do, when it’s worth it.”

Rey beamed at him.

Then yelped as Baby stuck his cold nose into the crook of her elbow.

 

OOOOOOOOOO

 

If Rey and Jess disappeared from the castle the next day, leaving Finn and Poe to deal with the hordes of gossip seekers and disappointed admirers by themselves, well the two men had no one to blame but themselves.

By common agreement, everyone took to eat a lot more meals in the private dining room for a few weeks.

Poe loved the castle and almost everyone in it, but sometimes a man needed to be able to eat sausage without some envious courtesan giving him shit for it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know this was supposed to be the last chapter, but a small epilogue plot bunny attacked me and it would have been weird to add it here, so there's still that to look forward to!


	7. Chapter 7

“Why are we doing this, again?” Finn was fidgeting with his cuffs, trying to fix his clothes despite the fact that Edna just left the room after helping him get dressed.

Poe walked up to him, wrapping his arms around Finn’s waist from behind, grabbing his hands and tangling their fingers together. He kissed Finn’s neck softly, tightening his hold around his lover.

“Finn-” His tone was fond and patient, which was more than Finn knew he deserved. After all, he had asked variations on the same question multiple times in the last few hours.

“I know, I know, I’m sorry.” Finn interrupted Poe with a sigh, leaning back against him.

“It’s been a year since we started dating, love. If we wait any longer to present you to the people, they’ll start to talk.” Poe explained for the seventh time that day, kissing Finn’s cheek.

“They’re already talking Poe. The heir to the throne is fucking his bodyguard.” Finn reminded him, rolling his eyes.

“No, the heir to the throne is making passionate love to the love of his life. And the heir to the throne wants to tell everyone about it so they stop thinking that he’s still holding out for someone else.” Poe nipped on Finn’s neck. Finn hummed in answer, sighing.

“I’m fine with staying just your bodyguard.” Finn was definitely pouting, and he knew Poe could hear it. He really wasn’t eager to be promoted from bodyguard to Royal Consort, with everything that that entailed.

Poe spun him around, and pressed their foreheads together.

“You’ll still be my bodyguard, love. But just imagine, starting from today, you’ll never have to stand idly by while some heiress tries to seduce me away.” Poe needled with a sly smirk. Finn couldn’t stop himself from smirking back.

Ever since the rumor of them being involved had seeped out, an impressing number of hopeful admirers had appeared in the castle. Rey had had to physically hold Finn back a few time as the most adventurous of them draped themselves over Poe while throwing nasty glares at Finn over his shoulder.

Afterward, Finn would take great satisfaction in bending Poe over the nearest table and fuck him senseless while his lover begged him to please, please, _please_ bite him, bruise him, mark him so that everyone would know who Poe really belonged to.

Finn always obliged, and would slink behind Poe like a smug cat as his lover walked around the castle bearing marks of his mouth all over his throat.

Yeah, Finn could see why the Queen was so insistent on them officialising their relationship. She had had suffered through numerous dinners sitting between angry, envious nobles and an obviously proudly satisfied Poe.

“But what if-” Finn tried to ask through his tight throat.

“What if what? What if they don’t like you? Everyone already knows you around here, and everyone loves you.” Poe tilted Finn’s head back so he could look in his eyes.

“Not everyone.” Finn replied with a muted voice.

“ _I_ love you. Leia loves you. Every noble that didn’t want to marry me loves you. Fuck the rest of them.” Poe whispered back hotly, before capturing Finn’s lips, possibly trying to distract him.

It worked. Finn still hadn’t faced an issue that Poe couldn’t make disappear with a kiss.

They were interrupted by a knock at the door, and Rey popped her head in. Even she had dressed up for the occasion. She had refused to wear a dress, but her pant-tunic combination was tasteful and glamourous in a way only Edna could figure out.

“Queen Organa says it’s time. You ready?” She sounded nervous herself, despite her only role in this whole mess was to stand close to Finn and Poe and look good.

Finn nodded and pulled apart from Poe who relented but still grabbed the younger man’s hand, lacing their fingers together. Finn wondered if Poe could feel his hand trembling.

Leia was waiting for them in front of the main doors. Finn knew that right outside stood a stage where the announcement would be made.

She drew Finn into a brief hug, and kept her hands on his shoulders as they drew apart.

“Are you ready, Finn?” Her voice was kind and warm, and Finn tried to let his wash over him and calm him.

“Hell no.” he answered with a shaky voice, but he squared his shoulders and set his jaw anyway.

Leia nodded approvingly, walking up to the doors. With one last look over her shoulder, she told the guards to open the doors and stepped out. Finn and Poe followed right behind her with Rey exiting last.

Once on the stage, Poe and Finn stood silently behind the Queen, never letting go of each other’s hand. Finn felt like he was floating and falling at the same time, and like Poe was the only thing anchoring him.

The Queen would be doing most of the talking today. Finn would only have to swear an oath to be faithful to Poe and the crown, and he had practiced it so often he could recite it in his sleep. According to Poe, he actually did. For the moment, he simply focused on staying upright on the stage. He didn’t want to think about the gossips that would be milling around D’Qar if he face-planted in front of the kingdom.

He vaguely registered the Queen finishing her speech and gesturing the both of them forward. Finn’s feet moved almost of their own accords.

He felt the eyes of the hundreds of people massed in front of the stage digging into him, dissecting him, weighting him. By his side, Poe had the confidence of someone who had done something similar dozens of time before, but Finn couldn’t help but regret he hadn’t been by Poe’s side when his lover had been presented as the new heir to the throne.

The applauses that had punctuated the end of the Queen’s speech slowly died down, and Finn took a deep breathe, praying for a steady voice.

“I, Finn, swea-”

“TRAITOR!” a voice tore through the square, and Finn froze, gripping Poe’s hand even tighter.

“You are a Trooper of the Knights of Ren. You were bred to serve Kylo Ren and the Supreme Leader! You betray us all, FN-2187!”

Everyone seemed stuck into place. Suddenly, the crowd split, pushed roughly to the sides as a lone figure unsheathed their sword, wearing the famous Trooper helmet. Finn felt all his blood leave his face. Poe wrenched his hand away from his to grab his own blades, already yelling for the guards to apprehend the Trooper.

“You and this _faggot_ are throwing this world into chaos and perversion! Today the Knights will purge you!” The Trooper screamed, throwing his arms, and his sword wide.

Suddenly, screams fused from the crowd. People were thrown down and away, and Trooper masks appeared everywhere.

Like through a dream, Finn saw the citizens run away from the Troopers, denial clouding his thoughts.

 

_A man pushed a little girl toward safety with a desperate shout, and turned to the Troopers, trying to slow them down, trying to save her life._

 

Finn knew.

Finn knew what would happen before it did. The inevitability felt carved into his bones as he saw a Trooper slash down the man with a dismissive grunt and step over his body.

Finn felt years of rage pour into him and run through him, reeling up to be set against those who dared to come into _his_ city and hurt _his_ people.

He lunged forward, drawing out his sword. Without a sound, without a scream, without a warning he slammed into the Troopers.

He knew Rey was on his left. He knew Poe was on his right.

He knew the guards and Jess and Snap were at his back.

 

He knew he would rain fury down on the Knights of Ren.

 

He knew he would crush them.

 

The guard and the Resistance, posted all around the square for the occasion, were fighting the Troopers as well, making themselves an impenetrable wall for the people who looked for refuge. The square only had one exit other than the castle: most people couldn’t flee.

Their exit cut off and now facing the rage of D’Qar’s best fighters, the Troopers were quickly surrounded. Finn realised that they were far fewer than had first appeared, barely over two dozen. They had to know they couldn’t prevail, but their dour situation only seemed to encourage them to fight even harder. Most of them were killed before long, and the few that managed to hang on to their lives were disarmed and taken alive when the Resistance pressed forward.

The remaining Troopers were brought to Finn and Poe, and thrown roughly on their knees. The two men were once again standing side by side, in the middle of the square, blades bloody and bodies thrumming with anger and adrenaline.

Finn suddenly had to resist the powerful urge to lace his fingers with Poe’s again, to seek for reassurance in the middle of the bloodbath.

Without a word, Finn walked to the Trooper closest to him instead and removed his helmet, with perhaps a little more strength than necessary.

The soldier was young, at least a few years younger than Finn had been when he had fled. Taking his lead, the Resistance bared the face of the other Troopers as well.

Poe cursed under his breathe. None of the soldiers were old enough to grow a beard yet. None of them were old enough for battle, let alone one where they would be so drastically outnumbered as this one.

“Cannon fodder.” Finn spit the word out, throwing the helmet to the ground. The boy in front of him sneered up at him, but Finn saw fear and doubt in his eyes.

“That’s what they sent you here to be. All of you. Cannon fodder, to be ordered to your deaths to weaken me and Poe.” He told them, raising his voice to be heard by all, forcing himself to stay calm.

When he looked around, he realised a lot of the people were still there, reassured by the Resistance’s quick victory, now staring at Finn with a worrying array of expressions. Finn wasn’t more comfortable with their admiration than with their disgust.

He had to look away, weary now in a way he couldn’t remember being for a long time.

Poe was standing a few meters away with worried eyes. Finn stared at him for a few seconds before clenching his jaw and looking back up at the people.

“I was a Trooper. I trained since I was child to serve the Knights of Ren. It’s true. That’s not something I can change.” His voice was strong and steady, and he knew it could be heard from every corner of the square. “But I could change what I would become. And I did. I left the Knight. I left when I realised how wrong they were. I left when I realised I could never kill innocent people. I wanted to find a better life. I wanted to be a better person. And I found it, I found myself, here. In D’Qar. I found a life where I could be who I wanted to be, and fight for those and what I believed in. I am Finn, friend of Queen Organa, bodyguard to the heir to the throne, lover of Poe Dameron. I fight for them. I fight for all of you.”

He turned toward the Troopers, and saw them flinch away, terrified.

“And I can personally assure that anyone who decides to leave the Knights of Ren to find another way will find a friend and ally in me as well.” Finn wasn’t surprised to see skeptical defiance in the boys’ eyes, and only hoped he would be able to bring them to the light.

If he had done it, anyone could.

He took a step back, letting the Resistance bring the Troopers to their feet and drag them toward the castle’s jail.

Poe walked up to him, pressing their shoulders together. Finn let his eyes fall shut and tried to absorb some off the warmth and comfort Poe was offering him.

He felt Poe shift against him, and he opened back his eyes to see a little girl walk to him. Flashes of a man pushing her away to fight for her life popped in Finn’s head, and he swayed slightly as he watched her.

Her dress was splattered with blood and her cheeks was strayed with tears but she looked up at him with large bright eyes.

Finn dropped to his knees in front of her.

“Thank you for saving my life.” Her voice was wavering, but she set her jaw. An older couple came toward them running, and grabbed the girl.

“Mommy! Daddy!”

Finn jumped to his feet, and the mother grabbed one of his hands in both of them. “Thank you so much.”

Someone started clapping, one lone person breaking the tense silence, and someone joined, than another, than another and Finn found himself deafened by the crowd.

Poe grabbed his hand and raised it, and suddenly the crowd roared.

“I present you Finn, Protector of the People and future Prince Consort of D’Qar!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And we're done! This turned into some kind of wonderful monster I didn't expect to write!
> 
> I hope you've enjoyed this! I love all of you \o/


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